Mother Wants to Relocate Against Father's Wishes, No Parenting Plan in Effect

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: FL

-Child lived with both parents for approx. 20 mos.
-Father on birth certificate, no paternity test.
-Mother is disabled but has had sole physical custody of child for 5 years. Child is 5 now.
-No parenting plan was established when child support was ordered and enforced by court. Unsure why this did not happen.
-Mother has refused to sign plan brought by Father repeatedly, but, has excellent relationship with father and allows him to see child whenever he wants,
overnights, alternating holidays etc etc. Dad's visitation is extremely liberal.
-Mother wants to relocate to a Northern state as about to get married to long term partner in professional field.
-Child will be able to attend better schools, etc etc.
-Father does not want this although Mother has no issues with allowing ample visitations, absorbing travel costs etc.
-Neither Mother nor Father are in anyway unfit (although Mother is disabled)
-Father consistently pays child support as it is drafted out immediately.

Can Mother leave the state permanently without Father's express permission? How should Mother approach this? Father refuses to discuss this reasonably and stonewalls at every turn.

Thanks much, sorry for bizarre wording. Trying to stick to the facts. :)

Is Dad going to lose ANY time with the child?

Florida requires a custodial parent to petition the court when moving the child 50 miles or more from the primary residence for a minimum of 60 days. The statute makes no distinction between moving the child within the state or to another state when defining the need for a request to relocate.

Factors in Decision: The child's relationship with the relocating parent as well as her relationship with the other parent and any other parties in her life is examined by the court. The age and preference of the child is considered, along with the economic situation of the parties.

Dad does not need mom to sign a parenting/visitation plan. Dad needs a judge to sign it.

Dad has the right to object to the move. So if dad does not agree, she will need the court's permission to relocate. She will be able to make her case for why the move is in the best interest of the child in court.

Florida has a shifting burden of proof; if the relocating parent can prove their case, the burden shifts to the non-relocating parent to prove that the move is NOT in the best interests of the child.

statute here

Quote:

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Quoting YellowBird112

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-No parenting plan was established when child support was ordered and enforced by court. Unsure why this did not happen.

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It would appear that it didn't happen because dad never ASKED for a visitation plan. Child support and visitation are two separate issues, and the courts don't go looking for things to do. Dad should have sought a parenting plan/visitation order way back then. Had he sought visitation, the court would have automatically addressed support, but it doesn't work the other way around. Child support is a right of the child, and the courts act in the child's interest to ensure support orders are in place. The onus to seek visitation is on the parent (since, sadly, so many parents are perfectly fine with NOT having visitation, and only pay support because the courts FORCE the obligation upon them). It sounds like he has never felt the need to seek a plan, since his visitation was liberal and relatively uneventful and it sounds like both sides have had smooth sailing - until now, when the advent of mom moving will either force him to seek a plan and either oppose the move, or negotiate a plan that addresses time and expenses, taking the new distances into account. Or he can leave things status quo (at mom's mercy), but may find himself in the position of having a long road ahead if he attempts to object AFTER the fact, without ever having had an original plan in place all along. This is exactly why we continually tell people that when it comes to visitation, court orders protect EVERYBODY - and frankly, dad would be a fool to NOT get his rights spelled out via the courts. Until the COURT gives mom boundaries, rules, or marching orders, she's really only obligated to her conscience.

Quote:

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Quoting Dogmatique

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Florida has a shifting burden of proof; if the relocating parent can prove their case, the burden shifts to the non-relocating parent to prove that the move is NOT in the best interests of the child.

statute here

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Thank you for the statute link.

Essentially, a certified letter, as detailed in statute linked above, leaves Dad with 20 days to come up with cash to file for a custody hearing? I believe it's 400 to file yourself in FL. I've heard the parent that files first often has the upper hand but, that most judges are still sexist and favor mom.

I think it would reflect poorly on me (mom) to do this sort of smash and grab maneuver in court. However, I may be applying emotions where I shouldn't.

Dad would lose some time, yes. However, I am very willing to give him all school, holiday and summer breaks. I am also more than willing to revisit this when our child is 12. As of now, the no-bedtime, constant video game exposure etc does not gel with my values. I don't even have a tv. He goes to bed at 7 at home. We don't watch violent programs here.

I am more than aware the above criticisms of his father don't mean a whit in the court's eyes.

What would be my (mom) best course of action? I do not want to traumatize anyone but Dad refuses to discuss this. We speak about everything else and are actually very close.

Should I file or do I have technical legal custody already?

You must follow the law.

You're correct - your ideas on Dad's parenting are completely irrelevant in court. He's allowed to let them stay up and play video games if he wishes.

Florida is actually one of the more progressive states when it comes to Father's Rights. It's a myth that most judges favor the female parent. Ownership of the uterus does not make a whit of difference these days (and rightly so).

You haven't indicated, however, why the move would be in the best interest of the child/ren. You may have to make a decision - relocate without the child, or stay put.

Quote:

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Quoting Dogmatique

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You must follow the law.

You're correct - your ideas on Dad's parenting are completely irrelevant in court. He's allowed to let them stay up and play video games if he wishes.

Florida is actually one of the more progressive states when it comes to Father's Rights. It's a myth that most judges favor the female parent. Ownership of the uterus does not make a whit of difference these days (and rightly so).

You haven't indicated, however, why the move would be in the best interest of the child/ren. You may have to make a decision - relocate without the child, or stay put.

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I believe it would help my son because he currently is zoned for an F school in a rough area and my new husband's salary is double his father's. He could go to the excellent public school in the zone we would live in or private if we choose. He will be able to enjoy an appropriate number of after school activities.

I believe I am the more fit parent. For reasons that are mostly philosophical and need not be detailed here. I think it's incredibly important that he has been in my uncontested custody this entire time. I have traded off entire years of holidays with dad. Last year was his- Christmas, birthday, thanksgiving, everything. I have moved closer to dad to make it less expensive for him to see his son. I did this last August of my own accord and (obviously) at my own expense.

His dad is a good dad, I have no intention of using this move to alienate him. I just feel I can offer my son more as far as education and experience goes by relocating with him during the school year.

I also kind of feel that the burden is on him to protect his own rights. I've been very generous because I love my son and I respect his Dad. However, he needs to shell out the bucks and get some legal advice. I did when he tried to get me to sign a parenting plan.

I'm sorry if that makes me sound like Satan.