Can My Mom Allow Me to Be Emancipated

My question involves juvenile law in the State of: Iowa
I am 16 years old and am about 4 months pregnant. I moved out of my moms house with my fiancé and I find it hard to do simple things like fill prescriptions, go to the doctors office, sign up for a library card, etc. without my mom present with me. We live about an hour and a half away from each other so it's hard to do those things because of the distance. Anyway, I've talked it over with my mom and she said she would allow me to get emancipated if the decision were up to her. But neither of us know if it is or not. So could she allow me to? Or would I be better off marrying him before the baby comes so then I'm automatically emancipated?

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I also have a good paying job that I've had for over a year. I make about $600 every two weeks.

are you in school and working?

https://coolice.legis.iowa.gov/Cool-...=83&input=232C

Also, what about a minor getting married in the state of Iowa with parental consent? Would that automatically make me emancipated?

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Quoting madzter69

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My question involves juvenile law in the State of: Iowa
I am 16 years old and am about 4 months pregnant. I moved out of my moms house with my fiancé and I find it hard to do simple things like fill prescriptions, go to the doctors office, sign up for a library card, etc. without my mom present with me. We live about an hour and a half away from each other so it's hard to do those things because of the distance. Anyway, I've talked it over with my mom and she said she would allow me to get emancipated if the decision were up to her. But neither of us know if it is or not. So could she allow me to? Or would I be better off marrying him before the baby comes so then I'm automatically emancipated?

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I also have a good paying job that I've had for over a year. I make about $600 every two weeks.

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I'm appalled that your Mother has allowed this. That is, to be blunt, lousy parenting. But enough about that.

There is a reason I'm asking this question, okay? Where is your other parent? Where else are you getting funds?

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Quoting madzter69

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Also, what about a minor getting married in the state of Iowa with parental consent? Would that automatically make me emancipated?

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Unfortunately, yes.

My dad left when I was a baby, and my older sister helps out my mom. I buy everything for myself, my sister just helps out my mom. My mom gets food stamps for me and her and occasionally watches kids. That's her sole source of income. And no, I am not in school. Going to school gave me extremely bad anxiety to the point where I would just constantly throw up for hours. Since I cannot afford online schooling, I've decided to get my GED and have been studying since I turned 16.

For some reason I really feel for you. You're 16, and you're in a very vulnerable position. May I offer some non-legal advice? Slow down. Talk to your boyfriend about the possibility of adoption. If you're dead set against that, then you need to focus on you and the baby - you have to make sure you're both healthy.

You're not in school, and you're working how many hours? Because even if you're emancipated, child labor laws still apply. (It seems that there are changes being made or discussed ... next week! http://www.iowaworkforce.org/labor/childlabor.htm ).

What are you going to do when you've given birth? You're prone to anxiety, which I understand (I'm officially agoraphobic), so what's going to happen when you're juggling a baby and money?

I really don't want to come down hard on you, but I can't help but worry that emancipation may make your situation worse.

I'd also like to ask - $600 every two weeks may sound like good money when you're 16, but when you get out in the real world you're going to find that's peanuts. How do you plan to pay a hospital bill that is going to run into thousands of dollars? Does this good job have health insurance? If you're emancipated, your mom does not have any legal obligation to pay anything towards your support, or your medical care. And believe me, $300 a week isn't even going to scratch the surface. ONLY your income will be considered in an emancipation petition - not your boyfriend's. Yours alone. The judge will want to be sure that you won't become a burden on the taxpayers if the two of you break up, and while I know you don't believe me, all you have to do is read a few of these forums to learn that the odds of you remaining together aren't very good.

We really don't want to give the baby up. I'm not necessarily a big fan of kids, but I know I'll love them if they're my own. I work about 8 hours a day 6 days a week and have a few thousand in savings. Once I have the baby, I was planning on taking time off, for the baby, and myself, give time to adjust. And my savings will make up for those lost wages. His mom will take 2 weeks off when it's born to help me out since he most likely won't be able to. I understand that with emancipation, you have to go in front of a judge and he has to approve it. If he and I were to get married we could skip that part. I'm pretty confident he's the one I want to be with forever, but no I don't know for sure. But I don't think anyone really does. It would just be easier to be able to do things on my own. I couldn't even get a stupid library card until I talked to the manager and explained my situation. Yes, he and I could go a few more years just as boyfriend/girlfriend but it's not really practical when you have a baby, live a ways away from your mom, and need to get things done. Things a minor can't do by themselves.

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No, $600 isn't very much, but truth be told, my mom couldn't even help me pay bills if she wanted to. Her income is basically zero. I pay her bills, not the other way around, I pay her phone and internet bill. I have insurance through the state that will remain because of my income, age, and pregnant/have a child under 18. But $1200 a month is plenty enough around here to pay rent, phone bill, necessities, and stuff for baby without even his help.

And a hospital bill?

Though I do feel for the OP, truth be told this is very simple. The court isn't going to emancipate her. Put her in foster care? Perhaps. Leave her where she is? Perhaps. But emancipation? Nope.

My insurance takes care of all my medical bills. And why would they put me in foster care?

You're not in school. You have serious emotional issues. You're pregnant. Your mother is not taking adequate care of you. Shall I continue?

Your situation is common. What happens if you and boyfriend break up, you lose your job and have no savings and can't find another job? Have you checked the cost of daycare? What happens when the child is SSI k and daycare won't take him or her ? How many days can you miss work before you lose your job? Things rarely go as we plan, especially when children are involved?

