Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
It was cute for a while? That your ex wanted to spend time with his children? Really?
Wow.
It is inconvenient for you and your kids for them to go out to dinner with their father once per month? Really?
You do realize that you are hurting not only your ex, but your children, right?
Having a good steady relationship with their father who loves them and wants to see them and spend time with them can only benefit them. But you won't allow that because of your "new life".
You really need to take a look at yourself. I'm not trying to be unkind, but I am telling you that you need to do what is best for your kids. Not what makes you the happiest. (and no, they are not one and the same in this instance.)
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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mmmagique
It was cute for a while? That your ex wanted to spend time with his children? Really?
Wow.
It is inconvenient for you and your kids for them to go out to dinner with their father once per month? Really?
You do realize that you are hurting not only your ex, but your children, right?
Having a good steady relationship with their father who loves them and wants to see them and spend time with them can only benefit them. But you won't allow that because of your "new life".
You really need to take a look at yourself. I'm not trying to be unkind, but I am telling you that you need to do what is best for your kids. Not what makes you the happiest. (and no, they are not one and the same in this instance.)
First, I never stated who the ex is. So no reason to be concerned with "father/mother" in this discussion. This is about a parent that left their kids to move on with life.
I appreciate what you are saying and I thought similarly early on, but the kids now agree that it's just easier this way. They have come to realize that things are just much simpler this way. If they wanted to see the other parent, they would surly say so, but quite honestly, they don't even really want to talk on the phone any more.
I'm sorry you have a problem with my approach with my children. To be honest, I am here only for the legal thought's and not the parenting guidance. I do say that with the utmost respect. Regardless, thank you for your comments.
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
Of course it's much simpler. It's just not right. (and an unbiased judge would see through your shenanigans...as will your kids when they are old enough to understand what is going on here.)
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
I appreciate anyone's opinions. However, I would still like anyone to help finish out the legal debate/questions previously posed in this discussion?
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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llworking
Evidence that your ex was the injured party.
Indication of a potential abuse of discretion...this is NOT something that any other judge I can imagine would use as a basis against dad. Why? Because it was EIGHT years ago.
Again...NOT something a judge would normally do. Reducing it to every other weekend often does happen, but removing his opportunity to have a dinner visit if he is in town is unprecedented.
All of that is WAY unprecedented.
The things I have quoted above are all very suggestive that the judge acted with bias and abused his discretion.
Changing it to every other weekend instead of three weekends a month is not unusual....and giving you guideline child support is not unusual. However, all of the rest of it is unusual enough, particularly since there seems to be evidence that YOU were the problem rather than dad, means that an appeal has the chance of succeeding.
Whoa. The fine details weren't present when I first responded! There are some MAJOR issues here.
The judge may well have shot both of you in the foot, OP.
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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Tryin2
I thought that a judge had the right and maybe even the responsibility to point out evidence (material change) even if it was not presented. Actually my attorney did question my ex about moving and addressed that it was not part of the original order. We just didn't file the law suit based on that. That was just part of a list of many things we were going to hit the ex with on the stand and see what had teeth. and the judge clarifies the 8 years part I'll mention that later.
oh this was easy, in the original order my ex was awarded one weekday evening each month (like the 2nd tues of each month or something) and my ex couldn't recall having exercised that visit on that specified day each month so because of not ever really exercising it, the judge felt there was no need to put it in the new order (my challenge was that a few times the ex would travel to town and go to parent teacher conferences or school events and would want to take the kids to dinner which was ok for a while but then it became burdensome when it was expected and it was turning into almost a monthly thing if not every 2-3 weeks)... It wasn't fair for me, my new spouse and the kids to have to rearrange our schedule just because the ex was making a trip to town, I had cut that out at least a year or two ago. The ex never used the "2nd tues Rule" so I didn't have to mess with it. As it turns out, that helped us.
A couple of things to your point. First, if what you say is correct, then I am just looking at maybe having to give the dinner visits back and maybe I can't make all the summer plans even during the ex's time.. But, wouldn't the ruling be (I forget the term, part remanded part affirmed) split, so I can still keep the every other weekend and the money? They would only change the parts that seemed biased right? I mean, I have read a few cases like that. On the eight years thing, the judge clearly states that since the ex moved like merely weeks after the original order, that the "nature of the original agreement" for joint custody was never as he understood it to be therefore there never should have been such an arrangement and because of that, there really never should have been "joint" custody. He therefore had no option but to rule in my favor. Sounds pretty solid to me. Not to mention, you can't really have joint custody living 2 hrs away. Right?
