How to Stop Charges from Going to Court Based on Incorrect Reporting

My question involves criminal law for the state of: Georgia

I was intoxicated and got in a physical altercation with my boyfriend. The next day, I saw my bruises, and not having a clear memory of the night, thought that he had hurt me while restraining me. The day after the incident I went to the cops and reported my memory of the night, and of him restraining me. After talking to witnesses, it turns out that I was falling all over the place and bruised myself. Now I also know that he was restraining me to avoid me hurting him, because I apparently attacked him. However, the cops pressed charges, and now that I am trying to have them dropped, am informed that I cannot, because I did not press them. Because of my level of inebriation that night I basically gave a false report. What do I do? I cannot have him face criminal charges that were not accurate.

Crimes, even domestic violence, are considered to be committed against ALL members of society, not just the immediate victim - thus it is the STATE who brings the charges in a criminal case, not the victims.


You can always attempt to contact the prosecutor's office and give them an updated version of events, but given your drunken state at the time, your credibility is already stretched, and prosecutors understand that some 85% of victims try to get charges dropped for a variety of reasons, so they're pretty good at nodding in understanding, and then bringing charges anyway. The fact that he restrained you may be enough for charges to continue - even if he was restraining you for "noble" purposes to stop you from hurting yourself, or in self defense to prevent you from hurting him. Usually the offense of battery, which usually covers restraint, only requires (a) restraint (b) against wishes of the victim. Strangely enough, it's just like grabbing someone to stop them from driving drunk - which also results in more people than you'd think being arrested for battery. For his own sake, if he felt he was being attacked and put his hands on you in self defense, HE should have called police as the victim as should your friends standing around watching this physical confrontation. Yes, you might have been arrested, but when things turn violent, SOMEONE is likely to be wearing handcuffs - that he chose not to report your violence, and you chose to report his restraint of you is indeed unfortunate and perhaps not just, but that's really the set of circumstances in play here. If your friends are willing to set the record straing by telling police or prosecutors that they witnessed him defending himself from you, that may lessen the state's zeal to pursue charges against him - while at the same time opening YOU to arrest for domestic violence. Bottom line is that you've got injuries from an altercation with a boyfriend - ONE of you is likely to end up under arrest.

There are TWO things you can do:

1) find and pay for the best criminal defense attorney you can find for him (since he is the one currently facing charges, if YOU get charged with domestic violence, retain that attorney for yourself)

2) consider getting yourself some alcohol intervention - drinking yourself stupid and hurting people who care about you never ends well for the drinker in the long run (it really can lead to a terribly lonely life for you- so get whatever help you need to nip any alcohol problem in the bud)

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Quoting crist0968

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After talking to witnesses, it turns out that I was falling all over the place and bruised myself.

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These witnesses also saw the scuffle?

Bruises from falling and bruises from being hit tend to occur in different locations on the body, and tend to look different. Pictures were taken? If so, I expect that your boyfriend's lawyer is already looking at them (or soon will be) to see if they substantiate the version of the story in which you were falling down.

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Quoting crist0968

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Now I also know that he was restraining me to avoid me hurting him, because I apparently attacked him.

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It's reasonable to assume that he would have explained that to the police at the time of his arrest, yet the prosecutor charged him anyway.

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It's reasonable to assume that he would have explained that to the police at the time of his arrest, yet the prosecutor charged him anyway.

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I did not know at the time of the arrest that I had attacked him. My memory was flashes until him restraining me. I have tried talking to the police, the same ones i filed the report with, and they do not believe that I am not trying to protect him and go back on my word based on guilt. It is that I now know that I was in the wrong. How do I convince the D.A. that I do not believe he intended to hurt me based on what I know, and not based on guilt?

That was about him, not about you. You're not claiming that he was blacking out. Nothing would have stopped him from telling this story to the police at the time of his arrest.

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Quoting Mr. Knowitall

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That was about him, not about you. You're not claiming that he was blacking out. Nothing would have stopped him from telling this story to the police at the time of his arrest.

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That is another question I have. Wasn't there supposed to be an investigation done to prove that my story was correct? I ask because the cops showed up at his place, asked him if he had been in an altercation with me, and all that he admitted was that we had an argument and that things had gotten out of hand, however they refused to hear his side and that he was acting in self defense nor acknowledge the bruises all over his ribs and sternum. Once he admitted to having an argument with me they arrested him on the spot, did not read him his miranda rights (he did not hear his rights until his release from jail), and took him to jail. If they had given him a chance to tell his side of the story, for he was not intoxicated, I feel like there would have been a chance of me and the police understanding that my intoxicated memory of the night was wrong before he was taken to jail. I honestly feel like there was bias in that they took my side/story without question knowing that I was drunk, and when I went to the police about dropping the charges due to inaccurate information on my behalf due to my level of intoxication, they refused to drop them for fear that he would turn around and press charges against them, and they tried to have me sign a statement saying that I had given a false report and take me to jail for lying. I do not feel that I lied, for what I stated on the original report was what I honestly believed had happened based on flashes between my blackout moments, however, they knew that I was highly intoxicated that night, and were pressuring me to place together as many details as possible, which was what I did. It also does not seem to matter that there is a witness that was there that night that is willing to testify on their behalf, for they did not bother trying to find witnesses before the arrest, nor when I went back to them stating that there was a witness who saw the occurrence and my actions.
So, basically I need help understanding the process. Was there sufficient evidence for them to arrest him without doing an investigation to verify that my story was even correct? Also, if he were to sign and notarize a document stating that he would not press charges against them if they dropped their charges, would they accept it (due to the fact that there wasn't sufficient evidence, aka one drunk woman's memory against a sober man and a sober witness, and that there is no longer a key witness that wants to testify and pursue this)?

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Quoting crist0968

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Wasn't there supposed to be an investigation done to prove that my story was correct?

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That's what court is for.

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Quoting eerelations

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That's what court is for.

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Is there any way I can stop this before it goes to court? I just want it dropped. It was all a big misunderstanding of what actually happened..

No. There is NOTHING you can do that will stop this going to court. You can contact the prosecutor's office and tell them what you've told us, but it will be HIS choice whether to proceed or not. There is NOTHING you can do that will force him to withdraw the charges. It is the prosecutor's choice and no one else's.

I hope this is now clear to you.

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Quoting cbg

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No. There is NOTHING you can do that will stop this going to court. You can contact the prosecutor's office and tell them what you've told us, but it will be HIS choice whether to proceed or not. There is NOTHING you can do that will force him to withdraw the charges. It is the prosecutor's choice and no one else's.

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I do have a better understanding now, unfortunately. However, is there any advice you can give me about how to go about telling him? It is my understanding that a lot of women try to get these cases dropped because they feel guilt, and I certainly do not want to give him that impression. I also do not want to get myself thrown in jail for giving a false report, however I do feel that my memory and report from that night was wrong due to my heavy intoxication.
How might be the best way to go about admitting that I was in the wrong and that I believe my boyfriend was acting in self defense, and did not intend to harm me, and that I do not want to have his future destroyed as the result of a drunken misunderstanding? Please, if there is any advice you can give me, it would be greatly appreciated.