Can I Stop Paying Child Support if I'm Not the Biological Father

My question involves paternity law for the State of: Virginia

Good Morning Everyone,

I'm in the process of filling my divorce. We have been separated since October 2012. I caught the mother in infidelity. We had a daughter in December 2011 We had a separation agreement made through my lawyer in January. I was giving the mother $450 monthly, but it wasn't child support services ordered. It was just an agreement until the year was up until, we can do the divorce. In October, I did a at home DNA test and found out she wasn't my daughter. I did another one that is legal in court through a third party. They both came back saying that I wasn't the father. So I decided to stop paying child support. I confronted her about it and told her that the daughter wasn't mine. So she decided to go to child support services and try to get me for non payment. So I got a letter the other day stating that I need to make a payment. I'm still not making any, because I heard once you make one you can't get off. I consulted my lawyer and he said I should get my name removed the birth certificate. I sent a letter and my information such as the DNA test to Department of Vital Records to have my name removed. I plan to go to the city court to petition to have my name removed also. That's my information. Here are my questions

1.) Do you think I will have to still pay child support?

2.) Will the legal third party DNA test used instead of the court administrated one? Only saying, cuz I have already spent $500 between these 2 test. I really don't want to pay for another one.

You need to listen to your attorney.

The state may not allow you to disestablish paternity; if it does though you'll have no rights or obligations to the child.

The Dept of Vital Records will likely deny your request; you need to have paternity LEGALLY disestablished. Sending them a test result is meaningless.

From a legal standpoint the law appears to be on your side.

http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp...0+cod+20-49.10

§ 20-49.10. Relief from legal determination of paternity.

An individual may file a petition for relief and, except as provided herein, the court may set aside a final judgment, court order, administrative order, obligation to pay child support or any legal determination of paternity if a scientifically reliable genetic test performed in accordance with this chapter establishes the exclusion of the individual named as a father in the legal determination. The court shall appoint a guardian ad litem to represent the interest of the child. The petitioner shall pay the costs of such test. A court that sets aside a determination of paternity in accordance with this section shall order completion of a new birth record and may order any other appropriate relief, including setting aside an obligation to pay child support. No support order may be retroactively modified, but may be modified with respect to any period during which there is a pending petition for relief from a determination of paternity, but only from the date that notice of the petition was served on the nonfiling party.

A court shall not grant relief from determination of paternity if the individual named as father (i) acknowledged paternity knowing he was not the father, (ii) adopted the child, or (iii) knew that the child was conceived through artificial insemination.

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Quoting Disagreeable

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From a legal standpoint the law appears to be on your side.

http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp...0+cod+20-49.10

§ 20-49.10. Relief from legal determination of paternity.

An individual may file a petition for relief and, except as provided herein, the court may set aside a final judgment, court order, administrative order, obligation to pay child support or any legal determination of paternity if a scientifically reliable genetic test performed in accordance with this chapter establishes the exclusion of the individual named as a father in the legal determination. The court shall appoint a guardian ad litem to represent the interest of the child. The petitioner shall pay the costs of such test. A court that sets aside a determination of paternity in accordance with this section shall order completion of a new birth record and may order any other appropriate relief, including setting aside an obligation to pay child support. No support order may be retroactively modified, but may be modified with respect to any period during which there is a pending petition for relief from a determination of paternity, but only from the date that notice of the petition was served on the nonfiling party.

A court shall not grant relief from determination of paternity if the individual named as father (i) acknowledged paternity knowing he was not the father, (ii) adopted the child, or (iii) knew that the child was conceived through artificial insemination.

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I just want to emphasize however that you must still go to court to legally dis-establish paternity. You cannot just send the results to the department of vital statistics to get your named removed from the BC and to vacate the child support order.

Thanks for all the replies,

I'm pretty sure it varies from city to city.

Does anybody know what the time frame to have the petition to go to court and completed?

I would love to get this done with as soon as possible.

Thanks Again Everyone

It doesn't vary city to city. It varies state to state.

As far as timing, it takes as long as it takes. That's not being flippant - there's just no way we can guesstimate the size of that particular judge's docket, and all that.

Thanks for the reply. Here is my steps

1.) I will go to DCSE and inform them that I would like to have a paternity test done
2.) I will go the court to have a petition filed.

To be honest with you, I went to the DCSE the other day and I really don't like how the workers was handling my case. They looked kind of bias and they must think I'm one those stereotypes. It's just very unfortunate, but I understand it.

Thanks Again

DCSE isn't who you need to be concerned with at this point; they can't do a thing without the court acting first. Get the proof first, THEN you go to DSCE.

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Quoting Bingo2030

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Thanks for the reply. Here is my steps

1.) I will go to DCSE and inform them that I would like to have a paternity test done
2.) I will go the court to have a petition filed.

To be honest with you, I went to the DCSE the other day and I really don't like how the workers was handling my case. They looked kind of bias and they must think I'm one those stereotypes. It's just very unfortunate, but I understand it.