I don't want to argue with you as you have been helpful in making me think and realizing that while there are opinions that could go against me, there is really no hard evidence... I mean the emails and such, but trust me, most of them are my ex asking about things and I learned a long time ago to not put things in writing. Therefore my they just have a bunch of one sided emails with no response.
More importantly, it is really important to know that when we divorced, my ex tried at that time to take the kids. Dad got me a good lawyer (of course the same judge) and we put the fear of God into my ex. There was not much of a fight as my ex knew that if we were pressed, I could have very likely had sole custody right then and my ex would have been lucky to get one weekend a month. So my ex wisely complied, packed up a couch, bed, tv, clothes and a few kitchen items and was gone to start a new life. I will admit, I thought the ex would just kind of disappear and was surprised about the constant involvement with the kids. It was cute for a while, but like I said, it becomes a little over the top when someone's messing with your plans every weekend, etc. I mean, we have a new life now too. So trust me, my ex is no victim here. I could go into the evil things I dealt with prior to the divorce and you would not dare call my ex the victim of anything. But I get it, you only have this little info to go on.
You honestly don't realize how truly HORRIBLE you sound. If you were in front of a non-biased judge you would honestly get your butt handed to you.
I really think that the appeal is going to total you. If you are lucky yes, it will get remanded in part and affirmed in part, but if appears as biased to the higher courts as it appears to me, its quite possible that they could just throw the whole thing out entirely.
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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Dogmatique
Whoa. The fine details weren't present when I first responded! There are some MAJOR issues here.
The judge may well have shot both of you in the foot, OP.
Really??? Are you sure or are you jumping on the emotional bandwagon that I'm an evil parent? I mean, seriously everything that I have read may make it sound like I am an A** or something, but I don't see where any of this could truly be used against me or my case legally... I mean, this judge has been in place for many, many years. He can justify his decisions pretty clearly based on his opinion of my testimony vs the ex. How could they possibly prove his bias in my favor? Everything I've read so far is just opinion and even I know that personal opinion is not going to get play in an appellate court, if it's even recognized at all. So I just don't see the "legal" change of opinion regarding this case.
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llworking
You honestly don't realize how truly HORRIBLE you sound. If you were in front of a non-biased judge you would honestly get your butt handed to you.
I really think that the appeal is going to total you. If you are lucky yes, it will get remanded in part and affirmed in part, but if appears as biased to the higher courts as it appears to me, its quite possible that they could just throw the whole thing out entirely.
Look, I get it. Sorry for sounding "Horrible". I have obviously struck a cord. But everyone here is just getting emotionally charged and not looking at the facts. If anyone in my camp walked in and talked like this on the record, I'm done, I know. However, no one will. But given the "truth" of my situation, you still can't prove it to a higher court.
No offense, but I still await anyone to give me any LEGAL reason to be concerned. I am not here to make you understand why I do what I do for my kids I am here to get closure to being able to enjoy my ruling. From the 2 or 3 of you that have emotionally said what a bad person, you have also comforted me by showing me that you can't come up with any hard facts that could be used against me and you know the whole story... that's a lot more than they know!
Thanks and if Anyone else cares to prove me wrong, go for it! I'm feeling pretty strong with our camp.
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llworking
You honestly don't realize how truly HORRIBLE you sound. If you were in front of a non-biased judge you would honestly get your butt handed to you.
I really think that the appeal is going to total you. If you are lucky yes, it will get remanded in part and affirmed in part, but if appears as biased to the higher courts as it appears to me, its quite possible that they could just throw the whole thing out entirely.
You know, when I go back and read my comments, I realize, if I act humble about this all, does it change? If I played off as innocent and that I didn't know that the judge was absolutely giving me every benefit of the doubt and that I never realized that my dad and the judge spend at least 30 hours a week together, would this all be different? Or if I said that the ex didn't try to spend more time with the kids? Really? What does it matter?
