Making a Case for Supervised Visitation

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Nebraska & Indiana

Hello and thank you in advance.

I want to pre-face by saying I will be meeting with a couple different lawyers shortly to discuss this issue. I am basically asking here to get an idea of what answers I should be expecting from them, I do not want to hire someone with "false promises" or one who may not be competent enough, either. I am also going to try to stick to the facts.

Here is the deal, one daughter under the age of 1. Paternity has not been established. Never married.
Father lives long distance (over 500 miles)

I am wondering if I have a case to request supervised visits should the father request some sort of custody or visitation. As of now, nothing has been filed in court. The reasons for wanting supervised visitation is as follows (from most concerning to least):

1. Father has several diagnosed and treated/untreated mental illnesses (above and beyond your average depression or anxiety disorders).
2. Serious substance abuse/addiction
3. Previous threats of violence and kidnapping
4. No previous contact or consideration for child thus far/is a stranger to the child.
5. Inability to co-parent
6. Physical health issues

I do have "proof" of most of these concerns, and will consult with the lawyer I choose about what is admissible, what is relevant, etc. My curiosity here is if anyone has experienced a non custodial parent receiving supervised visitation for these issues, is it reasonable to request supervised visitation due to these issues, and how would that work when the father is long distance?

It's reasonable to request supervision and a graduated plan if Dad has been absent.

The rest will depend on what you can prove - but even then, supervision will only be temporary if he's keeping his hands clean.

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Quoting indianamom1

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My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Nebraska & Indiana

Hello and thank you in advance.

I want to pre-face by saying I will be meeting with a couple different lawyers shortly to discuss this issue. I am basically asking here to get an idea of what answers I should be expecting from them, I do not want to hire someone with "false promises" or one who may not be competent enough, either. I am also going to try to stick to the facts.

Here is the deal, one daughter under the age of 1. Paternity has not been established. Never married.
Father lives long distance (over 500 miles)

I am wondering if I have a case to request supervised visits should the father request some sort of custody or visitation. As of now, nothing has been filed in court. The reasons for wanting supervised visitation is as follows (from most concerning to least):

1. Father has several diagnosed and treated/untreated mental illnesses (above and beyond your average depression or anxiety disorders).
2. Serious substance abuse/addiction
3. Previous threats of violence and kidnapping
4. No previous contact or consideration for child thus far/is a stranger to the child.
5. Inability to co-parent
6. Physical health issues

I do have "proof" of most of these concerns, and will consult with the lawyer I choose about what is admissible, what is relevant, etc. My curiosity here is if anyone has experienced a non custodial parent receiving supervised visitation for these issues, is it reasonable to request supervised visitation due to these issues, and how would that work when the father is long distance?

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With that kind of distance between homes and the father having no previous contact with the child you can expect that it dad does file to establish paternity and parenting time that he will have to start out visiting in your community, on a supervised basis, gradually phasing into visiting in your community on a non-supervised basis, and then phasing into visitation in his community.

If you feel that dad may need to be supervised for more than a period of phased in visitation, then it would probably be best to ask the court to appoint a GAL (Guardian ad litem) to help the judge investigate the best interest of the child.

Thank you for your response. I have a couple questions.
1. How would supervised visits work with the father living across country?
2. What do you mean by "keeping hands clean"? If the father does not get help for his mental illnesses, his substance abuses, etc, would the supervised visitation continue? If supervision is found necessary by the judge, would the father have to fulfill any certain requirements before the supervision requirement being lifted? Like counseling, substance abuse counseling, testing, etc?

In your case, it really should be up to Dad to get his backside to where you reside, and to visit in your locale. See if there are any visitation centers close by.

It's very difficult and not common at all for a parent to be supervised in the long term. Again though, you have the burden of proof. The other thing is that you need to expect Dad to present himself as a sober, drug-free parent and he now realizes where he went wrong and would like the chance to be part of his child's life.

Some parents are very, very good at lying through their teeth, unfortunately.

I believe its unlikely that the father would accept coming to our home or even town to visit. He would either come a couple times and quit, or not at all. If this happens, is there any action I could take to prevent him from coming in and out of her life, before the time she would remember it occurring? Or would that be something we would just have to deal with?

Also in the case of supervised visits, if the father behaved inappropriately or abusive to DD during the visits, what recourse could I take?

I know of one Dad's parenting plan which allows the supervisor to cut short any visit for any level of inappropriate behavior. His plan is also the most restricted I've ever seen outside of an abuse/neglect case though, and the list of things he couldn't do was long. Very long.

I don't think that will happen in your situation, and largely Dad can come and go as he pleases. What you can do though is if he's inconsistent is to ask the court to modify the order to where visitation is at your discretion.

This is not a popular idea, and many courts won't even dream of it.

Ok, thank you for the information. I believe I have more than sufficient evidence of at least a few of my concerns (others harder to prove), some things that would probably raise a few eyebrows. Then again, judges have probably seen it all. My intentions is to keep my daughter safe physically and emotionally. My last question now would be, in my case, would it be wise to let sleeping dogs lie and NOT establish paternity and file anything and wait for him to do it, or to start something myself?

Until paternity is decided and he has a court order in his hands, you are not obliged to let him see the child at all.

Let him file. If he wants to see his child, I see no reason for you to file anything at all.

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Quoting indianamom1

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I believe its unlikely that the father would accept coming to our home or even town to visit. He would either come a couple times and quit, or not at all. If this happens, is there any action I could take to prevent him from coming in and out of her life, before the time she would remember it occurring? Or would that be something we would just have to deal with?

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Unfortunately, that is just something that you would have to deal with. However, you can ask to have it included in the orders that if dad skips any of the phased in visits that he has to start over from scratch.

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Also in the case of supervised visits, if the father behaved inappropriately or abusive to DD during the visits, what recourse could I take?

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The supervisor would promptly remove the child from the situation.