Mother Refuses to Follow Court Order

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California.
I have had full custody of my son for over 7 years; recently (within the last 2 years) his bio-mom has "wanted" to get involved with his life. I have no problem with that, and agreed to her having supervised visits with our son every other weekend at her aunts house. (My son is now 12 yrs old). We have been thru the family court and have agreed that NEITHER OF US MAY TAKE MY SON OUT OF THE COUNTY WITHOUT NOTIFIYING THE OTHER PARENT. In the past two months she has violated the court order TWICE by taking my son over 4 hrs away without my knowledge on her weekend visits. I am wondering what my options are. I talked to someone and they said I have to file a "failure to follow court order" paper in court. I work full time, not to mention am a full time parent. I have little time for extra court apperances. Can I send her a certified letter stating my issue with her not following the court order, (and my concerns due to that...... if there is an emergency, I won't be looking on my caller ID for someone 4 hrs away, I expect my son to be in the agreed upon place)? Or, do I have to actually file with the court??
I am not looking for going to court. All I am looking for is if it is OK to send her a kind of "if this happens again..." letter would be acceptable. I really don't want to make this a huge "court" issue. I'd rather her bring my letter into mediation stating that I was over-stepping my boundaries as a father by pointing our she isn't following the court order, but without having to file any official paperwork. Kind of like a "warning" for her.
Thank you for your help in this issue

Generally, such restrictions apply only to relocation and not visitation.

What is it you wish to accomplish? If you do choose to take this back to court it's more than likely the clause will be removed completely unless you can prove that she's a flight risk.

(She's not - she's done it twice already and you still have your son)

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In the case of emergency, you would be notified either way - what difference would it make? You would know immediately where they were, same as if she told you about the journey beforehand.

My biggest issue (which is why I made it part of the court order with the mediator & judge) is that if I expect my son to be in the same town, with his bio-mom and her family. I won't be expecting any kind of emergency call from anywhere else. If I see an area code 4 hrs away, I might not pick up the phone, or think that it might be something important. Or, if I have an emergency here at home and need to get a hold of my son, I am going to call the home where he is suppose to be at, I would never think to try and call various relatives or friends of the bio-mom. THIS IS THE REASON SHE IS SUPPOSE TO CALL ME IF SHE IS GOING SOMEWHERE WITH MY SON. My ex doesn't have a car/drivers licence/house, which is why she is allowed supervised visitation(by her aunt @ the aunts house). I don't really want to make a huge deal about this, but I want to have something in writting stating that I was aware of her failure to follow the court order...............not to mention I am truely concerned about my Son if something happened. Is it proper for me to send her a letter reminding her of the court order? What excuse could she use for not giving me a call and just letting me know her family and my son are leaving the area?

Truly, dad, not leaving the county without notification is a bit overbearing.

You might remind mom of the reasons you'd like contact information, and keep things focused on your child while showing mom respect. But perhaps mom just wants a little freedom from you knowing about everything she's doing with kiddo. (I'm not saying you are or aren't doing things to make mom justified in feeling that way, just that that's what she might be thinking.) As long as kiddo is safe, I don't think a judge would fault her for that. So you can either try to make nice or just deal. A letter might make her more obstinate about the situation.

Why not simply remind her - politely?

Again, if you make an issue of this in court, you may well find that it backfires on you and the clause is removed completely.

The issue is that it doesn't matter if you can show you were aware of her failure to follow the order - what matters is if you make the COURT aware. Establishing a pattern of allowing the situation to continue without taking it to court COULD position mom to argue that you ARE ok with the situation and that the restrictions should be removed altogether. Yes, court appearances take time, but only the court has the ability to enforce or modify court orders, and if there's a problem with an order, court is really where it needs to be handled. The reality is that you can ultimately, at some time in the future, expect that unless mom is somehow shown to be a DANGER to the child, that she'll be granted regular visitation, at which point she can pretty much do anything and go anywhere (except out of the country). The longer you go on without enforcing the order through the court, the better argument mom has that the restrictions should be lifted, since a new status quo, more lenient than the order, will have been established.

Personally I'm not worried about her feeling "bad" because she needs to contact me if she takes my son out of the area. She is a... "less than desirable parent" who cannot even take care of herself and I am concerned for my son. I was concerned when her family did this a year ago, and a Judge saw it valuable enough to put into the court order. I am trying to be nice by just sending her a letter between the two of us instead of pulling her infront of a judge again to say she isn't following a court order. (as a side note...... 16 months ago a judge ordered her to get a job and pay $21/month in child support to show "good faith" in her son. To this date she has paid nothing, doesn't have a job ect. I haven't held this against my son, which is why she continues to get her supervised visits twice a month.
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I can't think of a reason it would ever be removed. There is no reason for her to remove my son from the area without my knowledge.

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How can the court enforce this?!? I don't want to take her visitations away, I just want her to know (she might actually be that stupid) of the court order. There is no issue with the order, there is an issue with her following the order. It's not to a legal status in my book yet, I was just wanting to send her (a certified) notice that she is in violation and the next infraction could result in court action. She is already not in good standing with the court......deadbeat MOM and all, and I really dont' want to make more problems for her. She already has refused to accept that she has had a court order for child support for over a year and hasn't paid anything.

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Quoting Humboldtkids1

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Personally I'm not worried about her feeling "bad" because she needs to contact me if she takes my son out of the area. She is a... "less than desirable parent" who cannot even take care of herself and I am concerned for my son. I was concerned when her family did this a year ago, and a Judge saw it valuable enough to put into the court order. I am trying to be nice by just sending her a letter between the two of us instead of pulling her infront of a judge again to say she isn't following a court order.

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A letter does nothing at all. And you really need to expect the clause to be modified and/or dropped entirely in the future. No matter how lousy a parent you think she is.

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(as a side note...... 16 months ago a judge ordered her to get a job and pay $21/month in child support to show "good faith" in her son. To this date she has paid nothing, doesn't have a job ect. I haven't held this against my son, which is why she continues to get her supervised visits twice a month.

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Child support isn't a ticket to see the child.

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I can't think of a reason it would ever be removed. There is no reason for her to remove my son from the area without my knowledge.

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The fact that he's also HER son is ample reason enough.

She absolutely will, in the future, be able to take your mutual child out of the county, out of the State and yes - even out of the country.

You best accept that now.

If I don't know where to find my son..............like he is 4 hrs from where he should be............how can he be notified if we have a family emergency??

Have you ever sought counseling to help you deal with the animosity towards Mom?

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Quoting Humboldtkids1

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If I don't know where to find my son..............like he is 4 hrs from where he should be............how can he be notified if we have a family emergency??

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"Hey, I'm taking Junior to see Jane Friend. She lives a couple hours away. Kthxbai".

Versus

Not telling you.

How exactly is the first going to change the nature of the family emergency?