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What Can I Do With My Ex's Property After Breaking Up

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  • 06-04-2010, 10:11 PM
    Lentz
    What Can I Do With My Ex's Property After Breaking Up
    My question involves personal property located in the State of: North Carolina

    My Ex and I split up recently and she has left. All of her property remains in my home. At this time I can not confirm her whereabouts but I suspect a certain family member. Things went from curt but amicable to outright nasty when I confronted her about having physical relations with another man in my bedroom as well as running up bills that are in my name. I have three questions:

    1. I allowed her almost 8 weeks in the property to to pack her stuff and be ready to move. I was travelling most of that time. Upon arrival home I found that she has made little if any effort to pack and now she has left. what are her rights to the property? Please note that She did not contribute to the expenses. Much of the property she purchased using my money or was gifted to "us." Who owns it and what are my legal obligations to her?

    2. She had a phone on my cellular account. In the time she was supposed to be packing she has run up a total of over $1000.00 in charges over and above the standard bill on my account (typical bill is +/-$100.) We had a verbal agreement that she would pay half of the bill until such a time when I the dust settled. Is it possible to withold the property as leverage to make her pay (Keep in mind that I paid for a majority of what she considers "hers") Note: I shut off her phone when I found out about the overages.

    3. We have a dog. She agreed that I would keep the dog. she now states that she wants her. What determines ownership of pets?

    I am sorry this is a bit wordy, I am trying to address thuestions I would anticipate being asked (but I am by no means a Lawyer.)
  • 06-05-2010, 12:02 AM
    jk
    Re: Ex's Property
    Quote:

    All of her property remains in my home.
    define; your home. Is this a house you own or a rental of some sort

    If a rental, she is not on the lease, correct?

    If a house, she is not on the title, correct?

    Quote:

    My Ex and I split up recently and she has left.
    ex? girlfriend, wife, what?

    how long did she live with you?

    Quote:

    Is it possible to withold the property as leverage to make her pay
    no

    Quote:

    3. We have a dog. She agreed that I would keep the dog. she now states that she wants her. What determines ownership of pets?
    how was the dog acquired? Joint purchase; you bought as gift to her; she bought it for her; you bought it for you; she bought it for you
  • 06-05-2010, 12:39 AM
    Lentz
    Re: Ex's Property
    JK Thank you for your response. In answer to your questions:
    -----------------------------
    The property is a single family detached house. My name is the only one on the title. I purchased the property five years ago. My Ex Girlfriend did not contribute to the downpayment or the mortgage. She also did not contribute any significant amount to utilities. I requested a minimal rent be contributed about a year ago and she refused.
    ------------------------------
    She is my Ex Girlfriend, Never engaged or married. We lived together for 10+ years the last eight were in North Carolina. The relationship fluctuated multiple times between being significant others and roomates.
    ------------------------------
    When I say withold, I am not speaking of her property. I am speaking of property acquired using my money, much of which I personally made the purchase of. Other items we were together or she purchased using my money. I am not trying to keep her clother, jewelry etc. I am speaking of things such as the refrigerator which was a gift to both of us and lamps, tables, etc which I bought but she wants. I believe I should be able to keep the property but if I offer it in exchange for her payment does that constitute extortion or anything like that? Does that make a difference?
    ------------------------------
    The dog was a joint purchase using both hers and my Christmas gift money.
    ------------------------------
    One final question: is there a standard procedure for dividing common properety which I would be required to follow?


    Thank you for your help
  • 06-05-2010, 01:15 AM
    jk
    Re: Ex's Property
    Quote:

    The property is a single family detached house. My name is the only one on the title. I purchased the property five years ago. My Ex Girlfriend did not contribute to the downpayment or the mortgage. She also did not contribute any significant amount to utilities. I requested a minimal rent be contributed about a year ago and she refused.
    so, she was a tenant,

    Quote:

    When I say withold, I am not speaking of her property. I am speaking of property acquired using my money, much of which I personally made the purchase of.
    then why would you have to withhold it. If it is your property, you can do whatever you want with it.


    Quote:

    Other items we were together or she purchased using my money. I am not trying to keep her clother, jewelry etc. I am speaking of things such as the refrigerator which was a gift to both of us and lamps, tables, etc which I bought but she wants. I believe I should be able to keep the property but if I offer it in exchange for her payment does that constitute extortion or anything like that? Does that make a difference?
    If you claim it to actually be your property, all you are doing is negotiating. Not illegal.

    Quote:

    The dog was a joint purchase using both hers and my Christmas gift money.
    now that is going to be a problem. It would seem you both have equal rights to the dog so either the two of you work it out or end up in court where a judge (which hates trying to severe joint property such as this) will flip a coin. Guaranteed somebody isn't going to be happy.

    Quote:

    One final question: is there a standard procedure for dividing common properety which I would be required to follow?
    Ya, don't shoot each other.

    You simply negotiate. Again, a judge would hate to try to divide property. Almost guaranteed neither will be happy with the outcome.



    btw: since she was a tenant, you have to deal with her property as a LL would with a tenant. I don't know the specifics for your state and it's the wee hours of the morning and cruising through laws is not high on my list of things to do right at the moment but:

    many states require a written notice to be sent to the tenant informing they have some period of time (30 days is common) to remove their property or it will be disposed of. Don't screw it up or it could end up causing you to replace anything you toss out.
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