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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    The South
    Posts
    7

    Arrow What is Considered Abandonment, and When Can I Take the Father's Rights Away

    Hello...
    Thanks in advance to any answers given and for your time reading this.

    A little background:
    Me and Ex husband were married 1 yr when I had Daughter.ExH abused me in every way,and the last time(he got taken to jail)was when she was 6 months old.We got seperated..and filed for divorce when she was 4.He tried to kill me later that year and we(me and daughter)moved.
    He went to the Army after serving in the Army Reserves but he got in a car accident and was dismissed..then after a couple of years he got strong again and went..In which he suffered mental trauma and left again.(which is why he is self medicating,and i absolutely do not want her around him!)
    During all this time,my daughter is almost 8 and has seen her father probably 20 times(or less)including at the MOST 3 birthdays,3 christmases and no other holidays.He hangs out in the neighborhood where my childhood home is,and when she comes for the weekends she is also there for his visitations(which are supervised and for 8 hours,4 hours on Sat. 4 on Sun.) which he has NOT came to in years.He passes right by there on his way to the dumps and trap houses he hangs out at..never once stopping to check on her.He has sent threatening texts starting with "Im not threatining(sp) you but....if I have to i will pursue legal action to see my daughter,she needs me in her life"type things.EVEN THOUGH HE NEVER COMES TO SEE HER!He calls and when he sees I wont leave my husband for him to "get his family he messed up back together because he loves me more now than ever" he starts with the crazy threats.Please help..My family says I need to leave his rights in tact because he could die or his family and she will be left with nothing if I take them all away.
    Can I take all the rights away EXCEPT financial responcibility?
    What do I do to get an abandonment case started?
    Can I get her last name changed to my maiden name and him still be on the birth certificate and have responcibility for her...?(My maiden name is already part of her name..and which my daughter and my family all agree is good as well as I do because none of his family EVER contacts or sees her unless she is out and about with my fam back home..)
    Please help..I dont know what else to do because this really concerns me and she deserves better.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Officially across the country from where I've been all my life
    Posts
    3,073

    Default Re: What is Concidered Abandonment.and Can I Take His Rights Away

    Quote Quoting GodPleaseHelpMyHubby
    View Post
    Hello...
    Thanks in advance to any answers given and for your time reading this.

    A little background:
    Me and Ex husband were married 1 yr when I had Daughter.ExH abused me in every way,and the last time(he got taken to jail)was when she was 6 months old.We got seperated..and filed for divorce when she was 4.He tried to kill me later that year and we(me and daughter)moved.
    He went to the Army after serving in the Army Reserves but he got in a car accident and was dismissed..then after a couple of years he got strong again and went..In which he suffered mental trauma and left again.(which is why he is self medicating,and i absolutely do not want her around him!)
    During all this time,my daughter is almost 8 and has seen her father probably 20 times(or less)including at the MOST 3 birthdays,3 christmases and no other holidays.He hangs out in the neighborhood where my childhood home is,and when she comes for the weekends she is also there for his visitations(which are supervised and for 8 hours,4 hours on Sat. 4 on Sun.) which he has NOT came to in years.He passes right by there on his way to the dumps and trap houses he hangs out at..never once stopping to check on her.He has sent threatening texts starting with "Im not threatining(sp) you but....if I have to i will pursue legal action to see my daughter,she needs me in her life"type things.EVEN THOUGH HE NEVER COMES TO SEE HER!He calls and when he sees I wont leave my husband for him to "get his family he messed up back together because he loves me more now than ever" he starts with the crazy threats.Please help..My family says I need to leave his rights in tact because he could die or his family and she will be left with nothing if I take them all away.
    Can I take all the rights away EXCEPT financial responcibility?
    What do I do to get an abandonment case started?
    Can I get her last name changed to my maiden name and him still be on the birth certificate and have responcibility for her...?(My maiden name is already part of her name..and which my daughter and my family all agree is good as well as I do because none of his family EVER contacts or sees her unless she is out and about with my fam back home..)
    Please help..I dont know what else to do because this really concerns me and she deserves better.
    YOU can't have his rights taken away. The only entity that can strip a parent of their parental rights is the court, with that being said:

    You can't have it both ways. You're requesting that is parental rights be relinquished, then he no longer has a child. That makes him just as financially responsible for your child as I am - which means NONE. If you want the child's name changed, you will need his consent, because it's HIS child as well. Oh, and so long as he makes ANY contact, he hasn't abandonded the child. That example of a text message isn't a threat, in fact, it should be a promise. You should save it and take it to court, it make work in his favor. It shows that you are doing something to make seeing his child difficult.
    If you wanted babies all to yourself, you should have created them by yourself. Until you do that, children have the right to BOTH parents, especially since you found them suitable to procreate with.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,772

    Default Re: What is Concidered Abandonment.and Can I Take His Rights Away

    After reading your other posts, it certainly seems that you have some problems going on in your life with your present husband and his arrest and probabtion violations.

    This is NOT the best time to do anything accusing your ex, he would certainly bring up the enviroment that you have placed your child in.

    For now, ignore the texts, unless he files in court to establish or enfoce a visitation order. You might want to look into going ahead and filing now to enforce the CS order since he is in arrears.

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