How to Reduce Parenting Time or Get an Order to Require Drug Testing
My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Florida My ex husband is currently on 5 year probation due to a domestic violence offense which was negotiated down after a 2 yr battle in court. He was a severely habitual marijuana user and frequently used cocaine. I say WAS because he swore he quit and was repeatedly tested by probation during the 2 year battle and was clean. He was unable to see me or our child due to a RO for this offence during this time. He re-married during this time (but is now separated) He reestablished visitation and things started well but at this point he seems to be falling short on his responsibilities.
We have a nine year old child on the high functioning end of the ASD scale who also has moderate ADHD and severe allergies..both food and environmental. He is mainstreamed school and has functioned very well up until recently with a great deal of early intervention at home and through private means.
Lately I think my ex is making bad choices and placing our child at risk in different ways. First, he has admittedly neglected to give our child his allergy medication during his visitation weekends. He is unwilling to make sure our child’s schoolwork is completed when he is there (our current agreement states all school work is to be completed). He has brought our child to school late almost 40 % of the time following the weekend visitations. His grades are slipping and his behavior has not been good following these visits.
Our child thrives with a structured routine (which my ex is completedly aware of) and although I am not trying to dictate everything that happens when he is there, I do feel there are some basic steps he can make. My son is frequently up unsupervised until all hours of the night, even on school nights, and practices zero personal hygiene when he’s there. My ex has admitted to associating with a convicted felon, who also has multiple drug arrests, while our child was with him…and he has left our child with workmen doing work at his mother’s home.
I ran into him at a local store during this time. He looked like he was high and I asked him where our child was. He recently has become very argumentative and quick to temper…which were always signs of his drug use. He has been trash talking me to our child as well. I have one message that was accidentally left on my phone (he thought my son hung up) where he basically trash talks me the whole time. Some of the comments and questions our child has been asking leads me to believe he is trying to alienate me. He currently has 30 % time sharing and I was wondering if I have any grounds to either reduce this visitation, request supervised visits, and/or have him drug tested. I cannot afford to hire an attorney and don't qualify for legal aid so trying to get some info before I max out my credit fighting a potentially losing battle. Thank you in advance for any assistance.
Re: How to Reduce Parenting Time or Get an Order to Require Drug Testing
Go and talk to an attorney. Yours is not a simple "yes" or "no" question, and there are obviously some complicating factors. Expect an opposing attorney to ask you why, at 9, your son cannot take care of basic personal hygiene. Stuff like that.
Re: How to Reduce Parenting Time or Get an Order to Require Drug Testing
Quote:
Quoting
Dogmatique
Go and talk to an attorney. Yours is not a simple "yes" or "no" question, and there are obviously some complicating factors. Expect an opposing attorney to ask you why, at 9, your son cannot take care of basic personal hygiene. Stuff like that.
9 could be a bit young to be fully responsible for personal hygiene. I know that my 9 year old (soon to be 10) granddaughter isn't yet at the stage where she gets in the shower without being told to do so. She also needs help making sure that her long hair is properly rinsed. Of course that is not a problem that a boy is likely to have.
Re: How to Reduce Parenting Time or Get an Order to Require Drug Testing
He is on the autism spectrum. (ASD) He CAN complete his personal hygiene but needs to be told "use the restroom before you get into the shower", "take a shower", "brush your teeth" and not all at once...as individual steps. Its just part of raising him. He has to have that intervention to get it done..so if he doesn't get told to do it...he wont. Yes, there's definitely complicating factors. I was trying to see if I even have any grounds at this point before I have to pay for an attorney again. Some of this is detailed in our last modification...but he's not complying. I appreciate the replies.
Re: How to Reduce Parenting Time or Get an Order to Require Drug Testing
Quote:
Quoting
Aussiewannabe
He is on the autism spectrum. (ASD) He CAN complete his personal hygiene but needs to be told "use the restroom before you get into the shower", "take a shower", "brush your teeth" and not all at once...as individual steps. Its just part of raising him. He has to have that intervention to get it done..so if he doesn't get told to do it...he wont. Yes, there's definitely complicating factors. I was trying to see if I even have any grounds at this point before I have to pay for an attorney again. Some of this is detailed in our last modification...but he's not complying. I appreciate the replies.
The bolded is why you need to at least speak to an attorney. You do not know what is and isn't important. The fact that he is not complying with the court order is more significant than anything else you told us, yet you did not mention it until your second post. You need the back and forth of a conversation with someone who is sitting right in front of you, and who can read your actual court orders.