Arrested for Assaulting a Family Member After Getting Grabbed

My question involves criminal law for the state of: VA

I was charged w/Assault on Family Member. My X grabbed my arm & when I pulled my arm free I knocked off his glasses. Yes I did use profane language & told him 2 get his F*ing hands off of me. We were @ our child’s game in the parking lot.
The Police were called & others told the Officer they saw me hit HIM in the face "multiple times"!
Yet witness in front of me told the Officer I didn’t hit my X. The Officer did NOT ask my X what happened.
I was not asked if I was on narcotics the Officer TOLD me he had reason 2 believe I was! & then asked me WHAT Narcotic I was on. He NEVER asked me if I had been drinking. When I told him I was NOT on Narcotics he told me I was being uncooperative & had 0 choice but 2 send me 2 jail & That he warned me 2 B cooperative. The Officer REFUSED 2 give me a field test breath blood or urine test. Nor did the magistrate or jail officers.
I was ARRESTED! 4 Assault & Charged w/Profane Language+ Being UI of Narcotics! B/c he said my Pupils were "pin sized” It was daylight, I had 0 sunglasses & I was crying.

When my X & I talked I asked him how he COULD do that 2 me We get along fairly well & neither of us hit the other. He told me the Officer came 2 him & said I was being Arrested 4 Assault on him & was handed a copy of the Protective Order & the Assault Charge. The Officer @ 0 point asked him what happened & my X will testify 2 the fact that I did NOT hit him ALL happened as I detailed.
Not 2 mention the emotional toll this had on our child 2 see me arrested. I was taken 2 jail & now have 2 go 2 court 4 these charges w/the "help" of a Public Defender who has yet 2 make an appt w/me after many attempts & mssg’s FINALLY he agreed 2 a phone appt w/ me next week. This happened the end of last month! I go 2 court next week!

The Officer DID TRULY Falsely arrest me! I have NEVER been in ANY trouble before. I have 0 criminal record & am terrified as Judges tend 2 believe Officers over Defendants. My 1st date is 4 the UI & profanity. I am @ risk of being permanently negatively affected always if this is my criminal record b/c the Officer made a report w/o asking the "abused person" which WOULD have prevented ALL of this!
Do I have any REAL chance of being believed? My X is not being "called" as a witness 2 this court hearing. TIA 4 advice!

Before I get to trying to answer your questions, I’m going to indulge myself with a little soapbox time. This one statement you made really struck me as quite telling:

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Quoting Ignorant 2 Law Need Help

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Not 2 mention the emotional toll this had on our child 2 see me arrested.

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So, by your own account, you were involved in a screaming match with your “X” (ex-what? Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, baby-daddy/mommy?) that included vulgarity and profanity. This escalated to a point that MULTIPLE witnesses believed that violence had either already occurred or, at least, that it was imminent. This incident was so over the top that at least one person felt compelled to call the police to intervene and MULTIPLE people were willing to stick around at give statements to the police who responded. And, you engaged in this sordid behavior at a youth sporting event! A family venue with children present (some of whom it is presumed were YOUR child’s friends and teammates) and your own child watching! And, you want to blame the “emotional toll” and embarrassment your child suffered on the police officer who responded to quell this disgusting scene that YOU created and engaged in??? Seriously? You need to take a realistic look in the mirror some time.

Now, on to some of the points that you are actually looking for responses to:

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Quoting Ignorant 2 Law Need Help

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I was charged w/Assault on Family Member. My X grabbed my arm & when I pulled my arm free I knocked off his glasses.

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Ok, I assume that this is what resulted in the assault charge. I have a hard time understanding how you can knock off someone’s glasses by pulling your arm AWAY from them. It is perfectly understandable to me that the responding officer would have the same difficulty. I suspect that a prosecutor, judge, and jury members would have equal difficulty. Especially when MULTIPLE witnesses gave statements that you struck your “X” “multiple times.”

Your “X” was an involved party and has a personal motivation to minimize the incident. Therefore, any statements that he might provide that minimize your actions would have limited credibility in the face of multiple contradictory statements from uninvolved parties with no dog in the fight. Who were the “witnesses in front of me” who told the officer that you did not hit your “X”?

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Quoting Ignorant 2 Law Need Help

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Yes I did use profane language & told him 2 get his F*ing hands off of me. We were @ our child’s game in the parking lot.

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I don’t know what specific statute you were charged with regarding the “profane language.” So, I cannot address the specific elements that a prosecutor will need to show or how you might rebut them. However, you admit to using profanity, it was a public place, where children were present, and an environment where such language would be inappropriate and likely to offend others.

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Quoting Ignorant 2 Law Need Help

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The Officer REFUSED 2 give me a field test breath blood or urine test. Nor did the magistrate or jail officers.

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There is a good reason for the officer’s refusal. The reason is that there is no such thing as a field blood or urine test for alcohol or drugs. Blood has to be drawn by a medical professional. Urine has to be collected in a controlled and private environment. In most states, law enforcement cannot compel collection of either without a warrant. Once the samples are collected, they have to be tested in a professional laboratory. It is NOT something that can be done “in the field.” Even breath tests (which can be performed in the field, although with limited admissibility as evidence in court) can only test for alcohol, not drugs in the person’s system.

