Vacation Request

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Minnesota
Currently my ex has supervised visitation, however the Parenting Consultant will be making the change in the upcoming week to unsupervised visitation. The current parenting time schedule is every Tues, Thurs 6-8, every Sat 1-5. Our court order states that vacation and holiday schedule is determined by the Parenting Consultant.

I need help in writing a letter to the PC and my Ex requesting permission to take my daughters on a vacation from March 27-April 6. The research I've seen says that vacation time takes precedence over regular parenting time. My decree does not have a holiday or vacation prevision in it, it simply states that the PC will decide. So I want to know if there would be any reason the PC or my Ex would be able to deny my vacation request, and would I be required to make up the hours that my ex would lose?

Thank you

Is there any reason? Any conceivable reason that might exist, based upon facts that are completely unknown to us? Of course.

But theoretical reasons why the parenting consultant might say "no" are not likely to be relevant to your situation. The decision is going to turn on the facts and history of your case.

My case is very complex with a lot of history. The facts are that the NCP has been on Supervised visitation since the onset of this case 7/09. The J & D says he gets 8 hours of visitation per week. I am asking about vacation, because I dont want to have to make up his time that he loses when I take the children on a vacation to the Grand Canyon.

Ok, so I realize that the PC could reject anything that I would propose, but doesn't she have to have a reason? I have not requested vacation time with children for two years. The reason I have a feeling that they will reject my request, is because it is over Easter.

Here is the short a sweet letter that I wrote to both the PC and my EX.

I need to plan in advance for travel purposes, so I am requesting vacation time during the girls spring break which begins March 27 - April 7th.

If there is a better way to write my request, please help...

We can't help you write the letter.

But why don't you want to give him make up time? Isn't that the reasonable thing to do?

I had this happen to me recently. I offered my ex make up time PLUS several extra hours of time so that I could go see my family during a family get-together. He sent a counter request asking for nearly THREE DAYS of extra time (and I'm pumping milk for a newborn, so that wasn't reasonable). Because I did not give him that much extra time, he denied my request. He said no to the extra time because I would not give him extra-extra time. I could not go visit my family.

So, you see, it often doesn't matter what you do. There are several reasons they could say no. But I would say offer him both make-up time and extra time and I hope things go better for you than they did for me.

Shortie,
I hear what your saying... these types of manipulative men get their jollies out of refusing anything that would be in the best interest of the child, and instead makes the issue about making life miserable for the Mom...

I'm curious if you have a provision in your J&D for vacation time? I have read other comments about agreements for each parent to have two to three weeks of vacation that are FREE and clear without the need for make up time... Don't you have anything in your J&D that states that?

I must be the only idiot that didn't write language in my J&D for vacation... My ex is the most unreasonable person in terms of being flexible with his parenting time even when it comes to the children and their activities that overlap his parenting time. Do you really think I need to offer extra time? Our visitation schedule is not like the average schedule. My ex's visitation and has always been supervised for good reasons documented by CPS and the police... So I might as well not even ask him which is why I am asking the Parenting Consultant instead. I am hoping that she will see my request as reasonable.

Any other suggestions on what the best way to request vacation time would be?

But he's about to get UNSUPERVISED visitation.

And now you're wanting to infringe on that, for your vacation, without offering make up time.

I'm not seeing that as being terribly reasonable of you - sorry.

But it's dad who wants to make mom's life miserable :).

Mom, I too think your request for vacation time is 100% completely reasonable. I, too, would tell you to go fly a kite if you thought so little of my time with my children that you didn't want to offer any make-up time. My guess is that the parenting coordinator will also see you as the unreasonable one if you continue to be so selfish on this point.

Does your pc report back to the judge the next time you appear in court?

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Quoting FatherWhoWon

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But it's dad who wants to make mom's life miserable :).

Mom, I too think your request for vacation time is 100% completely reasonable. I, too, would tell you to go fly a kite if you thought so little of my time with my children that you didn't want to offer any make-up time. My guess is that the parenting coordinator will also see you as the unreasonable one if you continue to be so selfish on this point.

Does your pc report back to the judge the next time you appear in court?

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*whine* I don't know whether you're being sarcastic or you're misreading *whine* :p

Quote:

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Quoting Dogmatique

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*whine* I don't know whether you're being sarcastic or you're misreading *whine* :p

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I don't get it? I think maybe I've had too much kid-free weekend and its gone to my head. I'm not comprehending written English I guess.

Some of that tea and crumpets you're famous for might be just what I need.