Child Support and Jail

[Ozark]

My question involves child support in the State of: ALABAMA

Here's some facts, in bullet form:
- July 31, 2008: Left job of 31K per year because job was taking too much of a toll on family and marriage; left to start a graphic design / marketing business
- December 28, 2008: Filed Petition to Modify Child Support, using an Affidavit of Substantial Hardship, to have child support reduced. My income dropped from $2650 per month to approximately $1,400 per month
- May 27, 2009: FINALLY went to court. After a month to hear back from judge, find out court INCREASED child support from $616 to $643, AND to pay an extra $75 per month to pay on arrears to purge myself of contempt (a total of $718 per month). If we couldn't pay the original $616, how could we pay the increase?
- September 24, 2009: Still not being able to pay (bear in mind I've been paying ex-wife average of $200 - $250 per month) the full amount, ex-wife is filing contempt to have me put in jail.

I currently have two children by a subsequent marriage (18 months and 3 months old). There is simply no way I can pay ex-wife the full amount of child support and continue to live. I've just landed a part time job at Winn-Dixie as a stocker, so that should help with the other income; but it's still not enough.

My arrears total about $5,200 right now. I have an attorney, but he's not that experienced in this area it seems, but I'm stuck with him, as I can't afford another (I'm bartering web design services in exchange for his representation).

Ex-wife claims she's going to have been thrown in jail so I can be put on work release so all of the money will go to her.

She left me for another guy (a soldier) 5 years ago, and now he's progressed in rank and has been deployed - and I know they are not struggling financially like we are.

Think about it - rent is $732, $250 groceries, $100 gas, $200 electric = this equals $1282. Where is the child support money supposed to come from? Of course, there are several other expenses we have - but we prioritize what we need to live on - then pay child support - then pay other expenses.

Any advice on this situation is greatly appreciated.

[Antigone]

My question involves child support in the State of: ALABAMA

Here's some facts, in bullet form:
- July 31, 2008: Left job of 31K per year because job was taking too much of a toll on family and marriage; left to start a graphic design / marketing business
- December 28, 2008: Filed Petition to Modify Child Support, using an Affidavit of Substantial Hardship, to have child support reduced. My income dropped from $2650 per month to approximately $1,400 per month
- May 27, 2009: FINALLY went to court. After a month to hear back from judge, find out court INCREASED child support from $616 to $643, AND to pay an extra $75 per month to pay on arrears to purge myself of contempt (a total of $718 per month). If we couldn't pay the original $616, how could we pay the increase?
- September 24, 2009: Still not being able to pay (bear in mind I've been paying ex-wife average of $200 - $250 per month) the full amount, ex-wife is filing contempt to have me put in jail.

I currently have two children by a subsequent marriage (18 months and 3 months old). There is simply no way I can pay ex-wife the full amount of child support and continue to live. I've just landed a part time job at Winn-Dixie as a stocker, so that should help with the other income; but it's still not enough.

My arrears total about $5,200 right now. I have an attorney, but he's not that experienced in this area it seems, but I'm stuck with him, as I can't afford another (I'm bartering web design services in exchange for his representation).

Ex-wife claims she's going to have been thrown in jail so I can be put on work release so all of the money will go to her.

She left me for another guy (a soldier) 5 years ago, and now he's progressed in rank and has been deployed - and I know they are not struggling financially like we are.

Think about it - rent is $732, $250 groceries, $100 gas, $200 electric = this equals $1282. Where is the child support money supposed to come from? Of course, there are several other expenses we have - but we prioritize what we need to live on - then pay child support - then pay other expenses.

Any advice on this situation is greatly appreciated.

You voluntarily left a job and became underemployed. The fact that you have other kids means nothing to the first set of children. They are your first priority. A third job might be in order. Mom of second set of kids need to work as well.

[Xena]

My question involves child support in the State of: ALABAMA

Here's some facts, in bullet form:
- July 31, 2008: Left job of 31K per year because job was taking too much of a toll on family and marriage; left to start a graphic design / marketing business
- December 28, 2008: Filed Petition to Modify Child Support, using an Affidavit of Substantial Hardship, to have child support reduced. My income dropped from $2650 per month to approximately $1,400 per month
- May 27, 2009: FINALLY went to court. After a month to hear back from judge, find out court INCREASED child support from $616 to $643, AND to pay an extra $75 per month to pay on arrears to purge myself of contempt (a total of $718 per month). If we couldn't pay the original $616, how could we pay the increase?
- September 24, 2009: Still not being able to pay (bear in mind I've been paying ex-wife average of $200 - $250 per month) the full amount, ex-wife is filing contempt to have me put in jail.

