Recovering Custody After Allegations of Alcohol Abuse

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Alaska
I feel that my child has been wrongfully taken. My ex-bf had her taken by saying that I was an alcoholic, drug attic, that put my child in harms way several time. He lied and said that he was her biological dad. I proved that I'm sober, I proved that he is not the dad, I will prove that he could not even be the psychological dad, what are my chances of getting her back fully. I admitted to drinking alcohol, but he said a bunch of lies about things that I subposably did while on alcohol, that may make the judge think I am unfit. When I go to court next, I will have a chance to tell the judge that, that stuff is not true. Its been a year now, and I only have visitation and 1 over night, unsupervised with my daughter. I fired my previous attorney for not representing me. I paid him over $10,000 and he did nothing for me. In fact, he has a problem with females that have past substance abuse history. Also, can I sew the first court that got my child put in temp, custody. I told them that he was not her dad, he was never around, he did drugs, and that he was violent. So rather then giving me my daughter, they would not let me put my child with my family because they had a dometic violence from over 10 years ogo. They gave my daughter to his sister who worked for them for 5 years and his mother ran the place for 25+yrs. Gaurdianship ended, and she refused to give my child back. so we went to a different court(state of Alaska) and interium custody was given to my ex. I didn't have a chance to say a lot that I wanted to, my lawyer was not prepared, he didn't call any of my witnesses etc. Can my ex bf get away with this? can I sew the Sitka tribe of Alaska? mainly the case workers? can I sew my ex-lawyer? they also got all of my medical records. I'm sober, I provide for me and my daughter with a child on the way. my baby comes home and doesn't want to leave. she cries when I say that she has to go with him. shes already said that he was touching her. I told a councilor, they said that I had to report it or I was goin to get into trouble, so I reported it and am now being charged with making a false report. even though she is on a recording saying it. the judge gave my child to him. he never wanted my baby. he didn't want her to have his last name, he didn't want to be on the birth certificate, he didn't feed her, change her, bathe her, play with her etc. I strongly believe that he did this to get back at me for leaving him. When we broke up, I left town. he had the police meet me off of the ferry. They said to had over your child or you will be arrested. I had no idea wtf was going on. I followed instructins and flew back to Sitka immediately. he told them that she was her biological father, I neglected her and put her in harms way. So he had a DV on me. I got one on him. tSitka tribe dropped mine and his was being handled in state court. STA said that if I did not drop the DV on him, then I would no longer have visitation with my daughter. they said if he can not see her, neither can you. I swear to god, there has been a long string of foul play from day one. My poor baby quit talking for quit some time. she never did good with being with other people. Ive only had a babysitter 2-3 times before she was taken. I don't know what to do. I've been fighting so hard ever since and I'm really scared that when the 1st of October comes(court) there not gonna give her back. 7 months ago, I filed for more visitation. the judge still has not responed. a few months ago, I filed for modification of custody. still no word, but we have court in a few weeks. my ex asked for a settlement judge but I know his not gonna give up full custody. I don't trust him alone with her, hes violent with a long history of drug use. im fighting for full custody of MY CHILD!! im taking a hair folicule this week which is clean. are private investigators expensive? is it to late for one? what are my chances of getting my baby back? he doesn't do her hair, he doesn't cut her nails, che hates going with him, he took her off of dairy so now her nails are brown. he has the GAL convinced that he is the best dad in the world. the GAL said that I sould be thankful that my daughter even has clothes on her back. I WAS ****ING PISSED when she said that. also, this was not the first time that my ex has been accusted of sexual assault. is not a registered sex offender because he didn't get charged. So, theres no evidence of anything. There calling me a liar because everthing I have said, there is no proof to. If they would have listened from the beginning, I could have proven his drug use. if the cops would have taken pics, there would be proof of bruises from him. I got royally ****ed, what do I do? I refuse to give up. if its the last thing I do on this earth, I will get my child back. I just cant lose another week being away from her. I have 3 weeks to convince this judge that the best interest of my daughter, is to be with me.

