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Overnight Visitation for an Infant Child
My question involves child support in the State of: texas
Two weeks ago i order child support on my baby's father. By law he can take the baby on the weekends from friday thru sunday. The problem is that the baby is only 2 months old and im breastfeeding him and idont agree with him taking the baby to spend the Night. One because he does not like the bottle n does not eat at all, and two bcuz he is so little and cries alot at night if he doesnt see me. Is there anything i could do so he only takes the baby during the day n not at night??
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
If there is a court order, you have to follow it. If you choose not to follow the court order, you may find yourself losing custody altogether, paying fines, or spending time in jail for contempt of court.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
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flakiz
My question involves child support in the State of: texas
Two weeks ago i order child support on my baby's father. By law he can take the baby on the weekends from friday thru sunday. The problem is that the baby is only 2 months old and im breastfeeding him and idont agree with him taking the baby to spend the Night. One because he does not like the bottle n does not eat at all, and two bcuz he is so little and cries alot at night if he doesnt see me. Is there anything i could do so he only takes the baby during the day n not at night??
Please clarify - is there actually a court order for visitation?
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
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Dogmatique
Please clarify - is there actually a court order for visitation?
what, you don't believe dad got every weekend Friday through Sunday with a 2 month old?;)
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
I guess . Um we went to the child support office and thats what they told us
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Is this for me or dogmatic???
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
a court order is in writing, if you don't have a copy go to the court and request a copy next week.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
I have a packet they gave me where it does says hE. Can take the baby with him . Is there something we can do at court to fix this. So he wont take the baby to sleep over at least till he turns 6 months since im breastfeeding
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
If you've never been to court to establish custody and visitation, visitation is up to you.
Child support office has no authority to determine visitation.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
who is they? social services? a court? your attorney? legal aid?
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
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Lehk
who is they? social services? a court? your attorney? legal aid?
This was at the child support office, and they told me that if i didnt sign the agreement that he has to see the baby on thursdays and take him from fri to sunday then i had to go to court and pay, and that court would force me to sign the agreement. And i have the packet and the papers i signed.
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Dogmatique
CSE by all accounts.
What do u mean by CSE?
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
Hon, we're trying to help you.
Can you tells us WHAT exactly did Child Support give you?
And please clarify - you have never been to court about visitation and custody, right?
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
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Dogmatique
Hon, we're trying to help you.
Can you tells us WHAT exactly did Child Support give you?
And please clarify - you have never been to court about visitation and custody, right?
It was a packet saying that he had to take the baby w him on the weekends and i had to sign it if i didnt wanted to go to court.
And NO i have NEVER been to court. Only to the child support Office
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
This is where I'm having the problem.
Custody and visitation cannot be decided by the Child Support Office.
So you need to do something over the weekend. You need to find out exactly where these papers came from, and where they ended up. This is really important because the question has two basic answers, and they're very very different from each other.
Do you happen to have the number of the form? It will probably be at the bottom somewhere. If not, go here and search for yours and/or Dad's names.
http://www.courts.state.tx.us/searchable.asp
Then we'll see what's going on.
I can tell you one thing for sure. Texas is not exactly fond of long weekends with an infant; your child is only 2 months old and unless you and Dad were living together until very recently, it's not really best for baby.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
We can agree to disagree about overnights. Mom can buy a breast pump also.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
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Dogmatique
This is where I'm having the problem.
Custody and visitation cannot be decided by the Child Support Office.
So you need to do something over the weekend. You need to find out exactly where these papers came from, and where they ended up. This is really important because the question has two basic answers, and they're very very different from each other.
Do you happen to have the number of the form? It will probably be at the bottom somewhere. If not, go here and search for yours and/or Dad's names.
http://www.courts.state.tx.us/searchable.asp
Then we'll see what's going on.
I can tell you one thing for sure. Texas is not exactly fond of long weekends with an infant; your child is only 2 months old and unless you and Dad were living together until very recently, it's not really best for baby.
