Termination of Rights

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Oklahoma

A Little background: Won custody August 2007
I have been with my husband for nearly 5 years now. Two weeks after dating, he gained custody of his two sons and his step-son came to live with him. I was a major person in the picture helping him every step of the way. However - I had my own apartment and never stayed over. Nor did I want to meet the children under those circumstances. Bio Mom left (Ran from legal issues) for nearly a year. She then showed up and picked up the step-son from school prior to me arriving to pick the older boy and step-son up. Needless to say, that was heartbreaking in itself and nothing we could do to get him back.
At the time that he gained custody, the boys were 2 and 4. The youngest didn't even know who his mother was. I remember putting him to bed a month after he moved in with his father and going in to try to calm him down. He had his arms reaching up to me calling Mommy. I had absolutely no idea who he was talking to. Asking for her or for me. Broke my heart.
Fast forward a bit - Bio mom went to jail. She got sober while in and began to have a good relationship with the boys on the phone. During this time I was pregnant with my first child (and married... Moved in AFTER getting married. It's what was right for us). Even talking to their mother, the youngest would ask about when I had him in my tummy (this was in 2009). Always told him that it wasn't my tummy that grew him but that I loved him like he was my own but that he has two moms.
Bio gets out of jail April 2010. At this point she had been gone for nearly 3 years. She began to have a relationship with her children. I would even personally pick her up and bring her to sports games that the boys were playing in. This continued until the end of May/June when she began to have a sexual relationship with my husband's father. At that point, we decided that we would utilize the supervised visitation that was court ordered.
Dec/Jan 2010/11 - She got pregnant by a man and lost the babies. (told me it was one man but told another that it was his)
April/May 2011 - Began using drugs once again and moved in with another man
May 2011 - Went to jail in Nevada
July 2011 - Arrived back in Oklahoma and within 2 weeks was pregnant by yet another man (another section of the story)

March 2012 - gave birth to a drug addicted baby. Xanax, Meth, Adderal, and Hydrocodone.

MIND YOU SHE IS MARRIED TO A MAN IN TEXAS AND NOT DIVORCED
DHS stepped in and is now terminating parental rights. We have a relationship with the father of the baby. We want all the children to have a relationship with eachother. They are brothers and deserve to know each other.

Currently my 7 year old is losing weight and just not eating. AT what point do we say enough is enough. She is still using and refusing to go into treatment. DHS has requested, Probation officer has requested, and we have asked her. I can not promote something that is hurting my children. WE want for her to get better but if she refuses to help herself it doesn't matter.
Do we have legal right to request to terminate parental rights?> :confused::confused::confused::confused:

Your husband could request it. This would NEED an attorney.

If DHS is recommending TPR, I'm not sure why OP's husband would have to be involved at all outside of putting himself forward as the obvious place for custody.

Which is it? DHS recommending TPR or not?

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Quoting Mom2FourBoys

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Do we have legal right to request to terminate parental rights?

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You mean, if you and your spouse petition for stepparent adoption?

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Quoting Dogmatique

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If DHS is recommending TPR, I'm not sure why OP's husband would have to be involved at all outside of putting himself forward as the obvious place for custody.

Which is it? DHS recommending TPR or not?

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I think DHS is recommending termination of mom's rights to the newborn that was born on drugs.

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Quoting drthyrd

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I think DHS is recommending termination of mom's rights to the newborn that was born on drugs.

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You're likely right. I missed it. Oops!

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Quoting Dogmatique

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You're likely right. I missed it. Oops!

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I rambled a bit in the post. I would definitely adopt them. If anything happended to my husband, No way in this world would I want them going to her. Nor do I want them going to my MIL or FIL. Not that they wouldn't be good to them. I have just raised them for far to long as my own and I don't want my boys and my step-sons separated. We have raised them as brothers. They don't even know the term half-brother.

And yes - DHS stepped in on the newborn who was her ex-boyfriends child. He is fighting for the baby and after her no-show twice for court and jumping through all the hoops that DHS is putting him through (Even though he called dhs prior to baby being born and they couldn't do anything and he attempted to stop her from using just to physically get attacked - and forcing her to move out) he hopefully will be starting to get overnight visits in July.

We have an attorney - but she always tells us that it's just not something she would do. I don't know if it's not something she goes for or what?? I mean the Bio-mother NEVER shows up to court.

Ask your attorney WHY (or rather, Dad's attorney - as painful as it is to hear, you're a legal stranger and this isn't your legal matter).

Then get back to us, if you can? It might help us help you further.