Ex Parte Modification of Custody Due to Inability to Exchange Child as Ordered

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Washington DC

My husband and the mother of his child are feuding over my stepson. We live in Arizona and she lives in Washington DC. I have just had it up to here with this woman dictating and trying to ruin lives. They have a joint 6-month/6-month custody agreement that began at October of last year with her beginning time first. She asked us to come get him in early February and we did no questions asked. Mind you, she would have only spent less that 4 months of her time with the child. He was not due to be picked up until May 2014 as we had wedding plans back east. She was ok with that. Unfortunately, life happened and we were removed from our living situation that caused my husband to loose his job and any possible funds to return the child at the time that is in Court papers and texts. She went to the court today and received temporary sole legal and physical custody of the child, in which we had no idea was going on. She apparently filed for an emergency hearing (12/10/14) and was denied that and set a expedited court date for today. My husband was never notified of this BTW. Now, my question is, since we kept communication with the mother at all times, is there anyway we are able to appeal this decision and it actually be looked at and not just thrown out? I have never used a forum before but at this point I am desperate for help. Also, in the papers, it states my husband is in contempt of the court (Washington DC court), but what exactly does that mean?

(not a good idea to start off a post by slamming the other parent)

I'm not seeing where Mom did anything wrong; they had a 50/50 timeshare and clearly Dad wasn't able to exercise his time, hence Mom filing an exparte motion so she could act immediately.

What does your husband wish to accomplish?

It means he was legally obligated to return said child and did not do so. Therefore the court revoked all his rights to custody and visitation temporarily, then issued a contempt order against him. She did not do anything. Hubby had a legal commitment to fulfill and ignored it. The reason is irrelevant. The court is not waiting to for him to show up and face the music. LAX to DC one way is $149 with a months advance notice. You and hubby have a credibility issue.

Trust me, there is a lot I am leaving out of this. She neglects her children. She has 2 children already under state custody. She can't pass drug tests. the child has gotten hurt and ending up in the hospital with stitches in his head before he even turn 1 yrs old. This isn't the half of it. He just wants to make sure that when he returns to court in March, will he be given the chance to tell his side of the story and possibly gain the joint custody back or even sole from his side with the evidence that we have against her. And if you couldn't tell, I am a little angry about this whole thing. She has definitely called me way worse things. I don't think this should phase her. Besides, she has what she wanted now. She could care less about what I have to say.

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Quoting Disagreeable

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It means he was legally obligated to return said child and did not do so. Therefore the court revoked all his rights to custody and visitation temporarily, then issued a contempt order against him. She did not do anything. Hubby had a legal commitment to fulfill and ignored it. The reason is irrelevant. The court is not waiting to for him to show up and face the music. LAX to DC one way is $149 with a months advance notice. You and hubby have a credibility issue.

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Good grief - if I read that wrongly, Stepmommy has even LESS room to complain and she didn't have much to begin with!

Which has absolutely nothing to do with him being guilty of violating the courts orders. He had from May until December to make his case and did nothing.

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Quoting Ashley Blakeney

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Trust me, there is a lot I am leaving out of this. She neglects her children. She has 2 children already under state custody. She can't pass drug tests. the child has gotten hurt and ending up in the hospital with stitches in his head before he even turn 1 yrs old. This isn't the half of it. He just wants to make sure that when he returns to court in March, will he be given the chance to tell his side of the story and possibly gain the joint custody back or even sole from his side with the evidence that we have against her.

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Quoting Ashley Blakeney

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Trust me, there is a lot I am leaving out of this. She neglects her children. She has 2 children already under state custody. She can't pass drug tests. the child has gotten hurt and ending up in the hospital with stitches in his head before he even turn 1 yrs old. This isn't the half of it. He just wants to make sure that when he returns to court in March, will he be given the chance to tell his side of the story and possibly gain the joint custody back or even sole from his side with the evidence that we have against her.

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Are you telling us that Mom has all of these issues and the court ordered a 50/50 timeshare anyway?

Seriously? Someone somewhere seems to be missing something.

No, Dad's not getting sole. And if Mom is smart, the 50/50 will disappear too.

What do you mean he had from May to December to make his case and done nothing? As far as we were concerned, especially with the replies from the Mother, everything was fine.

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YES I AM! That is where the problem lies. I don't know if DC is a mother state or what, but after all this 50/50 custody was the verdict, and nothing else submitted against her seemed to be taken into consideration.

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Excuse me?

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WOW! Seeking information from a forum is pointless. There is not credibility issue here. We can clearly take ownership of what we did wrong. Yes he knows the child was not returned in time, but doing nothing? No, he did do something. He contacted the other parent in attempt to resolve this issue like adults.

This tells me that either things weren't quite as described, or that both CPS and the police and the courts were in on some sort of conspiracy.

If Mom gets smart, she'll end up with primary custody and Dad having regular visitation. He can basically say goodbye to 50/50, and there's not a chance of sole custody.

We have pictures, text messages, amongst other proof that is pretty clear. I am not sure why they chose what they chose. All I know is that I am trying to figure out what are the options from here now that this has been legally submitted. BTW she lied to the courts. That doesn't account for anything?

You do realize he may be jailed when he appears in DC for court?

