Can a Seventeen-Year-Old Move Out to Get Married

My question involves juvenile law in the State of: north carolina. I am seventeen currently and I am wanting to know if there is any legal way for me to move in with and get married to my fiance without parental consent. I graduated high school at 14 years old and will have my associates degree in applied animal science in May of this year. I have a job and am paying for my own insurance, gas, phone bill and clothing. All my parents are providing me is shelter and food. I am far ahead in life compared to most my age. Is there any option for me to leave this place? I want to move to Virginia with my fiance. I want to do things in the right order preferably and get married to him first. Originally, my parents were going to sign for me and him to get married before I turned 18. Obviously they approved of him. When they found out he was seeking a good paying job position in VA, they immediately turned their nose up and started interfering in our relationship to end it or control him to stay here. He simply said he was going to go somewhere where he knew he could take care of and provide for his soon to be family. Now, my parents are refusing to give their stamp of approval on our marriage. Because of this, it is really making things hard for me and him. It is merely selfishness that caused their change of mind. I am not going to do anything different once I am 18. I will still choose him and I will go to VA to be with him. I do not want to sit around and watch time tick by until I am 18 (ten months away) to continue on with my life.

Please tell me there is a way for me to persue marriage without having to wait for the magic 'age of majority' to arrive. I am not like the majority of people, and I really don't want to be treated as though I am. Are there any 'run away laws' that could work to my advantage? Is emancipation at all possible without parental consent or being pregnant?

Don't watch time tick by. Start a Bachelors degree or continue working a job.

To marry in North Carolina, unless you manage to convince a court to emancipate you, you will need parental permission.

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Quoting klalphin9257

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All my parents are providing me is shelter and food.

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Just those 2 little things?????

Even being pregnant won't do the job for you. In EVERY state, a minor needs parental permission, permission from the court, or both, before she can marry, EVEN IF SHE IS PREGNANT.

You get parental permission or you wait till you're 18. There are no special provisions that will exempt you from the law. It still applies to you no matter how special a snowflake you think you are.

I didn't say this but if your BF were to change his plans and stay in NC, parents might still approve. Once married, well, crap happens and plans change.

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Quoting Disagreeable

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Don't watch time tick by. Start a Bachelors degree or continue working a job.

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Good advice. I am working still. I love my job and I am making killer money for a 17 y\o girl. I plan to transfer to Virginia Tech to continue on in my animal science studies. Funny, that is in VA too... I've heard it is an excellent school and I have a few recommendations to veterinary offices in VA as well for potential work. I will have to wait until 18 as well to continue my education because of the same 'moving away' issue. I love your advice though! Much appreciated!

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Quoting Mr. Knowitall

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To marry in North Carolina, unless you manage to convince a court to emancipate you, you will need parental permission.

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How could I go about convincing a court go emancipate me? What is the information I would have to gather as well as criteria I have to meet? I mean...if you don't mind me asking...I am sure it all varies from state to state and I have looked, but I can't seem to find exactly what I need.

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Quoting CourtClerk

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Just those 2 little things?????

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Those are what they legally are required to provide me. I have a outstanding paying job and can provide for myself entirely. It is not necessary at this time because they meet those two needs. Half of the time, I pay for my own food. I eat healthier than them, so to prevent issues, I fend for myself. It causes a lot less tension at home that way. What I am basically saying is that I am self sufficient, and as my parents, they provide the basic necessities to legally cover their bases.

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Quoting cbg

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Even being pregnant won't do the job for you. In EVERY state, a minor needs parental permission, permission from the court, or both, before she can marry, EVEN IF SHE IS PREGNANT.

You get parental permission or you wait till you're 18. There are no special provisions that will exempt you from the law. It still applies to you no matter how special a snowflake you think you are.

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Gotcha. I had heard from a few people that being pregnant will sway the courts to emancipate, even if the parents do not agree. I'm not trying to think I am some 'special snowflake', but if you were in my shoes, you might would understand how hard it is to be constantly judged by a number attached to you for everything in life. I know that eventually it happens to everybody, but when you graduate at 14, you get judged by that number a lot more than than the average Joe. Just trying to go to college, I was told I was too young. There is no age requirement for college. Just a high school diploma. I had that. I did just as much work as anybody else did, just quicker. It is hard to feel like you were given a head start on everything in life to then be halted by a number. Makes you wonder why you are different if you are just going to be treated like the rest.

