Pregnancy and Emancipation

My question involves emancipation laws for the State of: Florida

I am not a minor, I am a friend of one who has questions but can't look things up from home. Here goes...

She is 16 and pregnant. Her mother (M) is a very overbearing, controlling person. She refuses to let daughter (D) go to school. She has been begging mom for the three years I have known her to let her go to school. The mom makes her take online classes. I have asked D to babysit for me before and M always comes up with a reason not to let her come over... M has had the kids taken away from her by the state before and somehow got them back... There are three children in the house, the 16 yr old, an emotionally abused 11 yr old (who is the size of his 7 yr old sister) and a 7 yr old who thinks she is 2. In my opinion (I know it's just an opinion, but I am a scout leader, I teach children's sunday school and I used to have in home daycare), the parents are unfit. Dad refuses to acknowledge the 11 yr old boy (who needs dad's attention desparately) but will only yell at him for standing up after the mom has made him sit still for hours (I have seen this). They encourage the 7 yr old to act like a baby, and I dont mean spoiling her, they tell her she is scared to sleep by herself so she will think she is and she sleeps in their bed every night. They put her in a car seat, not a booster (this is actually unsafe as she is too big and belongs in a booster). Anyway... Just a little background on the family life...

Back to the pregnant 16 yr old. She does not have a job becasue M will not let her out of her sight. She gets up with the younger ones everyday and gets them to school, she walks to the busstop to get them after school and helps with homework. The parents tell her that once she has the baby, she (the baby) will sleep with them and they are going to keep the father's family away from the baby (They are good people). D is scared that M will take custody of her baby somehow. That is actually how she got custody of D... Too long of a story...

D's boyfriend is working part time and going to school (he is also 16). His mother has offered to take D in and help with support until they graduate and get on their feet.

I guess the main question at hand is this... How can the teens go out and get jobs to support themselves and get their life together if the parents won't let them out of their sight? D has gone over to her boyfriend's house for the night to get away from the fighting and M had the police bring her home. It is kind of a catch 22 for the teens who have a legitimate reason for desiring emancipation.

She has called and reported abuse but nothing has happened... The younger kids are too scared to talk and most people just see a pissed off teenage girl who is hormomal and mad because momma made her do a chore or put her on restriction. This is a legitimate situation. What can her first step be toward getting out from under M's thumb long enough to get a job?

Please don't give me any sarcasm, I am asking this for a friend who I am genuinely concerned about but I can't get too openly involved for reasons I choose not to reveal. I just worry about the safety of this girl and her baby...

The courts aren't going to emancipate a pregnant teen couple so they can go and play house.

Sorry - but it's not happening.

There are two ways, and only two ways, for a minor in Ohio to become emancipated. The first is through lawful marriage; the second is through enrollment in the active armed forces. For both a 16 year old needs parental permission, and in some parts of Ohio for the first a 16 year old also needs permission from the court.

If the authorities do not see the "abuse" as being severe enough for them to take action, then your friend sits right where she is until she turns 18 - and not one minute earlier.

This is not sarcasm. This is legal fact.

I know that they can't support themselves... They have no idea how hard this is going to be. Maybe a different way to ask is what does the 16 yr old need to do in order to move in with the boyfriend's mom? I know it's a longshot and I have never been in any situation of this kind but I just wanted to know some real answers or at least what to tell her to do first. If it was up to me, all three kids would be yanked from the home but it's not so I just try to help the only one in the home with sound mind (funny that it's the pregnant teen...). I think she should have done more research on emancipation before getting pregnant (I am convinced she did this just to gain emancipation). Thanks for any help or direction...

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Quoting cbg

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There are two ways, and only two ways, for a minor in Ohio to become emancipated. The first is through lawful marriage; the second is through enrollment in the active armed forces. For both a 16 year old needs parental permission, and in some parts of Ohio for the first a 16 year old also needs permission from the court.

If the authorities do not see the "abuse" as being severe enough for them to take action, then your friend sits right where she is until she turns 18 - and not one minute earlier.

This is not sarcasm. This is legal fact.

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That's what I was afraid of... I just needed confirmation. On the other hand, does HER mom have legal rights to the baby? M can't just take D's baby, can she? She seems to be obsessed with all babies to the point that it creeps me out to see her hold my 2 yr old niece...

Ironically, getting pregnant has scuppered pretty much any chance she would have ever had of being emancipated. Her plan backfired majorly.

