Consequences of a Temporary Change of Custody
My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Tennessee
Hello,
I was wanting to get some advice about a current situation. Me and my ex have a 6 year old daughter. I have full custody, he has visitation, I get child support etc...
Well, we had her when we were teenagers and he didnt see her much, but maintained an ok relationship with her. When he couldnt afford insurance or child support he joined the Military. He is stationed in California. In the past three years we both have gotten married to other people. Our daughter has lived with me and my husband the last 3 years. Her dad did not see her for 2 years. He said it was for financial reasons, couldnt come back here to see her, and not having enough leave, etc... Whatever his excuse was.
He came into town on Monday and asked to see her for fall break. I agreed to let her stay with him and his wife at her parents house for a few nights. Well they have done fun stuff, she had a great time, and the mental picture she had of her daddy, apparently is coming true for her. He has admitted to me that he was not the best father in the past but he is older now and more mature and wishes to spend more time with her, etc..
Well he is going back to Cali in a few days and she wants to go with him, because they havent had much time with him.
I talked this over with my mother about getting a temporary order stating that she can be with him until the school year ends, and me suspending child support until she comes back.
He really wants a chance to be a good father to her and most of all I want my child to be happy.
So my question being, if I get a temporary order for her to spend the rest of the school year with him, and agree to suspend child support, can he then sue me for child support and could it hurt me later, if he decides to sue me for custody?
I dont want to lose my daughter, she is my pride and joy, but I also dont wanna deprive her or him of having more time together.
Advice?
Re: Some Advice on a Child Custody and Support Issue
It won't hurt you exactly, but if she's there long enough Dad can absolutely file for custody and child support.
Re: Some Advice on a Child Custody and Support Issue
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Quoting
Dogmatique
It won't hurt you exactly, but if she's there long enough Dad can absolutely file for custody and child support.
Yes but that is why i said that i would sign a temporary order stating she had to come back at the end of the school year, also stating that I still have full custody but just suspending the child support. My question was would the temporary order hurt me if he were to try and sue me for custody at the end of the school year when she is supposed to be back.
Re: Some Advice on a Child Custody and Support Issue
If dad has the child, then you should be sending him support, not just suspending him paying you. Surely you've already planned on that.
By "signing a temporary order," do you mean that you and dad would sign an agreement together, or do you mean that you would get a judge to sign it? If it's just something you and dad get together and sign, it won't be worth all that much come June next year. I doubt also that you would find it easy to get a judge to sign off on that, but even if he does, that doesn't mean that it would stick next June either. You see, by next June eight months will have gone by with the child living with dad. That gives dad the upper hand, truly, provided she does reasonably well in school and such. So if, in June, dad decides that he doesn't want to send daughter back to you, be files his own petition for custody. We don't really like to do odds here, but if I had to bet, my money would probably be on dad at that point. And really, that's as it should be. Courts don't care for the flip-flop routine. Either you and dad agree that daughter should live in California, or you don't.
It's really wonderful that you want your child to develop her relationship with her father, and it's great that he seems to want the same. You seem very well-intentioned, and that's applaudable. But if I were in your shoes, I'd be finding some other way to make that happen. Christmas break, summer . . .
Re: Some Advice on a Child Custody and Support Issue
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Quoting
katensity
Yes but that is why i said that i would sign a temporary order stating she had to come back at the end of the school year, also stating that I still have full custody but just suspending the child support. My question was would the temporary order hurt me if he were to try and sue me for custody at the end of the school year when she is supposed to be back.
Which part of my response was unclear?