Police Wouldn't Charge a Stepparent With Assaulting an Adult Child

My question involves criminal law for the state of: Florida. On 2-15-15 my mother went to her mother in laws house to retrieve my 5 year old sister. There is no custody agreement in place and she is still married to my step father. Her attorney advised her that as long as she had my sister in her custody she could not be forced to return her to my stepfather (Just like he had done the previous month to my mother when he fled from Alaska to Florida with my sister). Anyways, long story short my mother and step father fought. After they all calmed down I said something (honestly don't remember what exactly) and my step father got very angry. He ran up to me and started pushing me. He pushed his face against mine and screamed at me to get off of "his" property. I told him that it was not his property, that it was his parents and his mother gave me permission to be there. He continued to scream and push me backwards until his mother finally screamed at him to stop. I recorded the entire incident on my phone. When the police came they arrested my mother (her charges were child abuse) but did not say a single word to me at the scene. I left and went to the sheriff's office to press charges against my stepfather. The sheriff's office was closed but said they would have a deputy call me. The deputy who called me was the Sgt who showed up first at the scene (and was very hostile towards my mother from the moment he arrived). I then told him I wanted to press charges and he literally laughed. He said "you are lucky I didn't charge you with kidnapping, I will not let you press charges against Jason (yes they are on first name basis in this small town) and I will not allow any of my deputies to let you press charges either". I then asked to speak with his supervisor and he again laughed. Then told me, "I am the supervisor". I said, "well, even if you are I'm sure there is someone above you". He then told me I could *try* to contact his Leutnant. He did not give me his Leutnants name or number. He told me that I could call the sheriff's office number and ask for him. My question is, can I seriously not press charges against my stepfather? He is also a deputy, but this is not the first time he has pushed me. Everything was on video (which the sheriff office has had for 3 weeks and refuses to answer my calls about returning my phone) on my cell phone. I just want to know if and how to pursue this. I've let him get away with it before and I refuse to continue that cycle.

Your father is a deputy, and his fellow deputies will not arrest him. And you are surprised?

Here's the bottom line: The deputies will not do anything. You can try to talk to the county prosecutor. If that doesn't work, try the state attorney general's office.

You sound like a snot trying to encourage parental assault. When you did not get that you are trying for something desperately. You wanted a confrontation with a parent child, you got one. It is a parent that has the right to get in your face and yell at you. Next time, try it with a stranger. Stay out of adult situations child.

Go to your local State Trooper Barracks and file a complaint with them.

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Quoting hackett4

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On 2-15-15 my mother went to her mother in laws house to retrieve my 5 year old sister. There is no custody agreement in place and she is still married to my step father. Her attorney advised her that as long as she had my sister in her custody she could not be forced to return her to my stepfather (Just like he had done the previous month to my mother when he fled from Alaska to Florida with my sister).

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Okay... so there's quite a background story, here. Are you stating that your mother and stepfather were living in Alaska, they separated, dad took the child with him to Florida, and your mother decided that she could go to Florida, go to his mother's home, and take the child from him against his will because there was no custody order? That for some reason her lawyer thought that would be a better idea than going to court and actually getting a custody order requiring the return of the child to Alaska? That it didn't occur to you, your mother or your lawyer that in the absence of a custody order, your stepfather had the same custodial rights as your mother, meaning "[he] could not be forced to return her to [your mother]"?

It's unfortunate that mom didn't go to court.

Why were you there? Do you live in Florida or Alaska?

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Quoting hackett4

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Anyways, long story short my mother and step father fought. After they all calmed down I said something (honestly don't remember what exactly) and my step father got very angry.

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Why isn't it on your video?

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Quoting hackett4

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When the police came they arrested my mother (her charges were child abuse) but did not say a single word to me at the scene.

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Explain the child abuse charge.

Why did you choose not to make a statement to the police when they responded to the scene?

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Quoting hackett4

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My question is, can I seriously not press charges against my stepfather?

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You can speak to the lieutenant. You can speak to the prosecutor's office.

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Quoting hackett4

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He is also a deputy....

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In Alaska? Or is it that your mother was living in Florida with your stepfather, then chose to take the child to Alaska in the hope of preventing him from obtaining custody or visitation, with his following her there to recover the child? Or was she charged with child abuse in Florida, then fled to Alaska with the child to avoid prosecution? The facts matter.

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Quoting hackett4

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Everything was on video (which the sheriff office has had for 3 weeks and refuses to answer my calls about returning my phone) on my cell phone.

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Why do they have your phone?

FHP isn't even going to CONSIDER taking that report. They are going to refer the complainant back to the sheriff's office to bring a formal complaint. OP needs to contact the sheriff's office and speak with internal affairs.

