Accused of Stalking for Going to Church Where My Spouse Takes Our Child

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Virginia

Last December my wife told me she needed "space to heal" from me. (I've never abused her either physically or verbally. There is a long history which I won't go into here.) We have an 11 year old son and we all still live under the same roof. There is no divorce decree, separation agreement, restraining order, or anything that legally prevents me from being in the presence of my son. I told me wife I'll give her space to heal for as long as she needs it. As soon as I agreed to her request for space she insisted that I stay away from our son which is something I never agreed to. Long story short 2 months ago she left the church where we met and were married and started attending the catholic parish. She also took my son there and had him secretly baptized Catholic without her (or the parish) telling me. I got permission from the parish priest to attend church with our son (which did NOT please my wife). Today I asked her when she's taking him to Mass and she wouldn't say. She periodically calls the local police depart to report me as "stalking" when I attempt to join my wife and my son in an activity. I've asked in the past for a schedule where we alternate spending time with our son and she refuses. It appears that today she did call the police about my request regarding Mass. I've told her in the past that if she goes alone I won't follow her there. Can I get in any trouble at all by denying my wife's request that I do not show up for Mass when she is there with me son? Thanks in advance.

Unless your wife seeks and is awarded a restraining order, she has no ability to prevent you from going to any public place, including church. It's not stalking to attend a function or service with your own child - stalking involves an element that would put a reasonable person in fear - and frankly, you really don't get that by attending church with your child and wife that you're still living with. That's why local PD hasn't taken any action against you, despite her numerous complaints. Honestly however, it may only be a matter of time before she's able to phrase things just right to convince police that there some credible threat was issued or otherwise exists. It that happens, you'll be out of the house and theoretically cut off from your child. Your wife is playing a game of chicken with you, with your child in the middle. Consider carefully whether you're "giving her space", or whether she's attempting to drive you and your child apart, for whatever reason. Her needing "space" is her needing space - it's NOT interfering with your time with your own child. Something else is going on here. If you allow this situation to continue, it's not likely to end favorably for you.

Time to start thinking about divorce and seeking primary custody, before you find yourself living elsewhere and only having visitation....or less. There's seriously something amiss when she's willing to live with you yet wants to keep the child from you.

Concur with aardvarc. There is something very, very wrong here, and if you want to continue to remain involved in your son's life, it seems to me that drastic measures are in order.

I really hate advising people to seek a divorce, but it is sometimes the last best option. It appears your marriage has reached the point of no return. I'm so sorry. You need to consult a local attorney and start setting about protecting yourself and your relationship with your son.

I agree, go for a divorce/custody or separation/custody order. I think mom wants to be hubby shopping, while you pay the bills.