Re: Help, Ex Wife is Stalling, Won't Talk to Me
That one is easy - and that's not me being snarky.
Give HER contact information - whatever it is, whatever it might be, wherever she might be staying - to YOUR attorney. Your stress level will decrease by several levels. Your attorney will be very familiar with unhappy, unwilling and unwitting spouses and dealing with them is exactly what you're paying them to do.
It's good that the current timeshare is working for you, because it does establish a pattern and you might also want to think about filing a temporary custody order since those are far more likely to become permanent and then everyone knows where they are and what they're meant to be doing. Ways you can help your attorney? Come up with a parenting plan - include holidays and silly things like who is responsible for pickup and drop off, and the actual time of day each period begins/ends.
If you want to see some parenting plan suggestions, deltabravo.net has some but it appears that you're doing pretty well by yourself.
Does that help at all?
Re: Help, Ex Wife is Stalling, Won't Talk to Me
Have you considered even for a second that she doesn't actually have an attorney for you to contact? That maybe she filled out and filed that paperwork on her own or used a paralegal service? It sounds like you've been very kind to her financially and gone above and beyond what is your LEGAL obligation without a court order. I'd end the gravy train. Especially if you are now the primary custodial parent. I'm betting she has a "friend" who's knows the system and is guiding her through it.
You situation had just gotten very complicated and with children involved, you have MUST have a lawyer ASAP. And I must agree, I wouldn't bring up her basket of relationship or yours. As parents, it only makes you both look like you personal needs come before the children. It doesn't matter if your relationship is AMAZING, these children are in the middle of a messy divorce and your focus as a parent should be on their needs and theirs alone at least until your divorce is final. Shacking up 7 months after a 12 year marriage is fast. Obviously mom is a loose cannon so it's up to you to give them stability, security and 100% of your focus. Are you still working those long hours? While you're at work are your kids with your GF? If yes, then it's not much different than mom pawning them off on her time. Neither of you are "parenting" so be very careful how you word anything in your court documents. She can and probably will, twist everything around.