DHS Says Arrears Are Paid, But They Were Not

My question involves child support in the State of:

I live in Bristol, TN. where my case is handled, and my so-called father lives 10 minutes across town in Bristol, VA. Our local child support office is a joke. They're rude, say they can never help with the simplest of things, lie, and have done nothing to enforce the case; no arrests, tax interception (which they try to say we're not entitled to, yet the handbook says otherwise), license revocation, absolutely nothing. He's a convicted felon with numerous drug charges (possession, distribution), all of which he's served time for (not all of it because he narks), but they won't hold him for failure to pay. They say they can never find him, even though he's been on probation for 20-some-years and all they'd have to do is call the PO. When we have found him and DHS the address, they'll send officers with bench warrants a time or two, but after someone tells them he isn't there (even with his car outside) they just give up. I don't see how he's not been arrested during probation meetings either, because failure to pay’s a violation.

The thing is, I turned 19 in Nov. and he owes 12-13 years' worth of arrears, at least 40-some-thousand. On my 18th birthday, we were told by DHS that the payments wouldn't stop until he'd paid all these years of arrears in full, and the State wouldn’t forgive them. My mom contacted them yesterday because we’ve only received 2 payments since my 18th birthday which weren't even close to the ordered amount, and the lady told her that "the case will be closed because the arrears have been paid in full." That of course, is a lie, especially since we didn't receive the first payment until I was 9 and mom filed for support before I was a year old. We've only received $197 since I turned 18, and that's sure not $40k.
Not only can we not get anything done because of all the bull from DHS, it’s almost impossible for me to get my mom to attempt to get them to enforce it, and most of the time when I ask her to call it turns into an argument. The only thing I don’t have an issue getting her to do is go to the court dates, which are once in a blue moon. They had a court date this past Jan. 3rd, and she told me he said he would send in some money, but we’ve still yet to receive it, so again, how could it possibly be paid off?

It’s like mom’s afraid she’s gonna hurt his feeling if she tries to get it pursued and gets defensive (he’s not violent, she’s not afraid of him), I’ve been asking since I was 17 to have the case put into my name from hers when I turned 18, so DHS will talk to me, but we’d have to go to the office, which I can’t get her to do. That being, 95% of the time, I have to call DHS and tell them I’m her to try to get something done (even though it doesn’t work). We can’t afford to retain a lawyer and I’ve called Legal Aid, but they won’t take it, so I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried to get ahold of someone at the Nashville headquarters, but can’t ever get in touch with anyone. Either I just get an automated recording of terms, or if I get someone, the person I need to talk to isn’t in, and even after leaving several messages no one has called me back. I just don’t know what to do.

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Quoting Kelsea

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My question involves child support in the State of:

I live in Bristol, TN. where my case is handled, and my so-called father lives 10 minutes across town in Bristol, VA. Our local child support office is a joke. They're rude, say they can never help with the simplest of things, lie, and have done nothing to enforce the case; no arrests, tax interception (which they try to say we're not entitled to, yet the handbook says otherwise), license revocation, absolutely nothing. He's a convicted felon with numerous drug charges (possession, distribution), all of which he's served time for (not all of it because he narks), but they won't hold him for failure to pay. They say they can never find him, even though he's been on probation for 20-some-years and all they'd have to do is call the PO. When we have found him and DHS the address, they'll send officers with bench warrants a time or two, but after someone tells them he isn't there (even with his car outside) they just give up. I don't see how he's not been arrested during probation meetings either, because failure to pay’s a violation.

The thing is, I turned 19 in Nov. and he owes 12-13 years' worth of arrears, at least 40-some-thousand. On my 18th birthday, we were told by DHS that the payments wouldn't stop until he'd paid all these years of arrears in full, and the State wouldn’t forgive them. My mom contacted them yesterday because we’ve only received 2 payments since my 18th birthday which weren't even close to the ordered amount, and the lady told her that "the case will be closed because the arrears have been paid in full." That of course, is a lie, especially since we didn't receive the first payment until I was 9 and mom filed for support before I was a year old. We've only received $197 since I turned 18, and that's sure not $40k.
Not only can we not get anything done because of all the bull from DHS, it’s almost impossible for me to get my mom to attempt to get them to enforce it, and most of the time when I ask her to call it turns into an argument. The only thing I don’t have an issue getting her to do is go to the court dates, which are once in a blue moon. They had a court date this past Jan. 3rd, and she told me he said he would send in some money, but we’ve still yet to receive it, so again, how could it possibly be paid off?

It’s like mom’s afraid she’s gonna hurt his feeling if she tries to get it pursued and gets defensive (he’s not violent, she’s not afraid of him), I’ve been asking since I was 17 to have the case put into my name from hers when I turned 18, so DHS will talk to me, but we’d have to go to the office, which I can’t get her to do. That being, 95% of the time, I have to call DHS and tell them I’m her to try to get something done (even though it doesn’t work). We can’t afford to retain a lawyer and I’ve called Legal Aid, but they won’t take it, so I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried to get ahold of someone at the Nashville headquarters, but can’t ever get in touch with anyone. Either I just get an automated recording of terms, or if I get someone, the person I need to talk to isn’t in, and even after leaving several messages no one has called me back. I just don’t know what to do.

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Kelsea, this is an issue between your mother and father and is NOT something you should be involved in. Yes, its true that arrears do not just "go away" when a child turns 18, and if there are/were arrears, they should still be there. But they are not owed to you, and will not be payable to you ever. You should not be calling pretending you are your mother! I have no idea why they would say that the arrears are all paid now, but again, it is for your mother to deal with and is none of your business. Perhaps there have been things discussed between your mother and father that she doesn't want you to know. Regardless, it is her situation, and only her situation, to deal with, and your level of involvement in it is not good at all. You describe the situation as "my case," but its just not.

Agree.

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It’s like mom’s afraid she’s gonna hurt his feeling if she tries to get it pursued

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If mom wants the money enough to put forth the effort, then she'll pursue it. The money is due to HER, and it's HER issue to address or ignore.