Divorced over 1 year now. During most of the divorce and up until now, I get constant emails from my ex that are picking fights with me, lecturing me, pointing out how I am uncooperative, refuse to co-parent, etc etc., why am I trying to minimize his parenting time, etc. I usually just come back with I don't want to fight, I just want to follow the parenting plan.
I try to be very business-like and keep it short but in a way, my ex is using that against me by constantly throwing digs out about how I am not communicating with him more.
At one point it got so bad that I decided to use a go-between (parellel parenting was taught to us in our state-mandated parenting class for divorce) and things were much better. When at court, my ex complained about this to the judge and the judge had us use Our Family Wizard. Things got better for a while but now they have just progressively gotten worse again. At the present time I have an email that is about four pages long bringing up instances of things that happened two years ago that I don't even know how to respond to.
I feel badly posting about this when I see others have much worse situations than I do -custody battles etc, but I just want peace and quiet and I literally have anxiety every time I check my email. Is there anything that can be done? I have to find an atty and go back to court anyway for another issue relating to a post-D financial issue that has never been taken care of so I am wondering if this is something that can also be discussed? Thanks in advance for the help.
Constant Hostile Emails from Ex Spouse
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07-31-2014, 11:40 AMsarah1975Constant Hostile Emails from Ex Spouse
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07-31-2014, 11:43 AMCourtClerkRe: Constant Hostile Emails from Ex Spouse
How about.... not responding to the madness? Sure, I realize that that means you'll actually give yourself peace of mind and that would be too much like right.
Answer the pertinent parts of the email only. Not in long drawn out dissertations, but:
Yes, the children will be ready by 4.
No, little Johnny did not have any homework this weekend. -
07-31-2014, 11:45 AMllworkingRe: Constant Hostile Emails from Ex SpouseAbout the only thing that I can think of is to ask the judge to order that all communication be through Our Family Wizard, ONLY.Quote:
Quoting sarah1975
Other than that, you have to learn to laugh at his rants rather than letting them get to you. -
07-31-2014, 01:36 PMsarah1975Re: Constant Hostile Emails from Ex Spouse
Ok It is not necessary for me to respond/deny to accusations made against me? A friend pointed out that it makes me look bad to not refute things that are being said painting me in a bad light?
Thanks for the help -
07-31-2014, 01:56 PMCourtClerkRe: Constant Hostile Emails from Ex SpouseNo, it's not necessary. Women tend to like to have too much conversation and then stress out because they're talking back to them, so you can say something back, so they can say something back, so you can say something back - then its a battle of who is going to get the last word in.Quote:
Quoting sarah1975
So you're going to deny the accusations. If you deny then, will it make him say oh... ok. Thanks for the clarification FRIEND! No. It's going to make another email come with some more accusations. Then you want to defend those too. Don't take advice from people who thrive on DRAMA.
Has your mom ever taught you about ignoring things?