I currently have two children by a subsequent marriage (18 months and 3 months old). There is simply no way I can pay ex-wife the full amount of child support and continue to live. I've just landed a part time job at Winn-Dixie as a stocker, so that should help with the other income; but it's still not enough.

My arrears total about $5,200 right now. I have an attorney, but he's not that experienced in this area it seems, but I'm stuck with him, as I can't afford another (I'm bartering web design services in exchange for his representation).

Ex-wife claims she's going to have been thrown in jail so I can be put on work release so all of the money will go to her.

She left me for another guy (a soldier) 5 years ago, and now he's progressed in rank and has been deployed - and I know they are not struggling financially like we are.

Think about it - rent is $732, $250 groceries, $100 gas, $200 electric = this equals $1282. Where is the child support money supposed to come from? Of course, there are several other expenses we have - but we prioritize what we need to live on - then pay child support - then pay other expenses.

Any advice on this situation is greatly appreciated.

Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do at this point except to find a way to supplement your household income.

You voluntarily decreased your income by quitting your job and fell behind. That's the reason that you were found to be in contempt. IF you had been involuntarily laid off, you could have been granted a decrease.

When you filed for a modification you probably didn't consider the possibilty of the amount being increased if your ex is now earning more than when the order was issued, or last modified. Alabama uses both parent's incomes to determine CS, plus since you are voluntarily underemployed the court most likely imputed income to you based on what you had been earning.

Your method of detereming what gets paid is off, from a legal standpoint.
Legally, your CS obligation is number 1, the laws nor the courts care about your other expenses and legally it is expected that your CS will be paid before anything else is.

[Ozark]

"Legally, your CS obligation is number 1, the laws nor the courts care about your other expenses and legally it is expected that your CS will be paid before anything else is."

Interesting comment there. BUT, in order to make a living and to be able to work, other expenses BEFORE child support have to be in place. I have to have a place to live, I have to eat, and I have to support my other children as well.

My current wife does work - but it's still not enough unfortunately. I may have to get a third job. It does look like I'll have to find a cash only job and work some stuff under the table to survive and keep my second family going - I have to do what I have to do!

Hate to say it, but if I may rent is due, my current wife and kids have to have a roof over there heads, and I really don't give a damn what the courts say!

[jmjens2]

Please remember that you are trying to keep a roof over your two new children and keep their bellies full. It's also your resposibility to do the same for any previous child(ren).

These are CHILDREN that the child support is used for. And just because your ex is married to a deployed soldier does not mean that they aren't hurting for money!
I've been there, it's not that much extra!

As Antigone said "Mom of second set of kids need to work as well." I'm sorry but it's true. If you are hurting so badly for money, she NEEDS to go back to work. She needs to contribute to supporting the two children that you share. It's a tough economy right now, everyone has to make their sacrifies.

I went back to work the day after I got out of the hospital. My ex wasn't paying child support and we needed to pay rent, food, gas, and utilites.

[Ozark]

Fact of matter here is that the kids I pay child support to have a roof over there head, provided for by Uncle Sam. The two children I have now from current wife - they don't have that privilege, so it's up to my wife and I to provide that.

Also - I've got the judge in two errors in calculating child support; first, he didn't account for business expenses; he used the gross profit from self-employment income. Second, he allowed $100 over the daycare rate to be calculated; the maximum allowable by law should have been $228 - he awarded $326. Additionally, the kids are not in daycare - but they stay with ex-wife's best friend, who wrote a letter to the court saying she charged $326 a month for daycare, and the court accept that as proof (it wasn't on letterhead, no contact information, just her name).

The amount I pay now is eating at 50-60% of my average net income; over the past 2 months, if I were able to pay the full amount, it would have been 225% of my net income!!!

[jmjens2]

We can only tell you what the law says. In the laws eyes you have financial obligations to your first family first. If you can't afford to support the amount of children you have, then you shouldn't have so many children. I know that sounds harsh, but that's how it's looked at.

Check into seeing if you can have the court look over the way your gross profit was figured. It may have been a mistake. On the child care issue, I think $326 per month is a steal for daycare; I paid $350 per child for after school care.
It was pointed out before that you are voluntarily under-employed. That wasn't the courts decision or your ex-wife's, but yours. We all make decisions, right or wrong, and have to live with the consequences.