Grandma can't take her daughter's child.

She has no rights to the child whatsoever.

Yea, her plan isn't working out so good for her. I actually didn't realize that being pregnant made it harder to become emancipated. Under normal circumstances, I would laugh at a teenager for this, but she is the one getting on to her mother for not making the 7 yr old eat dinner and letting her eat candy but making the 11 yr old sit at the dining room table all night. It is really sad the blatant favortism shown for the girl and the disgust shown to the boy (he is really a sweet kid). The mom is one of MY mom's friends AND I teach one of the younger children in sunday school so I really don't want to get too involved. I will definately tell D what you all have told me so she can just bide her time and focus on getting a job and taking care of her baby and learning to be a real adult for the next year...

Thank you!!

That's how the courts see it, yes - being a young pregnant teen tells the court that you need more and not less adult supervision.

She's going to need all the help she can get.

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Quoting queentraci

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She is 16 and pregnant.

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Her chances of emancipation ended the moment she got pregnant. Everything after that is irrelevent in regards to potential emancipation.

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She refuses to let daughter (D) go to school.

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Then the school board should have notified the sheriff's office about a truancy issue.

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She has been begging mom for the three years I have known her to let her go to school. The mom makes her take online classes.

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Ok. So she is getting a school education. If mom wants that to happen from home, mom has the power to enforce that.

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I have asked D to babysit for me before and M always comes up with a reason not to let her come over...

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Again, mom's right as a parent.

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M has had the kids taken away from her by the state before and somehow got them back...

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If she got them back, then she was able to comply with whatever the state wanted her to do.

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There are three children in the house, the 16 yr old, an emotionally abused 11 yr old (who is the size of his 7 yr old sister) and a 7 yr old who thinks she is 2. In my opinion (I know it's just an opinion, but I am a scout leader, I teach children's sunday school and I used to have in home daycare), the parents are unfit.

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The only opinion that MATTERS is that of a COURT who finds the parents unfit - usually as part of an investigation conducted by CPS and taken before the judge. If you've got concerns for the children's welfare, CPS is the correct contact to be made.

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Dad refuses to acknowledge the 11 yr old boy (who needs dad's attention desparately) but will only yell at him for standing up after the mom has made him sit still for hours (I have seen this). They encourage the 7 yr old to act like a baby, and I dont mean spoiling her, they tell her she is scared to sleep by herself so she will think she is and she sleeps in their bed every night. They put her in a car seat, not a booster (this is actually unsafe as she is too big and belongs in a booster). Anyway... Just a little background on the family life...

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Lots of people are piss poor parents. Unfortunately they have the freedom to do so, so long as those actions don't constitute neglect or physical abuse.

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Back to the pregnant 16 yr old. She does not have a job becasue M will not let her out of her sight.

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She got out long enough to get pregnant. She's not going to win ANY points in this area. A 16 year old has no business being pregnant and the courts and social services will let mom do just about anything short of chaining her to the floor.

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She gets up with the younger ones everyday and gets them to school, she walks to the busstop to get them after school and helps with homework.

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No issue there - in the course of human history it's perfectly normal for older siblings to help care for younger ones.

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The parents tell her that once she has the baby, she (the baby) will sleep with them and they are going to keep the
father's family away from the baby (They are good people).

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Which they can absolutely do. If the father wants to visit the baby, he can go to court and get established as the father and seek visitation. He needs to know that visitation would ONLY be with the baby, if that's what the parents of the MINOR mother want. They remain her legal guardians with all power to control who is around their daughter. If the father gets visitation, the father's family can visit during the father's time.

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D is scared that M will take custody of her baby somehow.

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Sure could happen. Happens all the time. She can't just TAKE it though, M would have to go to court to seek and be awarded custody by a judge.

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D's boyfriend is working part time and going to school (he is also 16). His mother has offered to take D in and help with support until they graduate and get on their feet.

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If D's mother agrees, it's all good. If she doesn't D isn't going anywhere.

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I guess the main question at hand is this... How can the teens go out and get jobs to support themselves and get their life together if the parents won't let them out of their sight?

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They can't. And if they can't support themselves, they have no business making babies they can't support either.

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D has gone over to her boyfriend's house for the night to get away from the fighting and M had the police bring her home.

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Yes, and it this keeps happening, the boyfriend and her parents can expect mom to ask police to arrest them for contributing to the delinquency of a minor and harboring a runaway. The law is VERY clear here. Until D is 18, she is under the absolute rule of her parents. Period. End of story. Even if. And anyone who aids D in resisting or usurping that parental authority can be criminally charged. Mom's got the law on her side 100%.