I found this OAG Number 0013014249. At the very top of page im not sure if this is the number of the form. Im about to click on the link
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Disagreeable
We can agree to disagree about overnights. Mom can buy a breast pump also.
I do have a breast pump, and i pumped milk for him but he just wont take the bottle he cries and cries. Also he wont go to sleep if im not there with him trust me i've tried so many thingz . But the father dont care if the baby takes the bottle or not he only wants to have the baby wit him
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
The baby won't starve itself. Eventually, he'll eat. Pump the milk, pack the bag and hand him off to dad. The earlier you get him used to getting around daddy, the better for everyone. There's nothing special about 6 months, then you're going to say... but he's only 6 months, then it's he's only a year old and he's never spent the night without me. You put the child in a position where they're going to have 2 different homes, so get them used to it.
Dad is capable of taking care of a child or calling someone to help him.
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CourtClerk
The baby won't starve itself. Eventually, he'll eat. Pump the milk, pack the bag and hand him off to dad. The earlier you get him used to getting around daddy, the better for everyone. There's nothing special about 6 months, then you're going to say... but he's only 6 months, then it's he's only a year old and he's never spent the night without me. You put the child in a position where they're going to have 2 different homes, so get them used to it.
Dad is capable of taking care of a child or calling someone to help him.
I understand this but this just shows how much he cares about his son, just bcus the baby cant talk it dont mean dat he can choose for the baby. If he really wants the best for him then he would not take him away from me overnight at least till he grows up a little
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Dogmatique
This is where I'm having the problem.
Custody and visitation cannot be decided by the Child Support Office.
So you need to do something over the weekend. You need to find out exactly where these papers came from, and where they ended up. This is really important because the question has two basic answers, and they're very very different from each other.
Do you happen to have the number of the form? It will probably be at the bottom somewhere. If not, go here and search for yours and/or Dad's names.
http://www.courts.state.tx.us/searchable.asp
Then we'll see what's going on.
I can tell you one thing for sure. Texas is not exactly fond of long weekends with an infant; your child is only 2 months old and unless you and Dad were living together until very recently, it's not really best for baby.
Theres no where for me to type our names
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CourtClerk
The baby won't starve itself. Eventually, he'll eat. Pump the milk, pack the bag and hand him off to dad. The earlier you get him used to getting around daddy, the better for everyone. There's nothing special about 6 months, then you're going to say... but he's only 6 months, then it's he's only a year old and he's never spent the night without me. You put the child in a position where they're going to have 2 different homes, so get them used to it.
Dad is capable of taking care of a child or calling someone to help him.
No offense. But you probably only understand LAWS, you dont understand about best for babies. I as a mother chose breastfeeding instead of formula. Why? Becuz i know mothers milk is the best gift for a baby." Best food" according to the doctors. I know im still pumping milk for him overnight but he wants to feel his mothers warm and comfortableness to sleep and eat well. I hope you and the court look at both sides of the story not just LAWS! Meaning i hope they understand that right now he is just an infant n needs his mother most of the time. And whenever he grows up a little then the father can even take him for weeks if he wants.
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What is clear is you do not want dad to bond with the child and you want to treat it like a possession.
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flakiz
I understand this but this just shows how much he cares about his son, just bcus the baby cant talk it dont mean dat he can choose for the baby. If he really wants the best for him then he would not take him away from me overnight at least till he grows up a little
Well if he can't choose for the baby, then neither can you because that baby has TWO parents. What makes you more special than he is?
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No offense. But you probably only understand LAWS, you dont understand about best for babies. I as a mother chose breastfeeding instead of formula. Why? Becuz i know mothers milk is the best gift for a baby." Best food" according to the doctors. I know im still pumping milk for him overnight but he wants to feel his mothers warm and comfortableness to sleep and eat well. I hope you and the court look at both sides of the story not just LAWS! Meaning i hope they understand that right now he is just an infant n needs his mother most of the time. And whenever he grows up a little then the father can even take him for weeks if he wants.
