My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Maryland. I'm in the very beginning stages of divorce, literally just having the conversation today. I know in my heart I do want a divorce so a reconciliation isn't going to happen. We live in Maryland but my family is in Georgia. So if I'm going to leave with my one year old, I have no place to live unless I leave the state. I have no job, automobile or money so no ties to this state except husband. Question is, until this is sorted out, can I take my baby to Georgia without a custody order? I don't want to "kidnapp" my child. We just don't have a place to live because I don't want to live in the same house anymore.
How to Move with Child Out of State Before Divorce
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09-09-2013, 08:41 AMFutureExHow to Move with Child Out of State Before Divorce
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09-09-2013, 08:48 AMAntigoneRe: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before DivorceNo one can stop you from leaving the State of MD; however, dad could go to court and get an order to have the child brought back. I suggest you handle this situation by speaking to your STBX about your plans.Quote:
Quoting FutureEx
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09-09-2013, 08:54 AMaardvarcRe: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before Divorce
Problem is that the minute he suspects you'll be leaving, he can seek an emergency order to STOP you. Well, not YOU, but not allowing you to take the child WITH you. If you manage to get out of the state with the child, he can ask the court to order that the child be returned until court orders for custody/visitation are put in place. If that happens, then while the divorce works its way through the system, time with dad as primary care taker accumulates, and you end up being the "out of town" parent seeking custody - a major uphill battle.
Divorce courts are generally prepared to keep a roof over the heads of primary caretakers and children. What's wrong with you and the child staying where you are while you get the divorce process started and orders in place, and letting HIM figure out some alternative for the short term? Then once some initial orders are set out, THEN making the move? It's really the only way to not expose the child to a long, expensive, legal tug of war that can favor the non-moving parent. -
09-09-2013, 10:26 AMjustamom1Re: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before Divorce
Hi, I'm not an attorney but I have gone through this issue for a temp relocation directly after the divorce.
He most likely is going to object just as my ex did. You must show the court that you can provide for the child best back in GA. Utilize many aspects such as family net-works if you do not have any family net-works in MD. That is a wonderful reason alone when you have been fully supported by your spouse for many years. Plan to reeducate yourself and that your family intends to help you reach that goal by offering child care and emotional support. Also provide your ex with logistics on the area such as schools, activities for children etc. You need to show how the area itself will best benefit the child. Another aspect to know is that you desire relocation which means the father would have travel expenses. Be prepared to pay a portion if not all of the expense for his travel.
Do not leave the state right now. The first step is to see if MD has a procedure that will require your husband to support you during the divorce. Many states do have this available for the primary care taker. If you leave it will be difficult to go back fourth to MD for hearings, etc...
Relocating is not hard unless the father can show that you intend to keep him from his child. Don't be ugly about it at all. You would be surprise how easily a father will agree once they know you do not intend to harm the relationship with the child.
My divorce was ugly ugly ugly as most divorces can be. Just focus on best interest of child and never never stop the father from visits.
OH and as I just learned.... detail details details in the custody order.. what to do when he is late, when it is a forfeit, and make up days will serve you well... my mistake in my divorce was not having details about everything... -
09-09-2013, 11:41 AMDogmatiqueRe: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before DivorceQuote:
Quoting justamom1
Relocating is not hard? I suggest you start reading.
There is a fair number of States in which the burden is on the relocating parent to convince the court - and this can be a nightmare. In those states, the non relocating parent doesn't have to do a darned thing. It's ALL on the parent wishing to relocate. -
09-09-2013, 02:14 PMFatherWhoWonRe: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before Divorce
JaM1, you assume a lot to say that the father will "easily agree" to the child moving out of state if mom decides to show her friendly face. You assume a lot to think the father doesn't want custody of his child.
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09-09-2013, 09:14 PMgator1Re: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before Divorce
What you need to do is speak to more than one family law attorney in your area, before deciding on who should handle your divorce. They should be able to offer you a preliminary assessment of your ability to relocate your child based upon the facts you give them and the temperament of the local judges on relocation.
As of now you are free to go anywhere with the child. The father is unlikely to get any emergency orders unless he can show the child is in danger. As a practical matter, he must first file for divorce and get a standard restraining order prohibiting the child from moving out of state.
Your attorney can best advise you on all of your options, and any advantages of you filing for divorce first. -
09-09-2013, 09:26 PMDogmatiqueRe: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before DivorceQuote:
Quoting gator1
Dad doesn't have to file for divorce first. All he needs to do is march down to the court house and file for custody based upon a significant change of circumstances. It's not uncommon for the relocating parent to be ordered to return the child to home state pending the outcome of the custody dispute.
Frankly Mom's reasons don't even come close to justifying removing the child from home state and in MD, the burden of proof lies with Mom.
If Mom goes ahead, I hope she can afford to come back and forth to Maryland and can afford to fork out (should she be allowed to relocate the child) for Dad's transportation costs.
There is another option, but it tends to be less than popular.
Mom can move wherever she wants - but the child stays with Dad. -
09-10-2013, 11:09 AMgator1Re: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before DivorceHuh??? A significant change of circumstances of WHAT?? There must be an underlying cause of action and a prior order to argue "change of circumstance" since the rendition of the last order.Quote:
Quoting Dogmatique
Please elaborate on the basis of your claim that dad can simply march down to the courthouse in this instance and have a court order his wife return their child to the state, without need to file a petition for divorce. -
09-10-2013, 01:00 PMllworkingRe: Want to Move with Child Out of State Before DivorceYou may have a point...but its going to vary by state. In many states its not necessary to file for divorce in order to file for emergency custody. And mom leaving dad and removing the child from the state could easily constitute an emergency.Quote:
Quoting gator1