How to Change My Son's Name Without the Mother's Consent
My question involves name change laws in the State of: Florida
A girl that I was only friends with got pregnant with my baby. Before the baby was due her family had decided that the baby was not going to have my last name. I protested this decision and our families had a sit down to discuss it. It came to an agreement that if I was still involved when the child turned two that he could have his name changed to me. I unhappily agree to this decision and signed the birth certificate in the hospital. During the first year the mother tried to limit and delegate my contact with my son, especially after I got married. Through this reason, when the child was 18 months, I filed a Petition to Establish Paternity for joint custody and also requested a name change for my child. After six months, the mother finally submitted her official Answer to Petition for Paternity, in which she agreed upon the name change and submitted a notarized copy to court. I had temporary custody of my son for seven months and then for another six months after there was a harsh custody battle, until we agreed upon joint custody in court.
That was a year ago. The child is now of age four. Since things have settled down (and no final judgement yet in the paternity case since we are doing it pro se) I brought up the name change. I asked if we could continue through the name change process and she said that she had forgotten about the name change and was undecided. I reminded her that the paper work had been started and she had agreed to it in her Answer for Paternity that was notarized and submitted to court. She then became hostile, aggressive, and unwilling to further the discussion.
She says she will not change our child's last name, without any reason even though I asked for one several times. She has also been engaged at least twice that I know of, intending on getting married and changing her last name. So then our child would not have either of his parents last names. She uses our child's last name to inform people that I am not in his life and a dead beat dad, which she has said to me several time, while I have joint custody. She simply doesn't want to change our son's name because it is something I have sincerely wanted.
I want to know if her actions along with the Answer she submitted, if this was legally binding and enough to get my son's name changed in court without her agreeing? I want to be fully knowledgeable before asking to have a hearing before the judge or magistrate.
Re: My Son's Name Change Without the Mother's Consent
If your name is on the BC I would have to presume you and the mother signed an acknowledgment of paternity. Unless somebody wishes to challenge that, I don't understand your suit to establish paternity. The AOP is a legal acknowledgment that the people listed are the parents.
So, why the paternity suit? The courts are obviously treating you as the legal father evidenced by the fact you were granted any rights in the custody/visitation action.
If you want to change the name, you will have to file a petition in the courts asking the court to agree. The mother will have her chance to agree, object, or merely comment on the issue. The court will determine if a name change is appropriate and what the name will be. If there is disagreement, it appears many courts seem to prefer a hyphenated version of the two parents names.
Re: My Son's Name Change Without the Mother's Consent
I was advised by an attorney to establish Paternity because we were never married. This is how they doing doing out of wedlock custody arrangements here in Florida. There had to be a court case established in order to continue pursuing joint custody. Unless there is court ordered custody arrangements, just because the Father is on the birth certificate, that doesn't mean he has joint custody or guaranteed time with the child. My son's mother tried to limit my time with my son or wouldn't show up or would show up a day early to pick him up because she felt like it. I was being taken advantage of because there was no joint custody arrangements.
My question was, is the evidence and documentation that I have good enough cause to convince the courts to change his name. Not how do I pursue a name change.
Re: My Son's Name Change Without the Mother's Consent
Quote:
I was advised by an attorney to establish Paternity because we were never married.
but you said paternity was already established. The AOP does that.
Quote:
just because the Father is on the birth certificate, that doesn't mean he has joint custody or guaranteed time with the child.
of course not and I never suggested anything of the sort. It doesn however establish paternity and your standing to sue for custody and visitation.
Quote:
My question was, is the evidence and documentation that I have good enough cause to convince the courts to change his name. Not how do I pursue a name change.
No. You have not given any real reason why the child's name should be changed other than you want the child to have your name. You can request on that principle. As I said, the judge will decide what the child's name will be in the end.
Re: My Son's Name Change Without the Mother's Consent
I have already filed Paternity three years ago. The name change thing never got fully resolved in the last 3 years. So the mother using the child's currently last name to make it appear as though I am an uninvolved father and telling people as well as myself that I am a dead beat dad and that I don't take care of my son (when he is with her) show spitefulness. As well as agreeing to in the the Answer to my petition does not demonstrate that she is not allowing my son to have my last name from birth as a means of hurting me?
Re: My Son's Name Change Without the Mother's Consent
Quote:
As well as agreeing to in the the Answer to my petition does not demonstrate that she is not allowing my son to have my last name from birth as a means of hurting me?
You're not seeming to understand that the child's last name is going to be decided by the courts based on the best interests of the child, not based on you being pissed at Mom.
How is it in the CHILD'S best interest to bear your name? THAT is what you have to convince the courts of.