Child's Father Divorced Again, and He Leaves the Child With Others During Visitation

[neveah615]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: tennessee
my daughters dad is seperated from his wife. during dads recent visitations hes sending child to stay w/stepmom, or stepmoms sister, and on one instance he took my daughter to stay at a hotel. we have joint custody and he gets her every other w/end and every other wed. night. hes not even keeping her himself, hes sending her to stay with estranged wife or whoever during HIS visits.
what can i do about this legally?

[ealexdixon]

As long as the child isn't in danger, I'm not sure there's anything you can do.

[NdK1009]

Does your custody decree say anything about informing you of your daughter's whereabouts if she is going to be away from dad longer than a set period? For example, if my kids travel anywhere for more than 24 hours, or my ex is away from the kids for more than 48 hours, I have to be notified and I then have the option of regaining my kids. Perhaps you have similar language in your arrangement and you might be able to exercise the same. Essentially, he is leaving your daughter with a legal stranger. There should be something that you can do.

[mrshiggins]

You can go back to court and ask for an ROFR... right of first refusal. It says in laymens terms: if parent is going to be away from child for x amount of time (4-8 hours is a good set amount), then parent must call other parent and ask if they would like the child with them during that time.
This is usually granted when both parents are flexible with their schedule to pick child up on a whim and when the parents live somewhat close to each other (I personally would think less than 1 hour away).
If those aren't available, there is nothing you can do per se. You can always ask for a modification and state that while the child is in "his" care he dumps her off with others. They MAY (not guarenteed) reduce his time... they may not; depending on how much this upsets the child.

[neveah615]

well, i contacted an attorney after his last visitation and he picked up my daughter and immediately dropped her off @ his estranged wifes house and he spent the night at his mothers....basically there is nothing i can do as long as my daughter is "safe". the advice given to me was to document, document, document. i have been.
he brings my daughter home @ 9:30 pm on sunday nights b/c there is not a set time in our papers. i feel like he gets away with way too much b/c of the "lack of wording" in our papers. i want all of this nonsense crap to be dealt with. i have always been flexible & its come back to bite me.

[mrshiggins]

I forget the name of the papers, but you can file papers stating discrepencies in the court papers. This is where you can ask for a specific time. There while in mediation you can complain of his lacking of quality time. Go speak with the facilitators office or free legal help. Mediation is mandatory in CA.