Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

My question involves name change laws in the State of: NY (County of Westchester)

Hello,

I want to change my daughter's first and middle name, making the first name her middle name and the usage name her first name. I have all the documents from the court but wanted to know how likely it might be that the change will be granted. My daughter first name was given out of fear.. Her father was very abusive and threatened to give no support if I didn't give her that name.

Now 4 years later he gives no child support and plays mind games with us. He will see her once in a few months. This leaves her heartbroken and asking for a man that doesn't care for her. He is a true narcissist. My daughter would come back after these random visits emotionally torn. So torn she would hold her bowels for days. I wanted her to have a relationship with him but it is not healthy with his narcissistic personality.

I just want to use the usage name because that is all she knows and he never even calls her by her legal name. He has dissapeared again for months. Child support dismissed his case with prejudice as well.

Thanks for any advice.

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Quoting mmsv2010

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My question involves name change laws in the State of: NY (County of Westchester)

Hello,

I want to change my daughter's first and middle name, making the first name her middle name and the usage name her first name. I have all the documents from the court but wanted to know how likely it might be that the change will be granted. My daughter first name was given out of fear.. Her father was very abusive and threatened to give no support if I didn't give her that name.

Now 4 years later he gives no child support and plays mind games with us. He will see her once in a few months. This leaves her heartbroken and asking for a man that doesn't care for her. He is a true narcissist. My daughter would come back after these random visits emotionally torn. So torn she would hold her bowels for days. I wanted her to have a relationship with him but it is not healthy with his narcissistic personality.

I just want to use the usage name because that is all she knows and he never even calls her by her legal name. He has dissapeared again for months. Child support dismissed his case with prejudice as well.

Thanks for any advice.

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There are many, many people in this world who go by their middle names as far as common usage is concerned...with many adults even signing their name as (for example) B Jane Doe, rather than Betty J Doe. While I can understand you wanting to change her name, its really not a critical thing for your daughter.

Your arguments don't show that the change is in the best interest of the child which is the requirement. Further, unless you have a notarized written statement from the other parent authorizing the changed, you'll have to serve them notice (by someone other than you and the server will need to file a sworn affidavit). It's near impossible if the other parent objects, by the way.

Thank you for the advice. I plan on having it served to him at his last known address he doesn't let anyone know where he lives currently. I want to try regardless if they deny. My daughter is going to keep his last name so I feel what more should he want from me. She should be able to use the name that those that care about use.
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To the other poster I don't think she can use the usage name in that way because it isn't part of her name. I want to add it and make the first name her middle name keeping the last name. I want the change because she is starting kindergarten and I want her to spell the name she is called on a daily basis by everyone.

Best to use a process server. There's specific rules for the service.

She can use whatever name she wants. Her legal name requires some compelling reason to why it's in her best interest to change it.

Flyingron, what is a process server? I was told by someone in the legal help dept. of the court to just get it notarized and it could be signed by someone other than me and be mailed to his last known addresss. I just want to do this correctly. Thanks.

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Sorry, so I can have her use the usage name in school? I know they require the children to spell their name. So she can spell the usage name instead of the legal one?

What I don't think you're getting is that even if she was christened Hermione Valency Hepplewhite, you can call her Sally if you want to. Even in school.

A process server is one trained in complying with the service requirements. Just notarizing it and mailing is insufficient.
The fact you don't know this indicates you need professional help.

Child support issue was dismissed with prejudice?

What issue was that exactly?

Thank you cbg, I didn't know that cause at daycare they make her spell her legal name not the name we use. They said they couldn't do it because it wasn't her real name.

Flyingron, thank you for the clarification. I was advised by legal help that I can not serve but anyone else can and that it could be mailed because it was listed as an option on the form. Does it cost to use a process server?

Dogmatique, sorry I believe it was dismissed with prejudice not without. The court said they werenunable to locate him for the past 2 years at the address I know he was residing for that time. That is his mother's address. When I went there one time the chilsupport mail was opened on the table so I know he ignores them. His sister also saw this and told me on a separate occasion. I stressed to the court that he did live there and still nothing was done.