LMAOOOO.... I'm a mother. I have 2 children. One of them is in college. Knock it off. You didn't give birth to the baby Jesus. Your baby is just like every other one born in this world every day.
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Disagreeable
What is clear is you do not want dad to bond with the child and you want to treat it like a possession.
How do u want me to explain that i agree that he can take the baby with him any time any day . BUT not overnight until he is at least 9 months cant u understand that i want the best for the baby i dont care about the father. ONLY for my son is dat im worried about. Im not doing this for my benefit or for fathers benefit. This is an infant used to being w me dat he wants "nipple" NOT "bottle" u think da baby's like " oh i want to be w my father he can breastfeed me" no right? He only 2 months and he wants to b w me!!! Probably whenever he turns one he might even wanna be and live wit his father n he is going to tell me. But right now he cant talk okay!!!!
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flakiz
How do u want me to explain that i agree that he can take the baby with him any time any day . BUT not overnight until he is at least 9 months cant u understand that i want the best for the baby i dont care about the father. ONLY for my son is dat im worried about. Im not doing this for my benefit or for fathers benefit. This is an infant used to being w me dat he wants "nipple" NOT "bottle" u think da baby's like " oh i want to be w my father he can breastfeed me" no right? He only 2 months and he wants to b w me!!! Probably whenever he turns one he might even wanna be and live wit his father n he is going to tell me. But right now he cant talk okay!!!!
For the love of Pete.
This is NOT Myspace - please don't type in Tween.
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flakiz
He only 2 months and he wants to b w me!!!
Did he tell you that?
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But right now he cant talk okay!!!!
So how do you know that he only wants to be with you?
I'll tell you what. I generally am a proponent to having adults be reasonable and work things out without judicial intervention, but your child's father needs to RUN to the courthouse on Monday and MAKE you turn the child over to him. Enough of you showing you have no interest in coparenting and wanting to control everything and YOU'LL be the one with visitation.
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flakiz
I understand this but this just shows how much he cares about his son, just bcus the baby cant talk it dont mean dat he can choose for the baby. If he really wants the best for him then he would not take him away from me overnight at least till he grows up a little
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Theres no where for me to type our names
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No offense. But you probably only understand LAWS, you dont understand about best for babies. I as a mother chose breastfeeding instead of formula. Why? Becuz i know mothers milk is the best gift for a baby." Best food" according to the doctors. I know im still pumping milk for him overnight but he wants to feel his mothers warm and comfortableness to sleep and eat well. I hope you and the court look at both sides of the story not just LAWS! Meaning i hope they understand that right now he is just an infant n needs his mother most of the time. And whenever he grows up a little then the father can even take him for weeks if he wants.
I DID NOT MEAN YOUR NAMES.
I meant the name of the damn form. As in, "Form XYZ"
And if you want further help, get yourself out of your snit. We're not here to take crap.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
As I said, you do not want him to bond. A few posts ago 7 months was okay, now it is 9 months.
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flakiz
How do u want me to explain that i agree that he can take the baby with him any time any day . BUT not overnight until he is at least 9 months cant u understand that i want the best for the baby i dont care about the father. ONLY for my son is dat im worried about. Im not doing this for my benefit or for fathers benefit. This is an infant used to being w me dat he wants "nipple" NOT "bottle" u think da baby's like " oh i want to be w my father he can breastfeed me" no right? He only 2 months and he wants to b w me!!! Probably whenever he turns one he might even wanna be and live wit his father n he is going to tell me. But right now he cant talk okay!!!!
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CourtClerk
Well if he can't choose for the baby, then neither can you because that baby has TWO parents. What makes you more special than he is?
LMAOOOO.... I'm a mother. I have 2 children. One of them is in college. Knock it off. You didn't give birth to the baby Jesus. Your baby is just like every other one born in this world every day.
