Are Parenting Coordinators Beneficial
My question involves a child custody case from the State of: IL
Our GAL wants to add a "Parenting Coordinator" to my ex's and my conflicted post-decree relationship. I did some research about these parenting coordinators, and in addition to signing away my civil and 4th amendment rights, these seem to be a pretty horrible road to go down. From the website "Liz's Law":
Many, if not most, lawyer parenting coordinators as well as many mental health professionals, notwithstanding their ostensible "training", completely lack psychological insight. That's because it's not a function of academic training. Parenting coordination also is not "co-parenting therapy" (which rarely works anyway -- witness all the mental health professionals lobbying, writing, organizing, promoting, bucking for the authority to be mini-judges and dictators in a "parenting coordination" role.) Most mental health professionals also lack a clue regarding the repercussions in law of their ideas (a more obvious deficit, since they are probably not lawyers), yet these are people supposedly interpreting and "filling in the gaps" in legal documents!
Is it possible to get rid of the GAL at this point? She is supposed to re-write our parenting agreement, but I have not been asked for any input as of yet.
Thank you.
Re: Are Parenting Coordinators Beneficial
You have indicated that you have a high-conflict case, and you have not indicated that there is any basis upon which the judge might reconsider his decision to appoint a GAL, so at this point we have no way of commenting either on what you believe to be the grounds for removal or why a judge might find your argument to be compelling.
If you and your ex- do not want a parenting coordinator, the best way to demonstrate that one should not be appointed is to start working cooperatively on parenting time issues. The idea of the coordinator is to try to keep smaller disputes and conflicts out of court, and at least in theory the appointment should provide for faster resolution of conflicts. Having to pay the parenting coordinator's fees is sometimes also enough to inspire parents to stop arguing over trivialities. I don't know whether parenting coordinators in your county have the power to make decisions, as opposed to merely making recommendations.
My personal preference is to keep as few third parties in the case as possible. But if the parents cannot cooperate and keep bringing their case back to court, I understand why the judge starts looking to additional professionals -- referees, mediators, custody evaluators, GALs, parenting coordinators, and the like -- to keep his docket clear for the rest of his cases.
Re: Are Parenting Coordinators Beneficial
Quote:
Quoting
No_Angel
My question involves a child custody case from the State of: IL
Our GAL wants to add a "Parenting Coordinator" to my ex's and my conflicted post-decree relationship. I did some research about these parenting coordinators, and in addition to signing away my civil and 4th amendment rights, these seem to be a pretty horrible road to go down. From the website "Liz's Law":
Many, if not most, lawyer parenting coordinators as well as many mental health professionals, notwithstanding their ostensible "training", completely lack psychological insight. That's because it's not a function of academic training. Parenting coordination also is not "co-parenting therapy" (which rarely works anyway -- witness all the mental health professionals lobbying, writing, organizing, promoting, bucking for the authority to be mini-judges and dictators in a "parenting coordination" role.) Most mental health professionals also lack a clue regarding the repercussions in law of their ideas (a more obvious deficit, since they are probably not lawyers), yet these are people supposedly interpreting and "filling in the gaps" in legal documents!
Is it possible to get rid of the GAL at this point? She is supposed to re-write our parenting agreement, but I have not been asked for any input as of yet.
Thank you.
Having a parenting coordinator has upsides, and downsides. The downside is that some outsider has control over your family...and a bad one can demonstrate bias in favor of one parents or another. The upside is that the parenting coordinator can make decisions that block stalemates between parents. This can be a very good thing in some circumstances.
Re: Are Parenting Coordinators Beneficial
Thank you for your replies. An educated opinion is certainly something of value.
I spoke with my attorney at length today about a parenting coordinator, because the research I did scared the crap out of me. My ex is in favor of a parenting coordinator but I don't think he realizes the scope and depth of disruption parenting coordinators have. This would be someone else in our lives until our children turn 18, and the bills alone would eat up any college savings I could hope to accomplish. My attorney also said that she doesn't think that our relationship is not high conflict enough to warrant a parenting coordinator and that the GAL was not really suggesting a PC.
I wanted to get rid of the GAL but again my attorney told me that would not happen until the judge dismissed her.
Thanks again for your information
Re: Are Parenting Coordinators Beneficial
I would find a better site than liz library to peruse.
What anecdotal stories I've heard about parenting coordinators haven't been great, though no personal experience. However, it wouldn't necessarily have to be until your children were all grown. If you do end up with one, it might only be for a year or two. But don't make an enemy out of your gal.