It is highly unlikely that all of these allegations of the mother relate to facts that only became known after the court entered the 50/50 custody order. If dad chose not to raise issues at that hearing, he is not going to be able to use those known facts to try to argue a change of circumstance that would justify modifying custody. If dad raised the issues and the court didn't believe him, then there would be no change of circumstances.

As it appears that mom is already seeking modification of custody due to dad's failure to comply with the custody order, though, the issue of a change of circumstances may not be an impediment -- if the court proceeds with custody modification proceedings on mom's petition, dad will be able to present a full best interests case. Still, arguing that facts he knew about prior to the last custody order is an uphill battle, as either the court didn't find his allegations to be credible and will likely decline to revisit allegations that have already been litigated or he didn't think that they were important enough to raise at that time.

If dad is still retaining the child, he had best find a way to get the child back to his mother ASAP, and had best be prepared to convince the court that he will never again miss a parenting exchange.

Well unfortunately you are mistaken Mr Knowitall because it was all submitted and this was granted. And the courts know she has two children under custody of the state. After all the was submitted, they appointed my stepson with a guardian ad litem and thats where everything went left. That lady never found anything wrong so this why the court ordered 50/50 custody over and beyond what we had submitted prior to the guardian ad litem being appointed. She has made arrangements to come get the child after the holidays as she says, but she was such in a rush to get him back...hmmmm...

I mean I know I asked for some clarification but I am not stupid. I do realize that, however the papers do say he can appear by phone in court. Thanks for your concern.

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Quoting Ashley Blakeney

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Well unfortunately you are mistaken Mr Knowitall because it was all submitted and this was granted.

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If you are trying to argue that the court heard all of your husband's allegations, yet awarded the parents 50/50 custody, either the evidence is nowhere near as compelling as you have suggested or your husband has his own pile of skeletons in his own closet.

no skeletons here. I don't see how a infant who had what appeared to be cigarette burn marks on their stomach and an unexplainable gash in his forehead that amounted to getting stitches and having two kids already in custody of the state for neglect is not compelling enough. Interesting...

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Quoting Ashley Blakeney

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no skeletons here. I don't see how a infant who had what appeared to be cigarette burn marks on their stomach and an unexplainable gash in his forehead that amounted to getting stitches and having two kids already in custody of the state for neglect is not compelling enough. Interesting...

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It doesn't matter how you word it, re-word it, or spray paint it on the walls - the fact remains that the court found Mom perfectly fit. And Dad basically ended up doing just about the worst thing he could in the circumstances....he kept the child longer than he was meant to. He's shown the court that he doesn't respect that court and if there's one surefire way of pissing off a judge, that would be it.

The best he can do now is damage control, but he's facing a huge burden.

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Quoting Ashley Blakeney

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no skeletons here. I don't see how a infant who had what appeared to be cigarette burn marks on their stomach and an unexplainable gash in his forehead that amounted to getting stitches and having two kids already in custody of the state for neglect is not compelling enough. Interesting...

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That's what you're telling us -- so again, you're either wrong about your husband's skeletons or the evidence is nowhere near as compelling as you are trying to suggest.

You are entitled to your opinion but unfortunately I would have to disagree with you. IT doesn't help especially if the State that the order is being done in, is a "Mother" state. and yes that does exist.

It's not my opinion. It's what you told us the judge ordered after hearing your ex- make all of those accusations against the mother.

Your delusion that a court will ignore compelling evidence merely because mom wants custody is duly noted; it is nonetheless a delusion.

There is no delusion. You can argue this as you want but you were not there therefore this is your opinion. I am stating facts that happened. If it is that hard for you to believe and want to call me delusional, you are entitled to that. Reality is this is what happened and it is just as hard for me to believe that it happened. but a judge is just that a judge and will supposedly order under the best interest of the child. But my point of asking these questions was to seek valid advice. not opinions on why the evidence was not taken into account. I sit here and question that everyday but that don't change what happened. Period. If you want to help, then help, but do not tell me what happened isn't what happened, especially if you were not there. I would greatly appreciate that.

Well, then, I suggest you hire an attorney for Dad in the jurisdiction where the hearings will be held. That's the best thing you can do for him. :eagerness:

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When evaluating states based upon the "degree to which they promote shared parenting after divorce or separation," 25 states received a grade of D or F. A total of 18 states, including Florida, received Cs and eight states, including Washington D.C., received Bs. No states received an A.

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Far from being a "mom" state, DC appears to be the opposite.

(Source: National Parents Organization, “STATE-BY-STATE ANALYSIS HIGHLIGHTS PARENTAL INEQUALITY ACROSS THE NATION,"

USA Today, "Report: States fail on shared parenting laws," Jonathan Ellis, Nov. 13, 2014

National Parents Organization, "2014 Shared Parenting Report Card A New Look At Child Welfare A State-by-State Ranking," 2014 )

And this bunch of lovely data are just fun reading: http://www.villainouscompany.com/vcb...supportcu.html

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Quoting Ashley Blakeney

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There is no delusion. You can argue this as you want but you were not there therefore this is your opinion. I am stating facts that happened.

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You are arguing in circles.

You told us that your boyfriend through a spaghetti platter full of toxic accusations at his ex- in court. You told us that the court nonetheless found them to be equal in their qualification to be parents, and awarded equal custody. So you are either telling us that your husband was every bit as unimpressive to the court as the mother, or you are telling us that the court didn't find your husband to be credible. It really is that simple.