Division of Assets - Engagement Ring Dispute

**Rissa** · 08-24-2009, 06:43 PM

(If this thread is not in the appropriate section, please advise me as to where to place it so that I can guarantee a better response)

My ex-fiance and I broke up a year ago this month. Originally he had told me to keep the rings and that he wanted nothing from me, but has recently changed his mind. We bought the rings together, we both signed for them and we made payments together. A few months later he took out a loan, entirely in his name against my wishes, and paid the rings off completely with the loan, which (I believe) legally freed me of any contractual debt to the rings. Now he is having trouble paying off the loan and is coming to me for money to help. I never wear the rings so I told him that he can have them back and sell them for money to pay off his loan. This apparently is not good enough for him. He wants money, not the rings. He says the only way he will accept the rings is if I get them appraised to prove that they are currently worth at least $1000 still. Otherwise, he says he is going to take me to court for 50% of the loan and then if I lose I'd have to pay the court fees. I am wondering what his chances of winning this are, if I am completely willing to give him back the rings, and if I am even under obligation to give back the rings or money at all since the loan was, in its entirety, in his name. I feel that, at the very least, I should not have to have to pay for them to be appraised, and since we were never bound by marriage, what are my obligations should a guy show up at my door with a summons?

Granted, he may not take it that far, but I want to be prepared just in case as he has been threatening to take such measures.

Any help on this matter would be greatly appreciated; I don't have the ability to seek out actual legal counsel and don't even know that it'll be necessary.

Please help!

**Mr. Knowitall** · 08-27-2009, 07:28 AM

A jewelry appraisal is pretty much meaningless. If they're truly appraising for FMV, the value will inevitably be much lower than store retail. The appraisers used by resellers, on the other hand, often give such inflated appraisals of used jewelry and estate jewelry that it's hard to know what planet they're from.

As you didn't tell us your state, nobody can investigate the laws of your state. In a typical state, an engagement ring is now returned to the giver at the end of the relationship (regardless of fault). The historic rule, which may still apply in some states, is that the ring must be returned if the relationship ends due to the fault of the recipient, but can be kept if the break-up is the fault of the giver (you can see, I'm sure, how messy litigation of those issues could be; the new rule is much simpler).

You refer to both "ring" and "rings" - You're speaking of an engagement ring and a matching wedding band? In a typical state and under typical facts they would be a conditional gift from him to you, and you would return them to him after breaking up. If this also includes a band that you were ostensibly buying for him on the same loan, or if you had some sort of agreement that you were going to pay for part of your own rings, things are potentially more complicated.

**Rissa** · 08-27-2009, 09:28 AM

Thank you for your response! I am sorry that I did not supply enough information previously. I live in Florida. The rings that I am referring to are my engagement and wedding band that came together and a band for him. We bought all three together. I only have my rings however. I ended the engagement, and I am more than willing to return the rings but this does not satisfy him.

**Mr. Knowitall** · 08-27-2009, 12:40 PM

And the end of the day, I suspect it will have to be. If he sues you, take the rings along with you to small claims court (I'm assuming we're in that price range) and make clear to the judge that the only reason he doesn't already have them is because he refuses to accept their return.