No, I wasn't surprised. I just wanted to make sure there was nothing else I could do before I try and let it go.

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The sheriff's office "seized" my phone as evidence for the video. As soon as the deputies got on the scene I showed them the video of the entire incident (including my stepfather pulling my mother and sister to the ground) and once they had it in their hands they didn't let me touch it again. I was never asked to make a statement at the scene. In fact, it says in the police report that I, along with my husband, refused to make statements but we were never asked to make a statement or given the option to. My mother and step dad lived in Florida. My mother moved to Alaska for a job. After she moved she told my step dad she wanted a divorce. After a few months my step dad moved to Alaska with my sister. Once he was in Alaska my mom kept my sister. She took my sister to see her dad and he took her and flew back to florida. My mother then went to Florida to get my sister and return to alaska.

I have no idea why she was charged with child abuse. The deputy claims that she "mentally abused" my sister because she picked her up and said, "bye" to my step father. After she said bye he grabbed ahold of her and made them fall to the ground. All of this was on the video.

They actually have been going to court for all of this but nothing has been decided yet. They had a date set for mediation but neither had been granted custody. She knew he could not be forced to give her back but she was told by her attorney that as long as she had my sister in her arms she could not be forced to give her back to him

I agree that it is a huge mess and neither of them have handled it properly. I live in Georgia (husband is army) we went down to Florida to visit my mom when she came from Alaska.
Once she told me what hee attorney said and that she was going to get my sister I told her I was going with her. I wanted to record everything so she would have proof of exactly what happened Instead of it being his word against herS.
Obviously it didn't go the way she had thought but for him to get violent towards me when all I did was record it was unnecessary. She didn't just show up. My step dad invited my mom and myself over to his parents house to visit with my sister.

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He is not my parent. He had NO right to touch me at all. It wasn't only yelling and this isn't the first time. He assaulted me as soon as he decided to put his hands on me. My actual father is a police officer for the city we are from and he himself has never laid a hand on me. So what would give a step-parent (who is going through a divorce with my mother) the right to lay his hands on me? I am not a minor and I no longer live in his household so he has no right to do anything to me. I only went to record the entire incident. I didn't touch him, I didn't touch my sister, I didn't touch anyone. So please explain how he was justified in assaulting me when I did nothing but tell him he was a horrible parent to my sister.

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Quoting hackett4

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As soon as the deputies got on the scene I showed them the video of the entire incident (including my stepfather pulling my mother and sister to the ground) and once they had it in their hands they didn't let me touch it again.... I wanted to record everything so she would have proof of exactly what happened Instead of it being his word against herS.

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Then, we're back to this:

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Quoting hackett4

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Anyways, long story short my mother and step father fought. After they all calmed down I said something (honestly don't remember what exactly) and my step father got very angry.

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You filmed the entire incident, so isn't your statement on your video? What do you think you said?

You are indicating that your stepfather invited you and your mother over to peaceably visit the child. Why didn't you simply do that, instead of scheming with your mother to seize the child forcibly from the house while recording your father's reaction? Did you really think that was a good plan?

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Quoting hackett4

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My mother and step dad lived in Florida. My mother moved to Alaska for a job. After she moved she told my step dad she wanted a divorce. After a few months my step dad moved to Alaska with my sister. Once he was in Alaska my mom kept my sister. She took my sister to see her dad and he took her and flew back to florida. My mother then went to Florida to get my sister and return to alaska.

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So... mom left dad with custody, dad subsequently went to Alaska... to try to reconcile? He took the child to visit mom, mom decided that she was going to keep the child rather than returning her to dad at the end of the visit and, when dad was ultimately able to do so, he ultimately responded in kind, taking the child back to Florida?

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Quoting hackett4

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They actually have been going to court for all of this but nothing has been decided yet.

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The divorce and custody proceedings are pending in which state?

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Quoting hackett4

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They had a date set for mediation but neither had been granted custody. She knew he could not be forced to give her back but she was told by her attorney that as long as she had my sister in her arms she could not be forced to give her back to him

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Are you stating that her attorney specifically told her to go to the place where dad was staying with the child and try to grab the child into her arms, then try to walk out the door with the father knowing that she intended to take the child to Alaska and for the second time deprive him of any access? If so, it sounds like mom needs to get a better lawyer. Child custody cases aren't supposed to be decided by games of tug-of-war, with the child in the middle.

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Quoting hackett4

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My step dad invited my mom and myself over to his parents house to visit with my sister.