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It is kind of a catch 22 for the teens who have a legitimate reason for desiring emancipation.

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All teens desire emancipation. A 16 year old who gets pregnant is proof to the courts that they are not anywhere NEAR the realm of responsibility need to be emancipated - no matter how miserable they are at home.

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She has called and reported abuse but nothing has happened...

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Then she needs to keep calling. But her actions of getting pregnant and being a habitual runaway to her boyfriend's only work to make HER look like the problem. She also needs to be aware of what AUTHORITIES consider to be abuse - which is things like physical striking, neglect in the form of no food, running water, or several changes of weather appropriate clothing, etc. It really is a pretty high standard - and the standards for parenting are frightengly low. Whereas most teens think that yelling, arguing, having rigid rules and restrictions, and lots of other thing constitute "abuse", but they don't.

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The younger kids are too scared to talk and most people just see a pissed off teenage girl who is hormomal and mad because momma made her do a chore or put her on restriction. This is a legitimate situation. What can her first step be toward getting out from under M's thumb long enough to get a job?

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The only ways this is going to happen are:

1) mom allows her to get a job (and most employers aren't going to want to hire a pregnant 16 year old - because just like the courts don't find them to be mature and responsible, most employers won't either...and whether they say it or not, they don't want to hire and train someone who they know is going to be missing work for doc appts, delivery, after care, etc.)

2) she gets removed by child services, and gets under THEIR thumb - but the GOAL of child services is to REUNITE children with their parents, so even this isn't likely to result in her being gone long enough to able to get a job

3) some other competent and responsible adult petitions the court to become her legal guardian - and will have to prove to the court's satisfaction that such a change is in the minor's best interest - (and no, the court won't entertain a motion from a person in any way, shape, or form, related to the person who got her pregnant)

Just out of curiousity, has the 16 year old figured out how many hours she'll need to work in order to pay for this child? Food? Diapers? Clothing? Medicines? Doctor visits? Babysitting while she's at work? How many hours is the father working? She WILL be going after him for child support, right? And she does realize that her parents have NO financial or other obligations to care for this child, right? (And if she's dependent on them to help provide for the child, and the father isn't able to provide, then this will open the door for M to seek custody on the grounds that M can't adequately provide for the child.) It's not really a catch 22 - it's a simple math problem that D is going to have a baby that she has no way to support.

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I just worry about the safety of this girl and her baby...

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Then CPS and continued reporting are really the ONLY option here (being aware of what CPS will view as abuse, and so far nothing in your posts points at anything that CPS would take action on).

what does the 16 yr old need to do in order to move in with the boyfriend's mom?

Outside of waiting for age 18, as indicated above, the ONLY way this is going to happen is if the boyfriend's mom stepped forward and petitioned for guardianship. If she does so, she has, I would estimate, less than one percent chance of success. The courts are not stupid. This kid has already gotten pregnant once. They're not likely to create a set of circumstances where it's likely to happen again.

I think you and your friend need to get your heads around the fact that bad parenting is not illegal; the kid herself is not showing signs of having terrific judgment; and she's going to be in the situation where she is for another two years so she'd better start making the best of it.

Again, no sarcasm here. Sometimes the answer is No.

aardvark, I am not all the way stupid... I am raising a 15 yr old boy and my 21 yr old daughter just got married. I did state that I have never gone through this so I wanted to give as much info as possible. I did also state that I was giving my OPINION... I am not on here ranting, I am asking for information. That is why I asked for no sarcasm, I was unclear on all of the aspects of this issue and I have had a couple of people give me straight forward answers without attempting to make me look like an uneducated person who has no idea of what is legal when it comes to parenting. My children have turned out pretty good so far and I do believe that says enough being as actions speak louder than words... Thanks so much!

cbg... Thank you for the short, straight forward answer. Just checking all angles so I can let D know. I am aware that her judgment has not been so good, but she is a kid, after all. I just promised her I would get info for her. I would not like to see her on her own yet, living with the boyfriend's mom, sure, but no way can she do it on her own. This thread is more of an assurance for her to know that so she can put this out of her mind and concentrate on her classes and staying healthy so she can have a healthy baby. I promise I am not all the way stupid... Thank you for the help, now I can print all of this and show her... God bless! :)