Motion for Relocation Filed by the Custodial Parent

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Quoting Wildcat2015

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Thank you for that information. I know courts used to always be pro-mom and more are starting to favor the Dad, it's just tough feeling like the under dog going in. My daughter has said many times she would love to go to school with her brother, my stepson, but then again she is only 7 and I am sure they don't take what she would like into consideration at this age.

Husband is definitely voluntarily taking this job. Nobody ordered him from the national guard, he simply wants to get however many years he needs to get with them so that he can keep his pension/retirement plan and I don't think that's fair to myself to remove her from me to benefit stepdads retirement plan. Yes, this should also increase his current pay, but like I said before, they own a business in their current city and are not hurting, whatsoever, for money.

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He can accumulate those years without having to leave the State ...

My attorney will be back from vacation on Tuesday and I plan to ask him all questions necessary and can hope he has some good news that we have even a small chance in court with this. Mom will go from working now in their business here to being a stay at home mom. They are moving simply so StepDad can work for the National Guard.

How does to allow a relocation so that a stepparent who has no legal duty to support this child, can enhance his pension plan for his down the road benefit in any way benefit the child ?

Let him commute back and forth for two years if its that geat a deal for him?

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Quoting Dogmatique

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Dad, Kentucky's relocation laws have changed in the past few years. Before, it was extremely difficult for the NCP to block a moveaway; he'd usually have to show that the move was not being made in good faith, and that his parenting time would be severely curtailed.

This has changed somewhat, and now an NCP with shared parenting - and that would be you! - isn't required to prove those two things. It's still not a slamdunk for the NCP, but at least it's no longer a slamdunk for the relocating parent (which was generally the case). "Best interest" is now the standard.



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Here's what I'm seeing in your situation. I'm seeing a parent who is dangling the "it's only for a couple of years" carrot, knowing fine well that once this move goes ahead, there is literally nothing you can do to prevent the child from being relocated again.

The biggest red flag to me though is the National Guard issue. NG members are not commonly PCS'd and when it does happen it's generally due to specialized training/extended schooling and it's very short term. Because of this, you need to make it crystal clear that he does not have a job waiting for him.


Get thee to your attorney immediately.

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The problem is that they already live 100 miles apart therefore the child will be uprooted no matter what. So, once again its back to what will disrupt the child's life the least...moving with her primary caretaker, or moving AND being separated from her primary caretaker.

I would be giving the same advice if the genders were reversed.

Primary caregiver or not, I am her Father, not a stranger to her. We have a great relationship and home life. I have never missed any time with her, never missed a child support payment, and have been to all school events she has had. I don't have to see her every day to still play a large role in her development. Her and I are extremely close and as the saying goes, she is a typical "Daddy's girl" and this will emotional hurt her greatly. I get that mom is primary caregiver, but I still believe that living with her father over moving every 2 years is much more in her benefit. Whether the courts agree or not, to me, it's common sense. My house, our neighborhood, her friends and family are here in kentucky. She is going somewhere where she will have zero family support and won't be familiar with anything.
I understand what you are saying, I just have to disagree that primary caregiver always wins.

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Quoting Wildcat2015

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Primary caregiver or not, I am her Father, not a stranger to her. We have a great relationship and home life. I have never missed any time with her, never missed a child support payment, and have been to all school events she has had. I don't have to see her every day to still play a large role in her development. Her and I are extremely close and as the saying goes, she is a typical "Daddy's girl" and this will emotional hurt her greatly. I get that mom is primary caregiver, but I still believe that living with her father over moving every 2 years is much more in her benefit. Whether the courts agree or not, to me, it's common sense. My house, our neighborhood, her friends and family are here in kentucky. She is going somewhere where she will have zero family support and won't be familiar with anything.
I understand what you are saying, I just have to disagree that primary caregiver always wins.

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Well, unfortunately the courts and the law don't necessarily agree with you. Like I said before, if you lived in the same community as mom I believe you would have a much better shot at it than you have now.

I understand that you feel that it would hurt her greatly to be that far of a distance away from you. However, have you tried to put yourself in her shoes and imagine whether it would be worse or better for her to be that far of a distance away from mom?