So yr telling me to treat MY SON like EVERY OTHER CHILD?????? Why???? Because this is what u did with yr kids???? Sorry ma'm but i love my baby n dont care about yrs if u gave him to his father and his father gave him to his mother and his mother gave him to his sister To take care of him . But i do care about mine and im not going to let dat happen .
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CourtClerk
Did he tell you that?
So how do you know that he only wants to be with you?
I'll tell you what. I generally am a proponent to having adults be reasonable and work things out without judicial intervention, but your child's father needs to RUN to the courthouse on Monday and MAKE you turn the child over to him. Enough of you showing you have no interest in coparenting and wanting to control everything and YOU'LL be the one with visitation.
/sidebar FB no worky.
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flakiz
So yr telling me to treat MY SON like EVERY OTHER CHILD?????? Why???? Because this is what u did with yr kids???? Sorry ma'm but i love my baby n dont care about yrs if u gave him to his father and his father gave him to his mother and his mother gave him to his sister To take care of him . But i do care about mine and im not going to let dat happen .
Honey I'm two steps away of wanting to find Dad. You're treading a very fine line between "I'm just frustrated" and "OMGZ IT'S MY BABY HE CAN'T HAVE MY BABY"
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
That was not for u that was for that person insulting me...and all i want is help not people to insult me .
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flakiz
So yr telling me to treat MY SON like EVERY OTHER CHILD?????? Why???? Because this is what u did with yr kids???? Sorry ma'm but i love my baby n dont care about yrs if u gave him to his father and his father gave him to his mother and his mother gave him to his sister To take care of him . But i do care about mine and im not going to let dat happen .
And that.... is why they have courts. Granted, I was able to get my son to adulthood and he has no children. He's busy actually being productive in life and doing something other than having children with little ignorant girls who can't spell properly.
I raised my children sweetie pie. You've run off on all kinds of tangents but the funny thing is the court is going to treat your child just like every other child on this earth and nothing special. He's not, to anyone but you. I wish your son's father well. Tell him to register an account on here and inbox me. I'd love to help him be successful in what he's asking for.
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Dogmatique
/sidebar FB no worky.
Shoot, I guess that's why you never responded, huh? I'm trying to give the puppeh some time to chew on his peanut butter rawhide so I can go back to sleep
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
You forgot the illegal Mexican, illegally working part CC.
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flakiz
That was not for u that was for that person insulting me...and all i want is help not people to insult me .
I don't care WHO it was aimed at.
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CourtClerk
And that.... is why they have courts. Granted, I was able to get my son to adulthood and he has no children. He's busy actually being productive in life and doing something other than having children with little ignorant girls who can't spell properly.
I raised my children sweetie pie. You've run off on all kinds of tangents but the funny thing is the court is going to treat your child just like every other child on this earth and nothing special. He's not, to anyone but you. I wish your son's father well. Tell him to register an account on here and inbox me. I'd love to help him be successful in what he's asking for.
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Shoot, I guess that's why you never responded, huh? I'm trying to give the puppeh some time to chew on his peanut butter rawhide so I can go back to sleep
That'd be why :(
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Dogmatique
/sidebar FB no worky.
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Honey I'm two steps away of wanting to find Dad. You're treading a very fine line between "I'm just frustrated" and "OMGZ IT'S MY BABY HE CAN'T HAVE MY BABY"
Sorry im just nervous. All i want is help and advice plaese. I really want his father to have a bond with the baby . But this is the first time i go thru this situation and is just so hard for me
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flakiz
Sorry im just nervous. All i want is help and advice plaese. I really want his father to have a bond with the baby . But this is the first time i go thru this situation and is just so hard for me
I'm less concerned about the parenting schedule than I am the issue of child support and all that.
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flakiz
Sorry im just nervous. All i want is help and advice plaese. I really want his father to have a bond with the baby . But this is the first time i go thru this situation and is just so hard for me
But you want to control the bonding? That's not the way it works when you decide to have a baby with someone else. It's not just your toy alone. You have to SHARE since you didn't get married before you decided to make a baby
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Disagreeable
You forgot the illegal Mexican, illegally working part CC.