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also, I got a new lawyer, but Im scared I need a better one. im scared its too late. someone plz tell me what to do.

If your attorney is not versed in Tribal law, you need one.

It appears the child has no good options aside from being put where the court decides. You do not appear to be fit parenting material.

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Quoting melissa012412

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My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Alaska
I feel that my child has been wrongfully taken. My ex-bf had her taken by saying that I was an alcoholic, drug attic, that put my child in harms way several time. He lied and said that he was her biological dad. I proved that I'm sober, I proved that he is not the dad, I will prove that he could not even be the psychological dad, what are my chances of getting her back fully.

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Can we assume that he's the legal father? We'll have to assume that otherwise none of this makes sense at all.

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I admitted to drinking alcohol, but he said a bunch of lies about things that I subposably did while on alcohol, that may make the judge think I am unfit. When I go to court next, I will have a chance to tell the judge that, that stuff is not true. Its been a year now, and I only have visitation and 1 over night, unsupervised with my daughter. I fired my previous attorney for not representing me. I paid him over $10,000 and he did nothing for me. In fact, he has a problem with females that have past substance abuse history.

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The court - whichever court it is - has obviously acknowledged him as Dad and has allowed him to exercise full custody rights.

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Also, can I sew the first court that got my child put in temp, custody. I told them that he was not her dad, he was never around, he did drugs, and that he was violent.

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You're not suing anybody and that's NOT where you need to focus.

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So rather then giving me my daughter, they would not let me put my child with my family because they had a dometic violence from over 10 years ogo. They gave my daughter to his sister who worked for them for 5 years and his mother ran the place for 25+yrs. Gaurdianship ended, and she refused to give my child back. so we went to a different court(state of Alaska) and interium custody was given to my ex. I didn't have a chance to say a lot that I wanted to, my lawyer was not prepared, he didn't call any of my witnesses etc. Can my ex bf get away with this? can I sew the Sitka tribe of Alaska?

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You're really going to need an attorney - but there are a couple of us who have at least some knowledge on Tribal Law as it pertains to custody.

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mainly the case workers? can I sew my ex-lawyer? they also got all of my medical records. I'm sober, I provide for me and my daughter with a child on the way. my baby comes home and doesn't want to leave. she cries when I say that she has to go with him. shes already said that he was touching her. I told a councilor, they said that I had to report it or I was goin to get into trouble, so I reported it and am now being charged with making a false report.

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Okay - if this is true you've made a HORRENDOUS mistake. You coached the child and recorded her? That doesn't paint you in a good light at all.

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even though she is on a recording saying it. the judge gave my child to him. he never wanted my baby. he didn't want her to have his last name, he didn't want to be on the birth certificate, he didn't feed her, change her, bathe her, play with her etc.

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Honestly, none of that matters - he's obviously able to care for her adequately.

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I strongly believe that he did this to get back at me for leaving him. When we broke up, I left town. he had the police meet me off of the ferry. They said to had over your child or you will be arrested. I had no idea wtf was going on. I followed instructins and flew back to Sitka immediately. he told them that she was her biological father, I neglected her and put her in harms way. So he had a DV on me. I got one on him.

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You filed a DV complaint because he filed one on you?!

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tSitka tribe dropped mine and his was being handled in state court. STA said that if I did not drop the DV on him, then I would no longer have visitation with my daughter. they said if he can not see her, neither can you. I swear to god, there has been a long string of foul play from day one. My poor baby quit talking for quit some time. she never did good with being with other people. Ive only had a babysitter 2-3 times before she was taken. I don't know what to do. I've been fighting so hard ever since and I'm really scared that when the 1st of October comes(court) there not gonna give her back. 7 months ago, I filed for more visitation. the judge still has not responed. a few months ago, I filed for modification of custody. still no word, but we have court in a few weeks. my ex asked for a settlement judge but I know his not gonna give up full custody. I don't trust him alone with her, hes violent with a long history of drug use.

