Bed Bugs and Visitation

My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: FL

My ex and I share custody of our son. Earlier this week my son came to my house with nearly 100 bug bites all over his body.(Have pictures as evidence) I questioned his father about this and he admitted that he found 'bed bugs' in our son's bed at his home.

I have no evidence of infestation at my home and no one in family has sustained any bites. I would like to keep it this way.

My ex admitted last night on the phone that he has yet done anything to correct the problem at his home regarding the bed bugs. He states "They are not in my room so he can sleep in my bed". I have done research on-line and determined that once bed bugs are found in one area, the entire home needs to be treated as they live in walls and behind outlets etc.

My concerns are that my son will be bitten again when visiting his father and that my son may inadvertently bring these blood suckers to my home by way of backpack or clothing. (Another fact from my research online is that they are notorious hitchhikers).

I asked my ex last night that he not bring our son to his house until it has been cleaned and a pest control service completed. I don't feel this is unreasonable. However my ex laughed at me and called me 'mental'. I didn't tell my ex that he could not see his son, simply that it is in our son's best interest to not sleep there or be there while the home is infested. I suggested that he take our son to a baseball game, the park, beach, movies, golfing etc. I understand that it is father's day weekend. I only requested that he not go to his house and that he be brought back to my house for the overnight period.

My son is 11 and has told me that he doesn't want to go back to his dad's house for fear of being "eaten alive". I am not trying to cause problems or stop my ex from spending time with our son. I just don't want the bugs at my home or him to be bitten again.

My questions are:

When my ex comes to pick him up tomorrow, what say does my son have? He has already expressed a desire to stay with me until the bugs are gone.
Should I contact CPS, does knowingly having your child stay in a home with an infestation constitute neglect/abuse?
Are the police an appropriate avenue?
Can I get in trouble for "keeping my ex from his son" (He'll surely feel that this what I am trying to do)? He already yelled at me last night for "trying to keep him from his son" When the reality is that I am trying to keep our son safe. My son has already told me he doesn't want to go back there knowing the bugs are still there. (I can't blame him and won't force my son to go).

I will contact my attorney first thing Monday AM. She was in court today when I tried reaching her. :(


Any help is greatly appreciated.

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When my ex comes to pick him up tomorrow, what say does my son have? He has already expressed a desire to stay with me until the bugs are gone.

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Zero. The court says he goes, therefore he goes. A visitation order is an ORDER, not a suggestion.

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Should I contact CPS, does knowingly having your child stay in a home with an infestation constitute neglect/abuse?

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How much of a fight do you want to pick with your ex? Bedbugs happen. No, it's not abuse, but it could be seen as neglect if he lets it go on for too long.

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Are the police an appropriate avenue?

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Absolutely not. It's not a criminal offense to have been invaded by bedbugs any more than it is a criminal offense for your dog to turn up with fleas.

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Can I get in trouble for "keeping my ex from his son" (He'll surely feel that this what I am trying to do)? He already yelled at me last night for "trying to keep him from his son" When the reality is that I am trying to keep our son safe. My son has already told me he doesn't want to go back there knowing the bugs are still there. (I can't blame him and won't force my son to go).

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Daddles can drag you off to court for a contempt hearing if you don't adhere to the order. When the court says FROG, you'd best JUMP.

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Quoting LawResearcherMissy

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Zero. The court says he goes, therefore he goes. A visitation order is an ORDER, not a suggestion.


How much of a fight do you want to pick with your ex? Bedbugs happen. No, it's not abuse, but it could be seen as neglect if he lets it go on for too long.



Absolutely not. It's not a criminal offense to have been invaded by bedbugs any more than it is a criminal offense for your dog to turn up with fleas.

Daddles can drag you off to court for a contempt hearing if you don't adhere to the order. When the court says FROG, you'd best JUMP.

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"Ok, so my son has no choice but to sleep with bugs in his bed? He already has nearly 100 bites. Again, I am not suggesting he can't visit his son, simply that he not go to his house until it is no longer infested"
"How long is too long? Is is prudent to wait?"


Thanks for your reply.

Anyone else have any similar cases or suggestions.

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Ok, so my son has no choice but to sleep with bugs in his bed?

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Where do you see that? Funny, I don't recall writing that, and I'll be damned if I can see that up there. Can you show me, please?

Dad already said that kiddo can sleep in his room.

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Again, I am not suggesting he can't visit his son, simply that he not go to his house until it is no longer infested

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You can ASK, but if Dad refuses, then Dad refuses. You do not get to interfere with his parenting time at all. Unless being held in contempt of court appeals to you?

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How long is too long? Is is prudent to wait?

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If he hasn't had the house fumigated by his next visitation time, contact your attorney to see about your options. In no case, however, do you get to unilaterally decide how Dad's parenting time happens. That's the court's purview, not yours.

You need to be very careful about having your son introduce bedbugs into your home. Here are some tips.

In terms of dad's house, your two most obvious remedies are to try to get a court to take certain action (e.g., suspending overnights) until the bedbugs are eradicated, or seeing if protective services will investigate (I can't promise that this will be anything close to a priority, but it depends on the county).

One instance/infestation is not likely to change anything.

Repeated infestations when the parent isn't doing anything at all, is another matter entirely.

Thanks Mr. Knowitall for the link, it is most helpful! I have already printed these tips and shared with my husband. We will make every effort to keep these buggers at bay. I intend on contacting my attorney Monday and will pray for my son this weekend. I realize that CPS has more pressing issues to deal with, but clearly this has upset my son and therefore is important to me.

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Quoting LawResearcherMissy

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Where do you see that? Funny, I don't recall writing that, and I'll be damned if I can see that up there. Can you show me, please?

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Sorry! Didn't mean to put words in your mouth!

I'm just a worried mom. That's all.

And honest,I came here for advice and don't want to cross any lines legally that would place me in contempt of court, so I really appreciate your help.

You should have or should take your child to the doctor right away. Untreated bed bugs CAN and has been be cause for neglect. Definitely call CPS for advice on what you can or should do.