Biological Father Comes Forward After Seven Years

**DadForever** · 07-07-2009, 02:15 PM

My question involves paternity law for the State of: Florida

My wife (live in girlfriend) at the time was in a short relationship with a coworker where she worked. She told me she was pregnant but she wasn't sure of the father. Once we discussed it with a doctor the timing looked like it was mine so we got married and had a beautiful girl. Now 7 years later the Biological Father contacts her and says he needs to know if he is the Father. I refused to do this but he and my wife decided to do the home DNA test on thier own without my concent. It turns out that he is the Father. My wife has decided to get a divorce but wants me to remain the Father regardless. What are my legal rights? My name is on the Birth Certificate. Can they change it? Who pays the support? If I get custody do they pay support? I love this child and only want the best for her.

**aardvarc** · 07-07-2009, 07:03 PM

If the child isn't yours, you can count on not getting custody. Regardless of your consent, the potential father could have (and probably still will if he's bent on establishing himself as father) gotten a court order for paternity testing - them doing the home version just gave a quicker answer - a step which you could/should have done when the baby was born since there was already some level of doubt. Your wife can want you to remain in the baby's life, but that involvement will come on her parenting time - the father will be allocated his own parenting time once custody/visitation/child support gets hammered out. Can they change birth certificates? Yes, they can.

Who pays the support? The father.

On RARE occasions, courts can find that it's in the best interest of the child that things remain status quo - however this usually happens when there's some MAJOR issue with the father (like he's a convicted child rapist, or in prison for life, etc.), and if divorce is already on the horizon, the child's life is about to be shaken up regardless, so the odds of the court NOT recognizing the father as the father are slim unless there are circumstances not yet revealed.

**DadForever** · 07-09-2009, 07:29 PM

Thanks for the answers. Yes my lack of taking responsability and finding out who the father was 7 years ago probibly made things worse for the child. I will stay in the childs life if allowed to.

Divorce is on the horizon. She is talking about marrying this guy. niether one has a job and he tells her that he needs my support to help take care of her and the girls. There are other circumstances with my wife (sexual fetishes) with other parties that she threatens me not to bring up to any lawyers or in a court setting(I have proof). She also has been dealing with phsycological problems for about 3 years that is still on going. Would this help me in any way or should i just lay down and not fight for anything? I just want the best for the children.

**Mr. Knowitall** · 07-09-2009, 07:40 PM

The question in part turns on what you want to do. If you want to maintain paternity, and a court finds that to be in the child's best interest, the court will likely dismiss the biological father's paternity petition on the basis that it's contrary to the child's best interest to upset the existing parent-child relationship. If you don't want to maintain paternity, and the biological father brings a paternity action, the court will likely find that it is in the child's best interest for the biological father to be recognized as the child's legal father due to your disinterest in continuing as father.

If you maintain paternity, you will have custody and visitation rights and a support obligation. If you do not, you risk losing all access to the child but won't have to pay support.

**aardvarc** · 07-09-2009, 09:52 PM

There are other circumstances with my wife (sexual fetishes) with other parties that she threatens me not to bring up to any lawyers or in a court setting(I have proof). She also has been dealing with phsycological problems for about 3 years that is still on going.

Since you stayed married to her despite these things, it only makes you look like a vengeful ass and believe me when I tell you that you DON'T want to hear a judge tell you such in open court - particularly since, if the fetishes don't have anything to do with minors or blatantly illegal activity (like corpses) they are irrelevent. This is a case of paternity and what's in the child's best interests - keep it that way (and remember, you have no idea what the judge has on under their robe).