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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Tryin2
Really??? Are you sure or are you jumping on the emotional bandwagon that I'm an evil parent? I mean, seriously everything that I have read may make it sound like I am an A** or something, but I don't see where any of this could truly be used against me or my case legally... I mean, this judge has been in place for many, many years. He can justify his decisions pretty clearly based on his opinion of my testimony vs the ex. How could they possibly prove his bias in my favor? Everything I've read so far is just opinion and even I know that personal opinion is not going to get play in an appellate court, if it's even recognized at all. So I just don't see the "legal" change of opinion regarding this case.
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Look, I get it. Sorry for sounding "Horrible". I have obviously struck a cord. But everyone here is just getting emotionally charged and not looking at the facts. If anyone in my camp walked in and talked like this on the record, I'm done, I know. However, no one will. But given the "truth" of my situation, you still can't prove it to a higher court.
No offense, but I still await anyone to give me any LEGAL reason to be concerned. I am not here to make you understand why I do what I do for my kids I am here to get closure to being able to enjoy my ruling. From the 2 or 3 of you that have emotionally said what a bad person, you have also comforted me by showing me that you can't come up with any hard facts that could be used against me and you know the whole story... that's a lot more than they know!
Thanks and if Anyone else cares to prove me wrong, go for it! I'm feeling pretty strong with our camp.
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You know, when I go back and read my comments, I realize, if I act humble about this all, does it change? If I played off as innocent and that I didn't know that the judge was absolutely giving me every benefit of the doubt and that I never realized that my dad and the judge spend at least 30 hours a week together, would this all be different? Or if I said that the ex didn't try to spend more time with the kids? Really? What does it matter?
I am not getting emotionally charged at all. I am being completely dispassionate here.
The kinds of things that you are saying here almost make it look like you are the other parent trying to see how strong your appeal would be. Everything you are saying is tailor made to give the other side the advantage in showing that the judge was biased and abused his discretion. I couldn't write a more textbook case of bias than what you are presenting. I being totally serious here.
Like I said the every other weekend bit and the guideline child support were quite normal and not unusual at all, but EVERYTHING else was just unprecedented.
Plus, the way you are describing yourself and your opinions isn't striking cords, its the kind of things that we see people say who get absolutely totaled in court.
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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Tryin2
Really??? Are you sure or are you jumping on the emotional bandwagon that I'm an evil parent? I mean, seriously everything that I have read may make it sound like I am an A** or something, but I don't see where any of this could truly be used against me or my case legally... I mean, this judge has been in place for many, many years. He can justify his decisions pretty clearly based on his opinion of my testimony vs the ex. How could they possibly prove his bias in my favor? Everything I've read so far is just opinion and even I know that personal opinion is not going to get play in an appellate court, if it's even recognized at all. So I just don't see the "legal" change of opinion regarding this case.
You ARE acting like an ass. You're not worried about any children - you're worried about you.
You have no idea the trouble you might have gladly put yourself in, do you?
Heck, I'd sell popcorn to go along with this inevitable trouncing :cool:
Re: Could There Be a Judicial Prejudice Opnion and Legal Comments Welcome
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llworking
I am not getting emotionally charged at all. I am being completely dispassionate here.
The kinds of things that you are saying here almost make it look like you are the other parent trying to see how strong your appeal would be. Everything you are saying is tailor made to give the other side the advantage in showing that the judge was biased and abused his discretion. I couldn't write a more textbook case of bias than what you are presenting. I being totally serious here.
Like I said the every other weekend bit and the guideline child support were quite normal and not unusual at all, but EVERYTHING else was just unprecedented.
Plus, the way you are describing yourself and your opinions isn't striking cords, its the kind of things that we see people say who get absolutely totaled in court.
Fair enough. To the point of me sounding like the other party? I am to a point. I simply want to exhaust most everything that the ex would try to throw at me. The joy of winning is as pure as gold. But the wide open description of the relationships and their potential impact on any appeal is to see if anyone can turn any of it into real world evidence to overthrow a judge's decision.
In the end, dad's buddy may have been over zealous in his ruling in my favor. As I think I stated earlier, that was possibly my biggest concern. But in the grand scheme of things, the ex might get the tues dinners back and maybe I loose full control over the summer break, but there is really no reason to believe that I loose my new time and the children don't loose the financial support.
On a side note, the one that I don't think anyone answered or I missed it, the ex being two hours away is the easiest part of ensuring I don't loose, right? There simply is NO way they could make us go back to joint with that distance correct?
Thanks again for the, yet suspicious, un emotional response to my questions.