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So the invitation was not from his mother -- it was from him and, when you and your mother made it clear that you were there to try to abscond with the child rather than to have a peaceable visit, it was revoked by him. The local police may be regarding you as a trespasser, subject to being ejected through the application of reasonable force when you refused to leave.

She never went inside the house. She was standing outside my sister came out and gave my mom a hug and my mom picked her up. Her attorney made it very clear that she couldn't go inside his residence and try to take her. She literally did the same exact thing he had done the previous month.

Yes he revoked his invitation but his mother (who stood outside for the whole altercation) was telling him it was fine and to leave me alone.

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When she went to Alaska their plan was for him and my sister to follow the next month. Once my mom got there she decided she didn't want to be with my stepfather. Knowing that she was filing for divorce he moved to Alaska so they could "co-parent" and because apparently he thought he could "win her back". Then one weekend when she took my sister to see him he bought a plane ticket within a matter of hours and was gone.

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Quoting hackett4

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She never went inside the house. She was standing outside my sister came out and gave my mom a hug and my mom picked her up. Her attorney made it very clear that she couldn't go inside his residence and try to take her. She literally did the same exact thing he had done the previous month.

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If you're now saying that the lawyer's advice was to pretend to schedule a peaceable visit with the child, lure the child outside of the home, grab the child and run, then... I'm still seeing a lawyer who is a grade-A idiot and who deserves to be fired.

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Quoting hackett4

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When she went to Alaska their plan was for him and my sister to follow the next month. Once my mom got there she decided she didn't want to be with my stepfather. Knowing that she was filing for divorce he moved to Alaska so they could "co-parent" and because apparently he thought he could "win her back".

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Then he took the child over to see mom for a visit, and mom decided that she would keep the child and refuse him access. After some undefined period during which your mother refused him access...

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Quoting hackett4

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Then one weekend when she took my sister to see him he bought a plane ticket within a matter of hours and was gone.

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Your mother so appreciated this approach that she decided to try to do the same thing back to him....

Now there is a divorce and custody proceeding pending in... what state?

In florida. About 8 hours away from where he moved To with his parents.

I don't know what your mother's lawyer was thinking. If she has agreed to jurisdiction in Florida, taking off to Alaska with the child would be apt to trigger a motion in the Florida court asking that the mother be compelled to return the child to the state, that temporary physical custody be granted to the father, and that measures be taken (e.g., supervision) to prevent mom from again absconding with the child -- with a good chance that the court would grant all of that relief.

I honestly don't know. I know they had a court date after all this happened and the judge was upset with both of them for removing her from the county where they filed. That's all I know about it.

I just wanted to know if I could do anything about my stepfather putting his hands on me once again.

Given that it only happened once, when you were involved in a scheme to remove his child out of his custody -- and even then only after you made an inflammatory comment that you don't recall, then refused to leave the property when he instructed you to do so -- I would suggest that if you don't repeat that sort of behavior it's unlikely that there's going to be another incident.

Meanwhile, I suggest trying to contact the lieutenant for a review of the video from your phone, and also to ask about their returning your phone.

And you've been given the answer: the sheriff's office HAS an office that takes complaints on the behavior of their deputies. If you'd like to make such a complaint, that's who you make it to. If their investigation of the incidents concludes that either an internal policy was violated or a criminal law was broken, they'll act accordingly - which could result in anything from a finding of "no foul", to internal discipline to termination and criminal charges. And next time, spend less time taking MOVIES with your phone and more time USING your phone. If you're being assaulted (in Florida it's actually classified as a battery if he put his hands on you), then ACT like you're being battered and call authorities. Prosecutors don't tend to find a lot of credibility in victims who were too busy taking movies to report a criminal action, and especially in cases like this where the air is THICK with the scent of "set up".

My husband was on the phone with the sheriff's office within the first 3 minutes of us arriving at the house. I recorded it to have proof of what my mother did and what he did. My husband was the one who called and had them come to the scene.

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This hasn't happened only once. That's the major issue. He has done this 3 other times that I can remember off the top of my head. I actually moved out because of him putting his hands on me. I never called to report it before because he worked for the county we lived in. He told me I could call but they would never believe my word over his. So, when I knew we were going there, I recorded it all to have proof. He has done this to my 2 other siblings who are also not his children.

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I don't understand how it is trespassing when his mother stood right there and told him it was fine that I was on HER property. She stood there and said it was fine and that she was glad that I was recording it. He said tons of inflammatory comments to me and my mother as well.. But I had enough restraint to stand 10 feet away and not touch him. So how does he have the right to put his hands on me? Again, not his property and the owner of the property gave me permission to stay even after he told me to leave.

Tell it to the lieutenant.