Huh?
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CourtClerk
But you want to control the bonding? That's not the way it works when you decide to have a baby with someone else. It's not just your toy alone. You have to SHARE since you didn't get married before you decided to make a baby
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Huh?
Then i guess i am wrong, it just hurts me so much to see my son cry whenever i drop him off and to know that he keeps crying at night :( .... so i just want to know if theres something i can do at court about him sleeping over right now while he is an infant. Since as dogmatic said texas is not okay with long weekends for infants
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flakiz
Then i guess i am wrong, it just hurts me so much to see my son cry whenever i drop him off and to know that he keeps crying at night :( .... so i just want to know if theres something i can do at court about him sleeping over right now while he is an infant. Since as dogmatic said texas is not okay with long weekends for infants
If I may clarify? Much as I might disagree personally, the truth is that unless you and Dad were either married or lived together very recently the court isn't going to be keen on separating him from his primary caregiver.
Now for practical advice.
He's going to cry. He's going to be difficult. And that's going to last until's at least 30. But if Dad is never given the chance to really bond, it makes it far more difficult on ALL of you.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
Babies cry. Your son has probably even cried with you. Just like you get over it then, you'll get over it when he's with his father. Your son will definitely get over it.
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
To the OP: until there is court involvement, you decide where your baby sleeps. A nursing mother DOES have a different position in a new baby's life than a non-resident father. Nobody can force you to have your baby bottle-fed, and if the baby's father goes to court to obtain overnights before the baby is weaned, you can make your argument and a judge will decide. Until a judge decides, you get to decide. Don't worry about feeling abused by others on this site, some of them come here specifically to tweak people's noses, make them feel badly, and not be helpful. If I were you I would certainly not pay attention to their dismissive attitude that tells you fathers are just as important in the lives of a 2-month-old baby as their nursing mothers. Somebody has been smoking something if they truly think that.
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Dogmatique
If you've never been to court to establish custody and visitation, visitation is up to you.
Child support office has no authority to determine visitation.
This is Texas...remember that in Texas when the AG sets child support the AG can also set standard TX guideline visitation?
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Re: 2month Baby Sleeping Over Father's House
personally I think y'all are being trolled but in case you aren't.
First, has paternity even been established? If not, we are being trolled. If paternity has been established, next step.
It is HIGHLY unlikely they ordered full weekend visits, Friday to Sundays, including overnights with a 2 month old, especially EVERY weekend. It is out of the norm for a child over 3 years old (which is the break point in Texas law) so I doubt it is the situation with a child being 2 months old so again, I suspect we are being trolled
Then, there is this:
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This was at the child support office, and they told me that if i didnt sign the agreement that he has to see the baby on thursdays and take him from fri to sunday then i had to go to court and pay, and that court would force me to sign the agreement. And i have the packet and the papers i signed.
pay for what?
and courts do not force you to sign agreements. They have the power to issue enforceable orders without your signature so there is no reason to even consider threatening you that the court will make you sign something.
but threatening you? with a different order? Why would they suggest the judge would order something greater than what they are putting in place? Makes no sense. The judge is going to use the same guidelines as they are. In fact, unless they place what a judge would typically place, it is likely they would cause a huge caseload for the courts because the parent wanting more than thought they would get more if ordered by a judge is going to file for that modification. Impractical at best.
then, mom;
when you bought the child, didn't it come with instructions that if you refuse to share your toy with the other parent, it causes irreparable damage to your new toy.
Oh ya, that's right; you didn't buy it and it isn't a toy. It is a child with two parents. Refusing to allow the child to bond with the father is damaging to the child.
and what the Hell difference does it make whether the father has the child all day long or all night long? The feeds every hour or couple of hours, right? Are you running over and whipping out a breast every couple of hours during the day to feed the child but don't want to do it at night? Seriously, your argument is illogical. It makes absolutely no sense what so ever.