Termination of Noncustodial Fathers' Rights

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Colorado

Hello. I have full "decision making" and physical custody. I have a permanent order of protection against the father for chronic and severe domestic violence. Father has highly supervised visitation at a certified visitation center twice a month for up to four hours each visit, to be determined by both his payment and therapeutic professionals. (i.e. they can end the visit in the best interests of the children). He is currently AWOL. He had his first visit with them mid November last year. The center called me afterwards to tell me that they would no longer supervise the visits until he was further evaluated and rehabilitated, and that he had in fact "fired" them. He then disappeared, failed to comply with his probation (i.e. did not report or show up at all). This was a 3-year supervised probation sentenced for a misdemeanor 1 assault upon me. (He got a plea deal down from a felony). He turned himself in. (but still no efforts to arrange visits with the children). They reinstated his probation and gave him a six-month suspended county jail sentence. He disappeared again. There is currently a warrant out for his FTC on the probation. He will go to jail for six months. The family court judge ordered his visitations with the caveat (STRONG caveat) that he fully comply with his probation and get a domestic violence assessment, etc., and until he was deemed ready by all professionals involved, he could not get more than the 2 visits a month. It has been three months since he has disappeared. I also do not get child support as he is chronically transient and unemployed. SO. What are the guidelines here? At what point can I protect my children from him just reappearing in their lives and making things crazy for them all over again. They are young (6 and 8) and have lived like this in constant chaos and fear until I finally ended the relationship 100% a year and a half ago. They finally have some peace and stability, and he comes to one very unpleasant and nerve-wracking visit and then disappears again. Any general advice would be greatly appreciated!!!

After you remarry, you and your spouse can discuss the possibility of stepparent adoption. If dad is still MIA for the year preceding the adoption, such that a court would conclude that he has abandoned the child with no intent to return (failing without cause to make contact or provide support), you should be able to proceed on the ground of abandonment even if he appears and objects. See n re J.A.V., 206 P.3d 467, 468 (Colo. App. 2009), Petition of R.H.N., 710 P.2d 482, 487 (Colo. 1985).

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Quoting Mr. Knowitall

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After you remarry, you and your spouse can discuss the possibility of stepparent adoption. If dad is still MIA for the year preceding the adoption, such that a court would conclude that he has abandoned the child with no intent to return (failing without cause to make contact or provide support), you should be able to proceed on the ground of abandonment even if he appears and objects. See n re J.A.V., 206 P.3d 467, 468 (Colo. App. 2009), Petition of R.H.N., 710 P.2d 482, 487 (Colo. 1985).

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While I agree with this advice, I really doubt that dad is going to attempt any further visitation. An abuser cannot stand to lose control over their victim and once they finally realize that they have fully lost control, they usually disappear like he has. He knows that if he surfaces again that he is going to jail. The only way he can attempt to assert visitation rights is to surface again. He isn't going to do that.

Thanks for the response. I have no plans to remarry ever. I am 45 years old and very happy without a man. Why does termination of parental rights always hinge on remarrying? Furthermore, we (father and I) were never married. Is there a length of time after which I could proceed? And although I agree with the post regarding it being unlikely that he will come back, he is a stalker, and a felony stalking charge was dropped in the plea bargain for the assault. So, his behavior is erratic and not always that of a typical abuser. Once his six months in jail is served, he could very well start being a problem again, and this will never end. So, any advice without the 'remarrying' bit? Thanks so much.

Unfortunately yes - it's up to the State to do an involuntary TPR.

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Quoting confusedmommy7

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Thanks for the response. I have no plans to remarry ever. I am 45 years old and very happy without a man. Why does termination of parental rights always hinge on remarrying? Furthermore, we (father and I) were never married. Is there a length of time after which I could proceed? And although I agree with the post regarding it being unlikely that he will come back, he is a stalker, and a felony stalking charge was dropped in the plea bargain for the assault. So, his behavior is erratic and not always that of a typical abuser. Once his six months in jail is served, he could very well start being a problem again, and this will never end. So, any advice without the 'remarrying' bit? Thanks so much.

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Termination of parental rights doesn't really hinge on remarrying. What is hinges on is someone else legally assuming the parental rights and responsibilities...because a state generally will not allow someone's parental rights and responsibilities to be terminated unless someone else is assuming those rights and responsibilities...mostly the responsibilities. Unfortunately in most cases, the only person who is legally able to do that (without the other parent also losing their rights) is a stepparent who is willing to adopt the child(ren).

In a case like yours its quite possible that dad's visitation rights could be suspended or terminated. However that is not the same as terminating his parental rights and responsibilities. Which also means that at some point, should he truly rehabilitate himself that he could obtain visitation, in some form, again...but which also means that even if he never gets visitation again, that he could be held responsible to support his child(ren).

The state also has the option of terminating a parent's rights and responsibilities in a situation where there is no one else to assume them, but the state feels that the parent is so dangerous to the children that the only choice is to terminate those rights and responsibilities. However, that normally doesn't happen unless they are terminating both parent's rights...because the state normally wants the offending parent to at least be responsible for supporting their child(ren).

Ll - post history.

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Quoting Dogmatique

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Ll - post history.

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Read...it..don't get it your point..

Oh for the love of....

I do sincerely apologize. I confused Mom with a different, and far less...appreciative...poster.

I shall now take some Nyquil.

Now I understand a little better. Thanks for the thoughtful explanation! What I need to do is proceed to have his visitation suspended, most likely, and to have the order of protection extended to cover the children temporarily.