Can I Get a Different Judge if I Don't Think the Court's Decision Was Fair

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Quoting Dogmatique

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Dad is a stay-at-home parent. Dad is the primary caregiver. Leaving the home WILL NOT change that unless he waits too long to file. Status quo is actually in his favor at this moment.

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You don't. What you do is file ASAP. You are the primary caregiver; in this situation that shouldn't change simply because you live somewhere else. You need to focus on the fact that you ARE the primary caregiver.

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I signed the divorce papers today to have her served later this week. The paralegal will call me tomorrow with a more accurate time frame.

Maybe she'll get the papers, come home during the day to grab a bunch of clothes, and be gone for good when the kids and I get home.

I am petitioning for exclusive use of the home.

I will ask the paralegal tomorrow, but does that (exclusive use) take effect when she is served ?

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Quoting Dogmatique

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Dad is a stay-at-home parent. Dad is the primary caregiver. Leaving the home WILL NOT change that unless he waits too long to file. Status quo is actually in his favor at this moment.

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You don't. What you do is file ASAP. You are the primary caregiver; in this situation that shouldn't change simply because you live somewhere else. You need to focus on the fact that you ARE the primary caregiver.

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A recent visitation case i was involved in was delayed 4 times, once by one lawyer and 3 times by another and that was just a modification of visitation. Just under a year start to finish (i think it was 10 months)...That was in NY.

If the first day in court the mother will request that they are returned home, at the very least, for school. The judge will grant that and a temporary custody schedule will be drawn up, you MAY get every weekend, maybe Every Other weekend, because you moved out. The next court date will be 2 months down the line, mom's lawyer, if any good, will ask for a continence to (get financial documents in order), so another 2 months, then you go to court, you not going to agree at that point, the judge will order you two to mediation. 3 months later back in court because you couldn't agree in mediation. Trial date is set 6 months later, one more continuence by mom's lawyer.....This is now 15 months later mom has had primary custody, she has set status quo.

You are now an EOW daddy.

DON'T MOVE OUT and i hope you are carrying your tape recorder around with you!

This women is dangerous, she WILL attack you again, put the police on speed dial! When she does, press charges and file again.

How do I get her out, then ?

Does my name only on the mortgage and deed make a difference ?

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Quoting george roy

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I am having divorce papers served this week.

I was trying to coincide the restraining order with the divorce papers.

Because I don't know what she will do when she is served.

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if something happens, you call the police, before it gets out of hand.


in your divorce, did you ask for temporary possession of the marital home? temp custody of the children?

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Quoting george roy

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Does my name only on the mortgage and deed make a difference ?

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at this point; not one bit. It is the marital home and until the divorce court orders anything otherwise, she is just as entitled to live there as you.

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Quoting jk

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if something happens, you call the police, before it gets out of hand.

in your divorce, did you ask for temporary possession of the marital home? temp custody of the children?

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at this point; not one bit. It is the marital home and until the divorce court orders anything otherwise, she is just as entitled to live there as you.

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Yes, I did ask for temporary possession of both children and home.

Is that effective when she is served ?

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Quoting SuperPop

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A recent visitation case i was involved in was delayed 4 times, once by one lawyer and 3 times by another and that was just a modification of visitation. Just under a year start to finish (i think it was 10 months)...That was in NY.

If the first day in court the mother will request that they are returned home, at the very least, for school. The judge will grant that and a temporary custody schedule will be drawn up, you MAY get every weekend, maybe Every Other weekend, because you moved out. The next court date will be 2 months down the line, mom's lawyer, if any good, will ask for a continence to (get financial documents in order), so another 2 months, then you go to court, you not going to agree at that point, the judge will order you two to mediation. 3 months later back in court because you couldn't agree in mediation. Trial date is set 6 months later, one more continuence by mom's lawyer.....This is now 15 months later mom has had primary custody, she has set status quo.

You are now an EOW daddy.

DON'T MOVE OUT and i hope you are carrying your tape recorder around with you!

This women is dangerous, she WILL attack you again, put the police on speed dial! When she does, press charges and file again.

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Telling him it's a definite "no" isn't helping him. I know that's often the party line, but sometimes it's just not that simple.

This would be one of those times. And seriously, you cannot predict what a judge will do in this case. Specially if Dad files for temp custody and the kids' schooling wouldn't be negatively affected.

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And looky here - Dad has already done the smart thing and requested use of the family home and custody of the kids. Go Dad! :D

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Quoting george roy

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Yes, I did ask for temporary possession of both children and home.

Is that effective when she is served ?

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Do you believe that a judge will give you possession of a home you don't live in? Take possession away from your STBX who has no apartment, but give it to you, who does have another place to stay already setup and available? Making her homeless, but giving you two living arrangements?

What about the children? Where are you moving to? Are you going to be able to find a place in the same town, county, school district? Why should they move out of their home(that he will be giving to your stbx if you move out)?

I'm sorry i'm being harsh George, honestly, i'm scared for you. I don't want you to make a big mistake!

You WILL get another chance to file a DV charge against your STBX, just wait it out, don't move out.

I have no idea why you're so adamant that Mom will likely win this. Even if he's moved out (and I'd bet he'll say it's temporary), he can indeed request exclusive use of the family home based solely on the fact that he's been the primary caregiver and the kids live there.

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Quoting Dogmatique

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I have no idea why you're so adamant that Mom will likely win this. Even if he's moved out (and I'd bet he'll say it's temporary), he can indeed request exclusive use of the family home based solely on the fact that he's been the primary caregiver and the kids live there.

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NY is not father friendly

Yet there are CPs who are male. Check "down the street" if you already haven't, using that moniker.

OP also has a HUGE plus on his side - the deed is in his name only.

Bye bye Mom!

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(In other words, the kids aren't moving anyway. Mom is moving out though...)