Child Support

**dalejr8** · 04-25-2006, 02:11 AM

My ex is recently going to be served with Child Support arrears papers. He has been paying, however not the amount he has supposed to pay that was in our divorce agreement. It has been 3 years and I never said a word. He gives what he feels like giving. I am nervous what he will do when he gets the papers. What happens in court when we go? Everyone tells me that he will be made to pay the arrears, no questions. I think he is going to try to make me out to be a bad mom, and try to bring up things from our marriage. I understand that all is done and has nothing to do with our child. Please help!!! what happens next?

**aaron** · 04-25-2006, 03:33 AM

Unless custody or parenting time are raised as issues (whether by you or by him) the court won't have much interest in hearing his complaints. That is, if the sole issue before the court is the determination of the amount of his child support arrearage, he can rant and rave all he wants but the court will normally ignore him and assess the arrearage. (For that matter, the court is not likely to let him rant and rave all he wants on issues peripheral or irrelevant to the court's determination.)

**dalejr8** · 04-28-2006, 07:04 AM

Ok, what exactly do you mean with Parenting time. He always says that my boyfriend and me spend too much time with my daughter and I don't spend enough "alone" time with her. Which I do, but I don't feel the need to tell him everytime I do.

**aaron** · 04-28-2006, 07:31 AM

Parenting time is another term for visitation.

**dalejr8** · 04-28-2006, 09:47 AM

What would deem a parent to be unfit. I provide my daughter with a house, bedrooms set, food, clothing, heat, water, good hygiene, and extra curricular activites and not to mention lots of love! How could he try to take her away from me. I don't see how he possibly can. She gets everything. I do my best with what funds that I have. She is a happy child. My boyfriend is awesome with her. She absolutely loves him, and vice versa. My ex claims that he can control when my boyfriend sees her or is around her. Is this true? If he is not endangering her life in any way, how can he control that?

**bookwormmom** · 04-29-2006, 09:24 AM

okay I assume you were given custody of the child, and he was ordered to pay support. He can't bring up old stuff from the marriage and have it affect anything as far as what he owes. If you were granted custody, no I don't believe he can do anything to control who you spend time with. You weren't given custody on the assumption you would never again have a boyfriend or your daughter would never know another 'daddy-type' person.

I think you can relax. He is just trying to get to you. However, if he is the sort to threaten you this way, he is the sort to resist paying 'full freight' when ordered to. Don't be surprised if he finds ways to avoid paying... disappearing, 'losing' his job and working under the table... whatever. It is to your advantage he is being taken to court... he needs to understand that he pays.. or there is jail, or losing Driver's License.. many bad things can happen to him.

It will all be okay, really, he can't force you to do a single thing.

book

**dalejr8** · 05-02-2006, 03:02 PM

ok, papers have been served and now the issue is he wants to bring me up on forgery charges because when we were married I signed his name to an application for a "credit card" that was used for specific purpses only , it is not a Mastercard or Visa, not a regular credit card. He says that if charges are brought against me, I will lose my child and go to jail. All I want is what is owed to my child as governed by our state. We have joint, physical, shared custody. In other words, split right down middle. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. He wants me to drop the papers and we can "settle" and he will pay from this day on, but not the arrears.

**expertlaw** · 05-02-2006, 04:41 PM

Have you considered hiring a divorce lawyer?

How long has he known about the card, that you signed his name to the application, and how you were using it?

**dalejr8** · 05-03-2006, 01:22 AM

I do have a divorce lawyer, and my ex has known about the card for about 4 years now. I took it over in the divorce, because it was my bill. It was paid last summer in full. It is a dental card that is used to pay for dental expenses not covered by insurance. Just an easier way to pay for dental.