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Issues of Consent
My question involves guardianship in the State of: Illinois
I have recently (within the last two months) become involved with a girl (S). I found out that her mother was awarded legal guardianship over her because S has exhibited suicidal behavior in the past and has been in and out of group homes and nursing homes all her life. We have not had sexual intercourse but we have exchanged online messages of a sexual nature and we have been seen hugging and kissing, holding hands, etc. We are both in our early twenties.
Her mom recently discovered the messages we've been sending back and forth and has threatened to go to the police and get a restraining order against me, or worse. So far as I can see, S has battled depression and suicidal thoughts but I don't think that makes her mentally incompetent in matters of consent. What I'm wondering is, should I be expecting a police officer knocking on my door any time soon?
I don't know if this matters, but S has had sexual intercourse with men before and her mom was fully aware, even encouraged those relationships.
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Re: Issues of Consent
YMMV. If she has guardianship, she calls the shots.
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Re: Issues of Consent
Not criminal. As long as sex is consensual and the parties are 18 or over, even if one is mentally impaired (which just being depressed or even suicidal wouldn't really qualify), isn't criminal.
Exchanging sexual emails isn't criminal either.
A restraining order is possible, but even that would seem more of a threat at this point than anything else.
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Re: Issues of Consent
I have included a link to the IL Guardianship Guide. The guardian can elect to take action against you, if she feels it is in her wards best interests.
http://gac.state.il.us/pdfs/PRAGUIDE2007.pdf
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Re: Issues of Consent
Thank you for your speedy reply. I figured as much, but with the issue of legal guardianship clouding the matter I was starting to freak out a bit. Your response sets my mind at ease.
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Re: Issues of Consent
The general test for competence is whether the alleged victim "is unable to understand the nature of the act or is unable to give knowing consent". See, e.g., ILCS 720 ILCS 5/11-1.20 (Criminal Sexual Assault); 20 ILCS 5/12-15 (Criminal Sexual Abuse). I'm not going to attempt to guess at the woman's capacity. It is conceivable that mom would be able to get a restraining order even if the woman is competent, depending on the full facts and history.
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Re: Issues of Consent
OP, I had a friend in a similar situation to this girl. Regardless of how her mom loved her, she was not proactive enough to protect her. She fell in love with a guy and spent every free moment she had with him. One day he beat her so badly, she suffered severe brain damage and died. You appear to be trying to take advantage of this girl. Remember God is watching.