It's legal to drop out of school at 16 years old. Also the age of consent is 16 years old. And once you're 16, you can move out. Your parent doesn't have to support you if you choose to move out. I also go to therapy for my issues. So I don't see why they would put me in foster care. There are plenty of other kids that are way worse than I am. Why waste their time on me when I'm just fine on my own.

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I understand that, but my boss only has 1 other assistant manager, she couldn't afford to fire me even if I didn't come in for a week. I also know her personally and she knows my situation. When my baby is sick, I will probably have my grandma watch them. And I qualify for daycare assistance.

Honey, go back and read your own post, and then come back and tell me all the reasons you are NOT just fine.

At least I'm trying. I didn't get an abortion because I was worried I couldn't handle it. I'm worried all the time. But that doesn't mean I'm not gonna try. Sure, I'm gonna struggle. But that's what makes a person. A person who has gone through life without struggling, searching the cushions for change, is probably a pretty shitty human being to be honest. Because some of the best parents I know, had their babies this young, and they were good parents. When my mom had me, she was 38, had cancer, arthritis, etc. I had a shit childhood because my mom couldn't play with me because her knees hurt, couldn't spend time with me because she was constantly in the hospital, and when I do see her since I've moved out, I'm usually cleaning her shit off the floor because she can't make it to the bathroom. That's why I will be a good mother to my kid. Because I know what it's like to have parents that aren't really there. I talked to my dad once when I was 3 and that's all I remember of him. And that's also why I have issues. So I'm gonna make for damn sure that my boyfriend is gonna be in this kids life no matter what. Just because people have money and are set, doesn't mean they'll be good parents.

Sweetheart, please listen.

You're vulnerable, and you're in a difficult situation. The volunteers here are all in agreement - the court will not emancipate you, and for several different reasons. Sure, you have hopes, and dreams, but you're not being realistic. Your boyfriend? He's free to leave and never see the child - nobody can ever force him to do that.

You're not ready for this. You're going to go ahead and do it anyway, but I can guarantee that you'e going to be back at some point wanting to know how to enforce child support, or move out of state, or any one of a number of situations you might face.

And that's not even touching on the fact that you can't support yourself without government help.... (in other words, we - the taxpayers - will be supporting you and your child).

Do you see where we're coming from?

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Sigh. It's not about "trying". The court doesn't give a flying ferret fart about you "trying". The court wants you to be "DOING", and you're not able to do that by yourself.

Yeah, I got that. I pretty much gave up on the whole emancipation thing. I'm probably just gonna get married. Thanks for the advice though.

*facepalm*

Ah well. Can't say we didn't try.

Good luck, for you and the baby.

Even with a job and a child, you can't rent an apartment, get utilities in your name, you can't enter into a legally binding contract. You will be responsible for your child, but you can't be held responsible for yourself. This whole situation is so sad for you and your child.

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Quoting madzter69

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It's legal to drop out of school at 16 years old. Also the age of consent is 16 years old. And once you're 16, you can move out. Your parent doesn't have to support you if you choose to move out. I also go to therapy for my issues. So I don't see why they would put me in foster care. There are plenty of other kids that are way worse than I am. Why waste their time on me when I'm just fine on my own.

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I understand that, but my boss only has 1 other assistant manager, she couldn't afford to fire me even if I didn't come in for a week. I also know her personally and she knows my situation. When my baby is sick, I will probably have my grandma watch them. And I qualify for daycare assistance.

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Uh... no. Not quite. You can only leave home if you have CONSENT or you're emancipated. You are still a minor, under someone else's care, right up until you're 18 in your state.

God, this is going to be a bloody disaster. If you love that child, consider adoption. SERIOUSLY.

This little miss is going to be in for a very rude awakening when real life catches up with her.

I am not at all sure things are as they seem. And mom's going to let her income (minor, household member for food stamps) go, and the caretaker for her, and it sounds like the only source of income in this family. And it's sort of sad to hear that she thinks, at 16, that she's vitally necessary to her job and they won't fire her when she "takes a little time off" to give birth. I'd bet she's on Medicaid, too, and that's another kettle of fish. Just really sad. And since she couldn't hack regular high school, there's not much access to anyone who could help her or advise her. Another potential lifetime of public assistance and a damaged next generation.

High school dropouts don't get good paying jobs with benefits. You can even sign papers when you go into the hospital for L&D because you're not 18. So your mom, unless you're married, has to sign medical consent papers.

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Quoting Mercy&Grace

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High school dropouts don't get good paying jobs with benefits. You can even sign papers when you go into the hospital for L&D because you're not 18. So your mom, unless you're married, has to sign medical consent papers.

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No she doesn't - a pregnant minor is considered medically emancipated. This does not mean she's emancipated for any other reason or purpose, just as far as her pregnancy and healthcare go.

Dogmatique, Thank you. She won't be able to get medical care for herself after the baby, unless her mother signs or she gets married. But, this is all her choice.

Chances are she is still living at home and maybe planning on quitting school and getting a pretend job that pays good even though she is a high school drop out.

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Quoting Mercy&Grace

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Dogmatique, Thank you. She won't be able to get medical care for herself after the baby, unless her mother signs or she gets married. But, this is all her choice.

Chances are she is still living at home and maybe planning on quitting school and getting a pretend job that pays good even though she is a high school drop out.

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I know it's wishful thinking on my part, but I hope she actually recognizes the situation for what it is. I think you know where I'm coming from.

Dogmatique, I understand where you're coming from
Having lived for many, many years is a huge education. Unfortunately, I'm afraid the OP thinks she has the wisdom of experience and she doesn't.