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Quoting Ignorant 2 Law Need Help

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B/c he said my Pupils were "pin sized” It was daylight, I had 0 sunglasses & I was crying.

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That may be the totality of what the officer told you as to his/her probable cause to arrest you for being under the influence. However, it is unlikely that is all that will be in his/her report or what he/she will testify to in court. Believe it or not, cops are actually trained to recognize visible symptoms of drug use and many are experienced in articulating those observations. The cop would be able to take the ambient light into account regarding your pupil size and your emotional state would have nothing to do with it. Crying does not make pupils constrict.

Without knowing what the officer’s actual official statement says regarding his reasons for concluding that you were under the influence, it is impossible to give an opinion as to how strong the state’s case may be for that charge. The cop may be a trained and experienced drug recognition expert (in which case, you are likely toast) or may be inexperienced and/or poorly trained and overreached on that charge (in which case your attorney might just tear him/her up on the stand).

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Quoting Ignorant 2 Law Need Help

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My X is not being "called" as a witness 2 this court hearing. TIA 4 advice!

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Well, if even your own attorney does not want to call him/her as a defense witness, there is likely a reason. When you meet with your attorney, ask him/her what that reason is.

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Quoting PTPD22

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This incident was so over the top that at least one person felt compelled to call the police to intervene and MULTIPLE people were willing to stick around at give statements to the police who responded.

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If the ball game was still going on when the officer arrived, then the spectators were sticking around probably just to watch the game. There is no evidence that the game was over and that the spectators stuck around just because they felt so strongly about the situation that they had to give the police officer their viewpoints.

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And, you engaged in this sordid behavior at a youth sporting event!

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She was attacked! And she defended herself! What else do you want her to do?

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Quoting TechWorker

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If the ball game was still going on when the officer arrived, then the spectators were sticking around probably just to watch the game. There is no evidence that the game was over and that the spectators stuck around just because they felt so strongly about the situation that they had to give the police officer their viewpoints.

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You are correct, your scenario is possible. However, just as you point out about my assumptions, there is no evidence in OP’s post to support that the game was still going on, either. But, she did mention that the incident occurred in the parking lot, not inside the sports venue where spectators watching the game would be.

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Quoting TechWorker

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She was attacked! And she defended herself! What else do you want her to do?

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OP never claimed she was “attacked.” She said she was “grabbed.” Now, that term could be interpreted to include a variety of actions. However, a person with whom she has a personal relationship taking hold of her arm does not strike me as necessarily meaning an assault that justifies the use of force in self defense. You are accusing me of making assumptions. But, so far, you are making even more. In my experience, a person wishing to simply escape an unwanted touching, moves AWAY. They do not move “straight up” or swing TOWARDS the offending person. Those are aggressive moves, not instinctive or reflexive escape movements.

Just ignore TechWorker - he seems to be a troll.

This is what I found for Virginia statutes on profane language:
http://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/18.2-427/

It seems to be mainly over public airways for those statutes.

There's this one: http://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/18.2-388/

And lots of articles from 2013 and 2015 about how Virginia made it illegal to curse in public.

The cop felt there was probable cause to arrest you. So he did. That doesn't mean you're convicted. You're just charged. Now it depends on the judge.

Perhaps don't have arguments at your kid's sporting events...

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Quoting qwaspolk69

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Perhaps don't have arguments at your kid's sporting events...

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What is so sacred about a kid's sporting event? Does the First Amendment not apply to that kind of event?

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Quoting TechWorker

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What is so sacred about a kid's sporting event? Does the First Amendment not apply to that kind of event?

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It's not that it is sacred, it's that adults are supposed to set a good example for kids. Acting like a foul mouthed brat because you can't control your temper is the opposite of that.

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Quoting TechWorker

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What is so sacred about a kid's sporting event? Does the First Amendment not apply to that kind of event?

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You're truly ignorant if you believe the First Amendment allows you say/do whatever you want in public. And you're in for a very rude awakening when you're being dragged away by your arresting officer screaming "I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA?!"

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Quoting PTPD22

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You are correct, your scenario is possible. However, just as you point out about my assumptions, there is no evidence in OP’s post to support that the game was still going on, either. But, she did mention that the incident occurred in the parking lot, not inside the sports venue where spectators watching the game would be.



OP never claimed she was “attacked.” She said she was “grabbed.” Now, that term could be interpreted to include a variety of actions. However, a person with whom she has a personal relationship taking hold of her arm does not strike me as necessarily meaning an assault that justifies the use of force in self defense. You are accusing me of making assumptions. But, so far, you are making even more. In my experience, a person wishing to simply escape an unwanted touching, moves AWAY. They do not move “straight up” or swing TOWARDS the offending person. Those are aggressive moves, not instinctive or reflexive escape movements.

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I disagree with the last part of your post. If you have ever had your arm grabbed where you pulled it away try to remember...people tend to rotate their arms up when they are trying to pull their arm away from someone, and if they are standing more or less towards the side of the person who has grabbed their arm it would be very easy to knock someone's glasses off...particularly if the person was not a great deal taller than you. So to me, its totally plausible that she knocked his glasses off pulling her arm away.

To me it is possible that this x grabbed her arm to keep her from striking him. We just don't have enough info to call this. OP needs a GOOD lawyer! Needs to let that lawyer do all the talking. All this drama and hyperbole doesn't trend well for her chances of being believed in court.