Husband Says I Am Lying About Domestic Violence
My question involves criminal law for the state of: Louisiana
Hello, my husband was arrested a month ago for felony domestic violence on me. He is a veteran with PTSD, is bipolar, was prescribed medication for depression but he won't take it, and he was going to anger management for a previous charge of DV. He is terrified of going to jail, and after he was arrested a month ago, he said that I was making everything up and he left and went back to his home state. I was distraught and I couldn't understand why he wouldn't just own up to his mistakes. In a moment of weakness, I emailed him to beg him to call me and get help for the sake of our daughter. All he did was coldly accuse me of lying. I didn't know what to do and I thought that if I defended myself that he would just block me and I would have no chance of getting him help. My question is, can he use my silence against me to say that I am lying? All I wanted was for him to get help.
Re: Husband Says I Am Lying About Domestic Violence
I can't read the exchange from here, but I'm not sure what you believe could be made of your silence in response to an accusation that you lied.
You think this is going to come up in what context?
Re: Husband Says I Am Lying About Domestic Violence
He doesn't need a criminal record. He needs a specialist trained in PTSD, bi-polar disorders etc... Not only may his perception of events be different, he may not even remember the events.
Re: Husband Says I Am Lying About Domestic Violence
He can try to do whatever he pleases, but your silence won't make a difference to the state/prosecutor or the outcome. Please don't make the mistake of thinking "silence means I agree with him" in this context.
Ultimately, you're protecting yourself and doing the right thing as a citizen at the same time. If he won't get help on his own, perhaps prosecution and jail will inspire him to do so. I'd feel free to reach out to people at the VA and veterans' groups to get in touch with him; perhaps he needs more contact from folks who are and have been there. He's still in denial, and that's part of the illness; it's not your fault (and not, as a practical matter, his "fault" as such but it is his responsibility to address it).
Re: Husband Says I Am Lying About Domestic Violence
Thank you both very much for the replies. I am worried because when I first contacted him, I didn't say anything about getting him help at first, I kept begging him and begging him to call me because I knew that if I mentioned his illness, just like if I defended myself, he wouldn't even try to listen to me. After he refused to call me, that's when I mentioned getting him help. I'm afraid that he's going to drag my daughter into it and try to say that I'm using his illness against him to try and get custody of my daughter or something.
Re: Husband Says I Am Lying About Domestic Violence
There is a medical treatment for PTSD called EMDR. It is done by specialized therapists. I don't know how the bi-polar might taint its effects.