Modifying Support from the Amount Set by a Separation Agreement

My question involves child support in the State of: North Carolina

I have been separated from my wife since May of 2013. I am ready to finalize my divorce but I will not do so until I can reduce the amount of what she calls is "child support" I am currently "trying" to pay.

When I left my wife we decided that to make things easier on the two children (4 & 7 yrs old now) and on us, I would continue to pay half of the entire home expenses as if I were living in the home. This included AAA membership, car insurance which we both still had together on a single policy, etc.

Obviously, a lot has changed in the last year. I have a separate AAA membership, separate car insurance, health insurance, etc. I am still required to pay the $1,800 per the agreement. I understand that. I have tried to talk with the ex wife to get her to negotiate down the amount I am paying to a level that is reasonable due to the expenses I have to pay but she refuses to talk about it or address it.

We share joint custody of the children. She works full time and makes at least $70k per year. I make a bit more than that but my pay is spotty due to me being an employee of a start up company. I do not receive normal paychecks so supplying a pay stub is not possible. I can supply bank statements but that is it.

I have used the NC payment calculator for child support and according to it, I should be paying a third of what I am paying now.

So here are my questions:

1. Is it possible to get a reduction in child support after paying this amount over the past year or so? I have a history of paying late and I am currently in arrears by about $2,000.

2. Is it possible to find an attorney who will work for me that I can pay AFTER the reduction in child support is granted? (If it is granted at all which I assume it would be.)

3. Do I have a case at all?

4. She is threatening to file a breach of contract and I have no idea what the consequences of that are? The court steps in and I am then charged with a crime?

If she would just negotiate with me, I am more than willing to pay more than what the NC calculator says I should pay but she wont budge. She loves being able to live in a nice house in a nice neighborhood that she cannot afford on her own and have me to continue to pay for half of it.

Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Was the agreement signed as part of your divorce paperwork? If so, plan on basically starting your divorce over from scratch. If you attempt to rescind that part of it, she is likely to attempt to rescind everything else. That may be the best thing or it may be the worst thing. That all depends on the other parts of the agreement and how important those other parts are for you.

We are not divorced yet. Only separated. I want to have this issue settled before I or she files for divorce.

So this was just an agreement between the two of you; never recognized by a court of law?

Correct. We both signed the agreement and it was submitted to an attorney.

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Quoting neonc72

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Correct. We both signed the agreement and it was submitted to an attorney.

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Ok...then you need to consult with that attorney as to how binding that separation agreement is. It is my understanding that separation agreements in NC are quite binding, due to the long waiting period to divorce. Some define them as a "divorce from bed and board", and the final divorce as an "absolute divorce".

What's the hold up in getting divorced? Just take the issue to court and allow the judge to make an order.

Is it really that simple @courtclerk? I have been told that what I signed is a contract between me and the ex. I am bound by its terms even though it has no end date. Should I just file for divorce and go to court with the current separation agreement and plead my case and pray for a reduction in the amount of child support I pay?

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Quoting neonc72

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Is it really that simple @courtclerk? I have been told that what I signed is a contract between me and the ex. I am bound by its terms even though it has no end date. Should I just file for divorce and go to court with the current separation agreement and plead my case and pray for a reduction in the amount of child support I pay?

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Who hired the attorney that handled the separation agreement? You, or your spouse? You really need to be talking to an attorney in your area.

What you have NOW is a mutually agreed contract. What will serve to nullify that contract is having it REPLACED (superceded) by a DIVORCE ORDER.