Barring the Gigirle comment; months of marriage won't buy your hillbilly keister squat! In order to qualify for division of community property you have to stick it out for quite awhile, especially in Texas. Look at W'ubya! He's been there forever and look what he's got after 8 years in office...Laura, and Cheney in a bunny suit shootin' Peter Cottentail; theirs a picture for the year book!
What you get? Play a country song backwards on the 'record player'; turntable ya yahoo. Ya get sober, your dog back, your horse back, and your wife back (not necessarily in that order).
Pick wisely old man. Mr. Edd has you in his sights....Wilber!