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The problem is that the court does trust him, and she is not in harm's way by remaining with him.

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im fighting for full custody of MY CHILD!! im taking a hair folicule this week which is clean. are private investigators expensive? is it to late for one? what are my chances of getting my baby back? he doesn't do her hair, he doesn't cut her nails, che hates going with him, he took her off of dairy so now her nails are brown. he has the GAL convinced that he is the best dad in the world.

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The court doesn't care about hair and nails.

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the GAL said that I sould be thankful that my daughter even has clothes on her back. I WAS ****ING PISSED when she said that. also, this was not the first time that my ex has been accusted of sexual assault. is not a registered sex offender because he didn't get charged.

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No evidence of anything.

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So, theres no evidence of anything. There calling me a liar because everthing I have said, there is no proof to. If they would have listened from the beginning, I could have proven his drug use. if the cops would have taken pics, there would be proof of bruises from him. I got royally ****ed, what do I do? I refuse to give up. if its the last thing I do on this earth, I will get my child back. I just cant lose another week being away from her. I have 3 weeks to convince this judge that the best interest of my daughter, is to be with me.

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also, I got a new lawyer, but Im scared I need a better one. im scared its too late. someone plz tell me what to do.

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So - there was a GAL assigned, and the GAL obviously feels that Dad is a better placement. If the GAL recommends Dad keeps custody, that recommendation will carry enormous weight.

This is where I'm really going to need some answers, okay ? Your narrative isn't too clear.

Which court gave him custody?
Which court is governing the October hearing?

Is paternity established? I don't mean biologically. I mean legally. And in which court?

Paternity is established. The judge knows now. so the standards for custody change. its no longer the best interest, its a non parent seeking custody. that's what the judge said. the sta court gave his sister temp custody, that ended, and the state gave him interim custody. the judge has granted my motion to modify custody. we attend a settlement hearing 2 days before the October hearing as well. I understand that nothing matters uless you can prove it, both that sould go for both sides, correct?

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also, for the interim custody, the judge said that I was not unfit.

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he has never adopted her.

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also, can I get my aunt(my moms sister, the one who raised me)custody? does she have any rights if they prove me unfit?

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shouldn't he have to prove that he has ever even been a psychological parent?

WHO is the LEGAL father?

How LONG has the child been with him?

There is no legal father. The biological father is not and has never been in the picture. My ex-bf has only had custody since the interium hearing. I was her primary and only care giver.

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Only I am on the birth certificate.

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only I am on the birth certificate.
I did not coach her on anything. The police told me to record her

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can I petition for his GAL to be off the case? Can I have her replaced with a custody investigator? I do not feel that she is doing her job right. She never drug tested him when I told her that he was using. She said that her reasons for being on his side is because she thinks he is at such great risk over this sexual assault situation even though nothing is being done about it. She lied on court paperwork and said that she asked me for a hair folicule 3 times and for me to submit to her the results. That is 100% not true. Although I have taken a hair folicule test and passed.

This admittedly is not making much sense.

I'm going to list some points, could you do a basic yes/no for me please?

1. Dad did not adopt the child
2 He's not the legal father
3. A court - I'm still not sure which - gave him custody
4. In the past year or so, neither the GAL nor the court has actually taken notice that he's not bio or legal Dad.

I know there might be other questions - bear with me please.

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You were misguided - and it's possibly the worst thing you could have done. I'd be astonished if it was actually admitted into evidence.

From your narrative it sounds a lot less that we're talking about a standard custody case, and a lot more like we're talking about child protective proceedings that resulted in the appointment of a guardian for the child instead of placement in foster care. Is that in fact what we're talking about?

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Quoting Dogmatique

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4. In the past year or so, neither the GAL nor the court has actually taken notice that he's not bio or legal Dad.

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If this started out as a protective proceeding, identifying the child's father would be part of the subsequent legal process -- to make sure that his rights are respected, to consider him as a possible placement for his child, and if necessary to terminate his parental rights if the case doesn't proceed toward reunification.