Thanks Again

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No, that is not at all what you do. You are divorcing...you make dis-establishing paternity part of your divorce case. If you cannot figure out how to do that on your own, then its time to hire an attorney for the divorce.

BINGO!!! As part of the divorce you must motion for disestablishment of paternity and elimination of child support based on the law.

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Quoting llworking

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No, that is not at all what you do. You are divorcing...you make dis-establishing paternity part of your divorce case. If you cannot figure out how to do that on your own, then its time to hire an attorney for the divorce.

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Thanks for your reply,

I have already consulted with my lawyer and he is making changes to the divorce paper work to remove the child from the document. In the meantime, he told me to try to get my name removed from the birth certificate. So I called, health records to see what I need to have my name removed. I sent them the documents and information they need. I went to DCSE, to talk to them about the situation, but they say I will get a summons on Jan or Feb if I don't make payments. I will go back to them on Monday to let them know that I want to get paternity test done and also I will be going to the court to have petition filed just in case. If you have any other suggestions please feel free to express them. I really value your views on this situation.

Thanks again.

If there is not a court order saying you must pay support, you are not required to. Based on your explanation it appears the agreement expired after 1 year.

Seriously - going back to DCSE will accomplish nothing at this point. Health records won't matter until it's been decided in court.

You need to have paternity disestablished as part of the divorce action. If your attorney doesn't know this, it's time for a new attorney.

Alright,

Ok. I will contact the attorney Monday morning and see what's up with that. I will come back and let y'all know what happens.

Thanks.

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Quoting Bingo2030

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Thanks for your reply,

I have already consulted with my lawyer and he is making changes to the divorce paper work to remove the child from the document. In the meantime, he told me to try to get my name removed from the birth certificate. So I called, health records to see what I need to have my name removed. I sent them the documents and information they need. I went to DCSE, to talk to them about the situation, but they say I will get a summons on Jan or Feb if I don't make payments. I will go back to them on Monday to let them know that I want to get paternity test done and also I will be going to the court to have petition filed just in case. If you have any other suggestions please feel free to express them. I really value your views on this situation.

Thanks again.

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That makes absolutely no sense at all. Any divorce attorney would know that there are no steps that you can take to remove yourself from the birth certificate that are not part of the divorce proceedings.

I might have to go else where since I'm receiving wrong information. I'll check with them Monday and see what happens. I post back and let you know what happens.

Think the exact same thing. <- <- <-

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Quoting llworking

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That makes absolutely no sense at all. Any divorce attorney would know that there are no steps that you can take to remove yourself from the birth certificate that are not part of the divorce proceedings.

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I know it's not the OP's fault, but this child is TWO YEARS OLD...I cannot believe that someone would be able to just walk away from a two year old they've nurtured and loved. How...heartbreaking for this child.

I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking that, Christina!

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Quoting cbg

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I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking that, Christina!

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At least the child is young enough that they are unlikely to remember the OP later on...but yes, its sad.

No, at two, she should be able to remember enough. (personal experience speaking from someone who has an "ex parent" who was banished by the courts from my life at around that age) Mom is going to have a big mess to clean up here.

Dealing with this is one of the hardest things I ever had to deal with. When I first found out, I continue loving and doing the things as if nothing ever happen. Every time I look at pictures in my phone, I have a hard time dealing with it. People deal with things different. I thing it is best for me to leave now and not here be confused when the real father comes around.

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Quoting Bingo2030

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Dealing with this is one of the hardest things I ever had to deal with. When I first found out, I continue loving and doing the things as if nothing ever happen. Every time I look at pictures in my phone, I have a hard time dealing with it. People deal with things different. I thing it is best for me to leave now and not here be confused when the real father comes around.

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Well..what do you want to do?

Best for her, or best for you? (I do apologize. I am sorry you find yourself in this position, but now that you are...I feel that your child loves and needs you.)

I want the child to know who her father is and not be confused when she gets older. I don't mind giving to the child, but I will not be held for responsible for child support. As Christmas comes around, I will be giving gifts to the ex mother in law from me and tell her put from santa. This is how I'm handling it and I will not deviate from that. Like I said, everyone deals with things differently and sometimes it unfortunately kids have to suffer from decision their parents made.

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Quoting Bingo2030

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I want the child to know who her father is and not be confused when she gets older. I don't mind giving to the child, but I will not be held for responsible for child support. As Christmas comes around, I will be giving gifts to the ex mother in law from me and tell her put from santa. This is how I'm handling it and I will not deviate from that. Like I said, everyone deals with things differently and sometimes it unfortunately kids have to suffer from decision their parents made.

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That's the point though. You can't have your cake and eat it, too. Either you want to be a father to this child - in which case you're also on the hook to support her - or you don't.

There is a small part of me which is almost begging you to rethink this. You love the child. The child knows only you as Dad. The question of biology can be dealt with later.

But you're right. It's your choice, essentially.