It is not appropriate to involve children in adult matters but I do think that any time a parent has to deal with an issue like this that they need to try as hard as possible to imagine it from the child's point of view, all directions, and to imagine what would really be best for their child. Obviously the very best thing for this child would be if no move were to happen at all. However, it does not appear that that is a realistic outcome.

All things being equal (both parents good parents) it has to be based on what is truly best for that individual child. So, we know that the child's life is going to be disrupted for sure...because one way or another she is going to be moving. What the judge will have to decide is which thing will be the least disruptive for her.

Whatever you do, do not limit your case to just being a challenge of the move. You need to also address parenting time and transportation. Make sure that what you design for you (should you lose) is the same plan that you would offer to her.

She is quitting work to move...how does that benefit child....next she may petition for a change in CS?

I grew up in part a military brat...parent was assigned to some far off places...not always popular with spouse ...sometimes parents lived apart and some of my current friends in teaching, medicine, mainstream corporations maintain commuter / long distance marriages....not everyone's cup of tea but there is no rule against a commuter marriage ...and so far we don't have much to support why stepfathers relocation means child is better off to move with step father....for a mere 2 +/- years and be disrupted yet again.

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Quoting llworking

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The problem is that they already live 100 miles apart therefore the child will be uprooted no matter what. So, once again its back to what will disrupt the child's life the least...moving with her primary caretaker, or moving AND being separated from her primary caretaker.

I would be giving the same advice if the genders were reversed.

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You've just made my point, actually.

She's going to move, either way. Hence the disruption. So, given that Kentucky doesn't appear to think too much of a "husband-kinda-sorta-maybe-has-a-job-9-hours-away-what-do-you-mean-he-can-get-a-job-locally" reason, I see nothing indicating that Dad would be a bad choice for custodial parent. The child knows the area, it's familiar home-ground for her. As Dad indicated, she'll know absolutely nobody and have no ties to the new location. Why not leave her where she's at least comfortable? Less traumatic, yes?

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Quoting Dogmatique

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You've just made my point, actually.

She's going to move, either way. Hence the disruption. So, given that Kentucky doesn't appear to think too much of a "husband-kinda-sorta-maybe-has-a-job-9-hours-away-what-do-you-mean-he-can-get-a-job-locally" reason, I see nothing indicating that Dad would be a bad choice for custodial parent. The child knows the area, it's familiar home-ground for her. As Dad indicated, she'll know absolutely nobody and have no ties to the new location. Why not leave her where she's at least comfortable? Less traumatic, yes?

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Completely agree and that's my point in all of this. Yes, I understand she will be leaving her Mom, but unfortunately this is a chance her Mom decided to take and I don't have to agree with it. I am simply stating that if we are looking for less disruption, it seems that keeping her in a familiar location, within an hour of ALL family members (other than mom), some right down the road, would be more beneficial. I would even be willing to set up some sort of visitation once a month for her extended family on her moms side who live a few hours away so that she still
Maintains those relationships. I am not at all trying to be difficult with the mother, I just will
Not accept that her moving somewhere, being homeschooled when she loves school and is a social butterfly, and moving somewhere with zero family when she has myself, my wife, her brother and soon to be sibling on the way, along with all of her family and extended family. I want her to have a stable and happy home and I know she has that here.

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Quoting Dogmatique

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You've just made my point, actually.

She's going to move, either way. Hence the disruption. So, given that Kentucky doesn't appear to think too much of a "husband-kinda-sorta-maybe-has-a-job-9-hours-away-what-do-you-mean-he-can-get-a-job-locally" reason, I see nothing indicating that Dad would be a bad choice for custodial parent. The child knows the area, it's familiar home-ground for her. As Dad indicated, she'll know absolutely nobody and have no ties to the new location. Why not leave her where she's at least comfortable? Less traumatic, yes?

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It depends entirely on the child as to which would be the least traumatic. That is my entire point. That is the decision the judge will have to make.
Mom of course will make the argument that being separated from her primary caregiver would be more traumatic...and its a very plausible argument. It all depends on what is best for THAT individual child.

Dad, you also have to be careful about something. Your stepson is not your child's brother. He is your child's stepbrother. That may seem unimportant in the overall course of things but its one of those little things that can lessen your credibility in court. Does she have any actual siblings at mom's? If she does, that would factor in as well.