Your first children have a roof over their head because someone else has dedicated their life to serving our country. This man works countless hours of overtime without being paid extra, this man misses out on raising his own kids (while YOU stated you quit your last job because it was "taking too much of a toll on family and marriage"), this man deals deployments, training, and TDY's that are hell on a family and marriage, and this man risks his life to keep me and YOU safe. Please don't belittle this mans dedication to OUR country and say that UNCLE SAM is providing a roof over your childrens heads. Uncle Sam only signs the checks, it's this soldier who earned it and is providing it. You should be greatful to this man for providing for YOUR children, because you certianly aren't the one who is doing it.

OEF/OIF veteran and former single mom

[lifeistoughsosuckitup]

She left me for another guy (a soldier) 5 years ago, and now he's progressed in rank and has been deployed - and I know they are not struggling financially like we are.

Think about it - rent is $732, $250 groceries, $100 gas, $200 electric = this equals $1282. Where is the child support money supposed to come from? Of course, there are several other expenses we have - but we prioritize what we need to live on - then pay child support - then pay other expenses.

Any advice on this situation is greatly appreciated.

Ok, you asked for advice so you're going to get it. Others have already stated you left a much better paying job for a much lower income so no need to go into that. Let's get into what I quoted you on, ok?

How do you KNOW your ex is not struggling financially like you are w/your second family? Do you KNOW how much her husband makes and exactly WHAT her bills are? Gimme a break!

Ok, let me think about all YOUR expenses, then your question of where is the child support supposed to come from. ANSWER...YOU. Child support means SUPPORT YOUR CHILD(REN)! You PRIORITIZE? First you take care of your SECOND family, THEN your OLDER children?

Let's get REAL here. You HAD two children BEFORE having these next 2 children so you ALREADY KNEW you had LEGAL AND MORAL responsibilities to them, correct? With that in mind, ever consider BIRTH CONTROL UNTIL you could AFFORD to take care of FOUR children? You say you have a 3 mo old & 18 mo old...3 mo old can still be breast fed-no other food needed there!

All this time you've been looking for ways to TAKE AWAY FROM your 2 older children--who have done NOTHING to deserve this type of treatment from you! You claim you're so worried about it all, yet there ya went and made TWO MORE babies you can't provide for! Try A VASECTOMY!

Sorry bud, but if you came looking for sympathy and sneaky, underhanded ways of getting out of your responsibilities, you most likely won't find it in this forum.

[rppearso]

Ok, you asked for advice so you're going to get it. Others have already stated you left a much better paying job for a much lower income so no need to go into that. Let's get into what I quoted you on, ok?

How do you KNOW your ex is not struggling financially like you are w/your second family? Do you KNOW how much her husband makes and exactly WHAT her bills are? Gimme a break!

Ok, let me think about all YOUR expenses, then your question of where is the child support supposed to come from. ANSWER...YOU. Child support means SUPPORT YOUR CHILD(REN)! You PRIORITIZE? First you take care of your SECOND family, THEN your OLDER children?

Let's get REAL here. You HAD two children BEFORE having these next 2 children so you ALREADY KNEW you had LEGAL AND MORAL responsibilities to them, correct? With that in mind, ever consider BIRTH CONTROL UNTIL you could AFFORD to take care of FOUR children? You say you have a 3 mo old & 18 mo old...3 mo old can still be breast fed-no other food needed there!

All this time you've been looking for ways to TAKE AWAY FROM your 2 older children--who have done NOTHING to deserve this type of treatment from you! You claim you're so worried about it all, yet there ya went and made TWO MORE babies you can't provide for! Try A VASECTOMY!

Sorry bud, but if you came looking for sympathy and sneaky, underhanded ways of getting out of your responsibilities, you most likely won't find it in this forum.

So where are the forums on the sneaky underhanded ways to modify child support? I know they exist but it is difficult to find them on google. Also the OP was asking about what to do now, im sure he realizes what he did was not the best idea but what is the solution at this point or will he just go to jail and if so how long is a sentence for that, I am guessing it would be life imprisionment because if his child support order is more than he makes and his arrears are through the roof he will never be able to pay it off, I thought I found a good forum that had the hope off offering sound legal advice and if the only advice is he is going to jail indefinitly then it is what it is but is all the commentary from the peanut gallery really nessicary. Maybe the next step is get a good lawyer so he can get a minimum security prison

[Antigone]

So where are the forums on the sneaky underhanded ways to modify child support? I know they exist but it is difficult to find them on google.

http://tinyurl.com/ycctxqw

It was my pleasure