Oh, and good luck ever having friends or people who identify with you when you are like me. People your age are seem immature still. The ones you identify with are adults. Then when the adults find out how old you are, they immediately treat you different. You would never fit in anywhere...not because you were socially awkward or because you have something wrong with you, but because of a number.

I know that in ten more months the whole world will open up to me. I am just trying my best to find a way to have something in my life - which everybody else who has graduated hs, practically finished an associates degree, and begun establishing a career for their self is capable of choosing on their own - without being held back by that same number which has halted me throughout my whole life. For once, I want to choose for myself based on my capability to think like an adult instead of my mommy and daddy saying I can or can't do something. I'm not trying to be treated special, just according to my true peers - adults.

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Quoting Disagreeable

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I didn't say this but if your BF were to change his plans and stay in NC, parents might still approve. Once married, well, crap happens and plans change.

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Oh. My. God. Best advice ever! Basically, circumvent the whole issue by seemingly giving the parents what they want, when in reality, you are keeping your mouth shut about the real plans! Now, if only this tid bit had come along before he had been offered and accepted the offer to work in VA.... It is, unfortunately a tad bit late for this plan, but thank you none the less!!!

No matter how smart you are, you're still a child. I don't mean that as an insult, just that the person you are at 17 is not the same person you'll be at 25 or 30.

I met my husband at 18, and married him at 28. I knew at 18 that I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, but I also know that if I had married him at 18, that our marriage wouldn't have lasted. We both still had a lot of growing up to do.

Finish your education. Get a career. Travel. Become an independent and well rounded adult before you settle down. Especially before you have kids. You never know what the future might hold. People grow apart. Spouses die, they leave, they divorce. You'll never regret being able to care for yourself if you end up single.

You'll be doing yourself and your fiance a huge favor in the long term if you slow down and don't rush into a marriage right now. I think your parents realize that, and are trying to protect you from rushing into something that you truly are not ready for.

No matter how smart you are or how advanced you are for you age in some areas, there is the matter of learning by living. And to be quite honest, you haven't done that. Your parents are trying to look out for you because they know that you haven't had the learning experiences to do it yourself. Most imortant the love you and want you to be in a situation where you will have the best chances. Life doesn't come with any guarantees. Life can be very hard and unpredictable. Plans it took yrs or a life time to make can be gone in the blink of the eye. Show your parents the Respect they deserve. You may not get to do things right now like you want to. But, you won't regret putting your parents first when you get a little older.

Having a baby doesn't mean you're an adult. Some people are responsible parents at 18, some parents never learn the meaning of the word. Having a child when you're under 18 only means that you're responsible for the child, not that you're responsible for yourself. I know it doesn't make sense, but that is the way it is.

NC law is a bit odd when it comes to marriage of persons under age 18. It allows a pregant minor aged 14-16 to seek permission from a court to marry if she will be marrying the putative father and can convince the court that the minor will “capable of assuming the responsibilities of marriage and the marriage will serve the best interest of the underage party.” Consent of the minor’s parents is not needed, though the statute states that the parents’ objection will create a rebuttable presumption that the marriage is not in the best interests of the minor. NC GS § 51-2.1. But for a 17 year old pregnant minor, there is no option of going to court. The only way to get married in that situation is to get permission of the minor’s parents, become emancipated, or wait until she turns age 18. NC GS § 51-2.

So, in your case, if you cannot get your parents’ permission, emancipation is your only other option to get married before age 18. In order to do that, you must petition the court in your county. The standard to be applied in the hearing is the best interests of the minor who is petitioning for emancipation. Among the factors to be considered is the need of the minor to marry. See Chapter 7B, Article 35 of the NC statutes. If you succeed in the lawuit, you’ll be free of your parents’ control and eligible to marry. If you are interested in pursuing this, see a family lawyer in NC. I don’t know how quickly you could get a court to rule on the petition. It may be that you’d be 18 by the time it was all done. That’s something to ask the lawyer, as well as how much it will cost to do it.