Birthday and Holiday Visitation

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: TN

Hey guys. I have a question for a friend. I know we don't usually like to give 3rd party advice, but I just wanted to make sure that I told him the right thing.

The father and mother of 2 children are divorced. In their divorce decree (he brought it over for me to read it the other day) it states that the father is to have the children EOW, 2 weeks in the summer, and for their birthdays either the 1st half or 2nd half of the day (2pm - 8pm) which alternates each year. It also states that he gets them for alternating holidays beginning the night before at 6pm.

The problem that he is having is that he let the mother know that he will be picking the children up for his daughter's birthday (which is the day before Thanksgiving) and returning them on Sunday (this weekend happens to be his regular weekend). When he told her this, she stated that he had to bring the kids back the day of his youngest's birthday.

The way I interpreted the order is that yes, he would have to return the child if the order did not specifically state that he gets them the day before Thanksgiving at 6pm until that Friday at 6pm. She is ok with him having them for the Thanksgiving holiday until Sunday, she just wants them back for the few hours on her birthday. He would normally just agree and give them back to her, however with it being the holiday, he is leaving to take the kids out of town that Wednesday when he picks them up as he has a birthday party planned with his family for the child out of town.

Who is right in this situation? Should he return the children on Wednesday and pick them up on Thursday even though the order says that he gets them the night before? Can he get into trouble for not returning them? The order also states that he has to let her know when he is taking the children out of town, he already did that when he initially told her his plans. Since he did that, if he picks them up and doesn't return them until Sunday will he be in contempt?

Thanks in advance.

Is it mom's turn to have the second half of the birthday? Did she say why she wanted the kids to come back?

She didn't say why and no, it's dad's turn to have them the 2nd half of the birthday.

Ok, the order maybe will need to be changed to say that the parent who exercises the Thanksgiving Holiday will ALSO have the child the second half of the day for the birthday (on Wednesday, the day before). This way, they can enjoy the birthday and the holiday.
Now.. are you saying that the other child's birthday is November 25 (Sunday)? And if so, then the order should be changed to say that the same parent exercising Thanksgiving Holiday would have the First Half of the day on Sunday/Birthday for the 2nd child.
I may be reading your OP wrong, not sure. What has happened in previous years? I suppose you can interpret the order to read a few different ways. I cannot advise you on if he would be helf in contempt but I would advise to have that order changed to be worded so that no one is confused.

The child's birthday is the day before Thanksgiving. He is to get the child from 2pm and return at 8pm on her birthday. The problem is that their order also states that he gets the child the day before Thanksgiving at 6pm as well as he gets them for that Friday as well. He interpreted that to mean that since he gets them at 6pm the day before thanksgiving (which is also the daughter's birthday) that he would be able to just keep her since his holiday time starts before the 'birthday time' ends. Also, this is his regularly scheduled weekend so he wanted to keep them until Sunday, which she has agreed to. The only issue they are having is with the actual birthday itself.

The divorce decree is fairly new and last year the birthday was not the same as Thanksgiving, nor did he have Thanksgiving.

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Quoting Neal1421

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The child's birthday is the day before Thanksgiving. He is to get the child from 2pm and return at 8pm on her birthday. The problem is that their order also states that he gets the child the day before Thanksgiving at 6pm as well as he gets them for that Friday as well. He interpreted that to mean that since he gets them at 6pm the day before thanksgiving (which is also the daughter's birthday) that he would be able to just keep her since his holiday time starts before the 'birthday time' ends. Also, this is his regularly scheduled weekend so he wanted to keep them until Sunday, which she has agreed to. The only issue they are having is with the actual birthday itself.

The divorce decree is fairly new and last year the birthday was not the same as Thanksgiving, nor did he have Thanksgiving.

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This is an issue that needs to be addressed on both a short term and a long term basis, as obviously this will happen again. Normally special days (ie birthdays) overcome regular visitation, and holidays overcome regular visitation and special days. My suggestion for a compromise for this year is that your friend negotiate with mom to give up his birthday time this year, and just pick the child up at 6:00 to go out of town.

I would also recommend that for the future, they celebrate birthdays on the saturday before or after the actual birthday, on their own weekend time...that honestly eliminates a TON of problems.