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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Slander against a minor child

    My wife was watching our neighbors kids, 7 and 4, back in July. We have a son, 5, and a daughter, 4. And we have been neighbors for a few years and our kids have been friendly since we moved here.

    The 7 year old, a girl, who did not want to go home but stay and play some more, told her Mom when she came to pick them up, and my wife, that she took her clothes off upstairs when playing with my 5 year old son.

    Her Mom was shocked and said to her this was naughty. She became upset because she realized her Mom did not think this was funny.

    Four days later the girl's father called me saying my 5 year old son "sodomized" his 7 year old daughter and his 4 year old son. I told him this was out rageous and I would not discuss this on the phone.

    He then called HHS (state agency). I checked with an attorney who recommended we allow the HHS to complete there investigation and to be compliant, avoid contact with the neighbor, and maintain our comosure, which we did. We have nothing to hide.

    They investigated my home, interviewed my children on video, and closed out their case.

    We cut off all communication to these neighbors immediately after his original phone call to me, which I told him was outrageous. I believe him to be quite unstable and unreasonable. He sent me a 4 page email one month after this alleged incident.
    This man, who is a licensed pychological counselor and a pastoral counselor in a church, told me his daughter on the day her Mom took her home, was hysterical, crying and saying she "felt dirty" and "wanted to take a shower".

    His email was very disturbing, and was deemed "pathological" by a clinical psychologist and we were encouraged to keep our distance and avoid any contact.

    In this email he said he "confronted" my son on the school playground, and "burst his little bubble". This man is 47 years old. My son is 5 and all of 36 pounds. His 7 year old daughter is a strong willed, precocious girl, much bigger than my son physically, and I admired her maturity level.

    I called another neighbor on 12/27/05, also the school PTA secretary, to ask if she had heard any rumors about my son. I was going with my gut instinct, she had been rude to my wife for some time and we could not understand why whe was acting this way since we ad been friendly for several years.

    She immediately said, "I know what happened to the (neighbors') kids. They daid that (my son) sodomized them, and I know that (our neighbors) went to every parent in (my son's) class and told them this".

    I confirmed with her that he used the word "sodomized", she confirmed.

    I was appalled and shocked. There are at least 20 kids in my son's KG class, we don't know 95% of them. They all live in this new community.

    This neighbor believes this happened, her daughter is in my son's KG class. She said she is fearful of my son, and she has to protect her daughter. As PTA Secreatary she has weekly contact with the school Principal.

    Our community is quite small. The elementry school is overwhelmingly local kids from our community.

    The school principal, back in November, called us about "incidents" with my son. She said there have been numerous complaints from parents about my son. She would not say what, or who. She removed him from recess.

    This did not make sense to us, but after finding out my neighbor went to every parent in my son's class and said my son "sodomized" his kids, this is beginning to make sense.

    I am meeting with an attorney that does defamation a slander cases but I wanted your opinion too.

    Here are my questions to you:

    Do we have a case for a restraining order against our neighbor?

    Do we send a cease and desist letter?

    Can we sue this neighbor for defamation and slander, for mental anguish and distress (my wife has had to go on medication as a result of the stress of these neighbors actions and the rude behavior of our neighbors that were told this lie - I have not slept well for 5 months, affecting my work, and had stomach problems since)

    Do we have a case against the school?

    I will not back down. I will defend my son and our family.

    I ahve found out this man has a history of vicious attacks on people who have crossed him.

    Thank you for any information that would help us in our efforts.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Behind a Desk

    Default Defamation Against A Child

    Your neighbor sounds like something of a lunatic....

    You should consult a local lawyer who handles defamation actions about your case, to devise a remedy which is most likely to bring this conduct to a conclusion. The accusations against your son sound like they would constitute defamation per se - if that's the case it would mean that it would be up to your neighbor to prove the allegations true if sued (rather than a normal defamation case, where you would have to prove the statements false).

    I have no idea if you have any sort of claim against the school. If the school is concerned about actual "incidents", whatever those happen to be, the school is entitled to raise its concerns to you and to impose appropriate discipline.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006


    Thank you.

    Do I have a case against the gossiping women running around telling people this? I confirmed at least 4 neighbors were told by her - she is a third party spoken to by the "lunatic" neighbor. She sees no harm in spreading this nonsense around.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2005

    Default Defamation

    Generally speaking, the fact that you are "merely repeating" an actionable, defamatory statement you have heard from somebody else does prevent your being sued - this is something to discuss with your lawyer.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006


    Do I have a case to file a restraining order? I don't want this man to confront my children ever again.

    If so, how do i go about doing this?

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