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Quoting melissa012412

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I did not coach her on anything. The police told me to record her

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And based on that you're being charged with making a false police report? Criminally charged?

Even a marginally trained officer would not have told you to interview and record your own child. There are specific protocols that must be followed to ensure that a child's statements and memory are not tainted, and an accusing parent is about the worst person you can ask to question the child if you want a result that is either reliable or likely to be usable in court.

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Quoting melissa012412

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he never wanted my baby. he didn't want her to have his last name, he didn't want to be on the birth certificate....

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Are you stating that you wanted him to perjure himself on an acknowledgement of paternity, claiming to be the father of a child you both knew was not his biological child?

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Quoting melissa012412

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also, I got a new lawyer, but Im scared I need a better one.

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If you want a different lawyer, you find the lawyer you want to hire, negotiate a fee, and write a retainer check. The lawyer then substitutes into the case, replacing the one who presently represents you.

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Quoting melissa012412

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Paternity is established.

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Quoting melissa012412

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There is no legal father.

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If paternity is established, then there is a legal father -- the process of establishing paternity involves identifying the legal father and vesting him with rights. What you appear to mean is that a DNA test confirmed that your ex-, who is presently the child's guardian, is not the child's biological father.

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Quoting melissa012412

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also, can I get my aunt(my moms sister, the one who raised me)custody? does she have any rights if they prove me unfit?

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You need to be working with your lawyer. You also need to decide if you are trying to recover custody, yourself, or if you are on board with the court awarding custody to a third party. If you don't want custody, yourself, your ex- may in fact be the most appropriate person for the court to whom the court may grant custody, even if you would prefer some other relation who has no prior custodial relationship with the child.

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Quoting melissa012412

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can I petition for his GAL to be off the case?

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It's not "his" GAL. The GAL represents the child's best interest. You can talk to your lawyer about trying to remove or replace the GAL. If the trial court trusts the GAL, that's likely a bad idea. If not, it's probably unnecessary.

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Quoting Mr. Knowitall

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From your narrative it sounds a lot less that we're talking about a standard custody case, and a lot more like we're talking about child protective proceedings that resulted in the appointment of a guardian for the child instead of placement in foster care. Is that in fact what we're talking about?

If this started out as a protective proceeding, identifying the child's father would be part of the subsequent legal process -- to make sure that his rights are respected, to consider him as a possible placement for his child, and if necessary to terminate his parental rights if the case doesn't proceed toward reunification.

And based on that you're being charged with making a false police report? Criminally charged?

Even a marginally trained officer would not have told you to interview and record your own child. There are specific protocols that must be followed to ensure that a child's statements and memory are not tainted, and an accusing parent is about the worst person you can ask to question the child if you want a result that is either reliable or likely to be usable in court.

Are you stating that you wanted him to perjure himself on an acknowledgement of paternity, claiming to be the father of a child you both knew was not his biological child?

If you want a different lawyer, you find the lawyer you want to hire, negotiate a fee, and write a retainer check. The lawyer then substitutes into the case, replacing the one who presently represents you.


If paternity is established, then there is a legal father -- the process of establishing paternity involves identifying the legal father and vesting him with rights. What you appear to mean is that a DNA test confirmed that your ex-, who is presently the child's guardian, is not the child's biological father.

You need to be working with your lawyer. You also need to decide if you are trying to recover custody, yourself, or if you are on board with the court awarding custody to a third party. If you don't want custody, yourself, your ex- may in fact be the most appropriate person for the court to whom the court may grant custody, even if you would prefer some other relation who has no prior custodial relationship with the child.

It's not "his" GAL. The GAL represents the child's best interest. You can talk to your lawyer about trying to remove or replace the GAL. If the trial court trusts the GAL, that's likely a bad idea. If not, it's probably unnecessary.

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I don't think she meant that paternity was established. It think that she meant that a DNA test was done that proves he is not the father. Based on what the judge said, I think that is pretty clear.