What's the Tipping Point for Parental Alienation

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: IL

My child told me this morning that her father, my ex, regards his girlfriend's house as their "home" and that mom's home "is nothing to you" (the children). My ex-husband has told the children that my husband and I are "liars and you shouldn't believe anything they say". In the same conversation this child told me that my ex-husband said I am nothing to my children.

My older child told me today that my ex said the child does not have to do anything I say and that the children's real mother is his girlfriend.

The children spend more time with me and I receive child support based on 50/50 joint parenting.

Obviously, this is most upsetting. These are only examples from this year.

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Quoting No_Angel

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My question involves a child custody case from the State of: IL

My child told me this morning that her father, my ex, regards his girlfriend's house as their "home" and that mom's home "is nothing to you" (the children). My ex-husband has told the children that my husband and I are "liars and you shouldn't believe anything they say". In the same conversation this child told me that my ex-husband said I am nothing to my children.

My older child told me today that my ex said the child does not have to do anything I say and that the children's real mother is his girlfriend.

The children spend more time with me and I receive child support based on 50/50 joint parenting.

Obviously, this is most upsetting. These are only examples from this year.

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Most likely your best bet would be to get your children into counseling to help them deal with their father's bad behavior. A counselor could also be a witness in court if the counselor agrees that the things dad is saying are causing harm to the children.

One of the biggest problems you have is that you are only hearing the story second hand from your children. Your children told you that dad said . . . . . or his girlfriend said . . . . . It's hearsay.

A counselor is a good idea, as he/she could help the kids deal with having parents in separate homes and theoobvious issues involved there, as well as be a professional third party who can provide an assessment of the situation to a judge if need be.

How old are the children, and how did those conversations begin?

Thank you to all who have replied.

My children are 10. These conversations began at breakfast Friday morning when one of the children said that "I can't wait to get home". I said "You go back to your father's house after school" and the child said "I know. Daddy said it's the only home we have, and this is nothing".

I started counseling for the children in June 2013 as I noticed a great swing in moodiness in one of the children. That child is now receiving care for ADHD and we are still working on a diagnosis of a mood disorder, which to me seems likely.