Teenager Refuses Visitation and Communication

Right. Have you gone to the house to go pick this child up or are you waiting for her to come on her own?

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Quoting CourtClerk

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Right. Have you gone to the house to go pick this child up or are you waiting for her to come on her own?

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I think our posts may have crossed...the answer is prior to this post.

Keep in mind this is new and still developing. I'm just trying to find out what my rights and options are. If she really has blocked my number from calling her, I will have to reach out to her mother. If that doesn't happen then legal actions might be my only recourse - regretfully, because I really hope it doesn't come down to that at this point in our lives.

What do you mean this is new and still developing? Per your own posts, she's been doing this for YEARS. Face it dad, you've been ineffective and passive aggressive and you're waiting for this to fix itself.

You and that child would have been sitting with a family counselor YEARS ago but now when she's a head strong 16 year old who has TWO parents who let her decide what to do...

it's a problem.

Not legal advice, but my own opinion:

You're a good dad. But, yes...you have helped to raise a spoiled brat.

I grew up in a poor family. I said "no" to braces because I knew my family could not afford it. I got a job 2 days after I turned 16. Granted, my family bought a new car and gave me their old one (a Ford Escort) and I paid for my own license, my insurance, registration, gas, oil changes, repairs. If I wanted something like a pair of name-brand jeans (vs KMart), or a bass guitar and amp, I earned the money and paid for them 100%.

I was 14 or so...wanted a sweater from the local store. My state has a bottle deposit law, 10 cents per beer/pop can or bottle. I wanted that sweater. Put it in lay-a-way, and then picked up bottles/cans from the roadside and even dumpster dived until I could pay it off. The store was a Wal-Mart type place, and I actually did wear that sweater until my late 30's.

Time to cut her and mom off of the spare cash. If daughter wants money for extracurricular activities, you should be allowed to participate or atleast be able to attend games, etc. If your daughter doesn't want you at a ballet recital or high school game and you're paying...cut her off.

That clothes shopping trip....you take her to/from store, and you set a strict limit "I have the credit card and coupons, you have X amount to spend".

Extracurricular...she's 16, she can get a McJob to pay for it

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Quoting PandorasBox

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Not legal advice, but my own opinion:

You're a good dad. But, yes...you have helped to raise a spoiled brat.

I grew up in a poor family. I said "no" to braces because I knew my family could not afford it. I got a job 2 days after I turned 16. Granted, my family bought a new car and gave me their old one (a Ford Escort) and I paid for my own license, my insurance, registration, gas, oil changes, repairs. If I wanted something like a pair of name-brand jeans (vs KMart), or a bass guitar and amp, I earned the money and paid for them 100%.

I was 14 or so...wanted a sweater from the local store. My state has a bottle deposit law, 10 cents per beer/pop can or bottle. I wanted that sweater. Put it in lay-a-way, and then picked up bottles/cans from the roadside and even dumpster dived until I could pay it off. The store was a Wal-Mart type place, and I actually did wear that sweater until my late 30's.

Time to cut her and mom off of the spare cash. If daughter wants money for extracurricular activities, you should be allowed to participate or atleast be able to attend games, etc. If your daughter doesn't want you at a ballet recital or high school game and you're paying...cut her off.

That clothes shopping trip....you take her to/from store, and you set a strict limit "I have the credit card and coupons, you have X amount to spend".

Extracurricular...she's 16, she can get a McJob to pay for it

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I grew up exactly how you did which is why I went overboard with my daughter over the years. Also out of guilt for not being a live in parent. I agree with every word you have said, and I have officially cut off extra cash and this is why I have her threatening to leave my life.

I thank you all for legal and personal thoughts. I have a lot to think about and to consider.

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Quoting CourtClerk

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What do you mean this is new and still developing? Per your own posts, she's been doing this for YEARS. Face it dad, you've been ineffective and passive aggressive and you're waiting for this to fix itself.

You and that child would have been sitting with a family counselor YEARS ago but now when she's a head strong 16 year old who has TWO parents who let her decide what to do...

it's a problem.

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Yes it is a very big problem. What I meant by still developing is that this is the first time she's had an outburst and actually telling me she wants nothing to do with me and will block me from being able to contact her and I will never see her again. This is a first and I'm devastated.

About 6 months ago when I was driving her home she made some rude comments to me, I reprimanded her, I didn't see her for over 2 months and whenever she didn't answer my calls, I would call her mom and would hear "she is upset with you and just needs time" - I know she is spoiled and lately, she is always upset with me unless we are shopping. I don't live with her, I have no way of grounding her - except cutting off extra funds and when I do, we have this problem. If I went to court to fix it every time, I wouldn't have a job. I can't take days off every month for court dates. I always try to work it out with her mom and usually have success - after a while, but not so sure about this time - which is why I am researching my rights and options.

Your ok by recourse at this time then is to start enforcing that parenting plan. If daughter either is not dropped off for her time with you or is not made available for her time with you (yes, you DO need to go and make the effort) then you can start documenting and eventually take mom to court for contempt.

Darling brat is 16, you still have 2 years to parent. So, parent.