Ex Living with No Water or Electricity. Can I Get Custody?

[Father to an Angel]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Ohio

My ex ran off with my daughter almost two months ago, taking almost all of my earthly possessions and every dime of money I had. While I wasn't ok with this, I didn't do anything about it because I didn't think there was anything I could do since fathers have zero rights in this country (big mistake, I know). Now I find out that she and my daughter are living in an old run down farm house with no running water and no electricity. The house belongs to an acquaintance who lives elsewhere. She got a "job" working some sort of internship where she only gets $50 a week which pays for a cell phone and cigarettes. She's also filed for cash assistance from the county which automatically put me in for child support. I don't know how it is that my daughter is getting food, etc.

Currently, I'm living with family while I save up enough money to start over. I have recently started an extremely well paying job that should help expedite that process.

I do NOT want my daughter living in those kinds of conditions so I want to try to get custody of her so she can live like a human being and not an animal.

The questions I have are:

1) What is my legal custody right now? I never signed any papers and there have not been any court hearings, so don't I still have 50/50 custody in the eyes of the law?

2) Do I have a chance to have the courts order that my daughter is to live with me or would I just be wasting money and time on a lawyer? I know that not having my own home is a big strike against me, but it's a thousand times better than where my daughter is right now. I'm afraid that if I wait too long to do anything (like waiting to save up and get my own home, etc) it may be too late but I'm afraid that if I do something now in my current situation it could ruin any future chances I may have.


I tried to be as brief as possible. Thanks for any help.

[LawResearcherMissy]

since fathers have zero rights in this country

Arrrrrrrrgh. YES, they DO, even here in bass-ackwards Ohio.

I never signed any papers and there have not been any court hearings, so don't I still have 50/50 custody in the eyes of the law?

You don't specify whether you were married to your ex or whether this is an ex girlfriend. If it's an ex girlfriend, was paternity legally established through the courts?

If it wasn't, you don't have any legal rights to the child yet. You've got a tougher fight on your hands than if you had been married or had paternity legally established, but it IS winnable.

Get a lawyer. Do it now. If paternity has not yet been legally established, do it, then file for custody of your daughter.

Custody is not determined by the configuration of the genitalia of the prospective custodial parent, but rather by the best interests of the child. You're not going to find a court in the land that would argue that it's in the best interests of the child to live without running water and electricity simply because the parent she is with is sporting two X chromosomes.

[Father to an Angel]

We were never married. Also, I'm unclear as to what "legal paternity" means. I was there when she was born and I signed her birth certificate. She has my last name. Do I need to go to the courts and establish paternity through DNA or is this sufficient?

And my "zero rights" comments are based partially on observations with friends and family in custody situations and partially on exasperation at my situation.

[LawResearcherMissy]

Do I need to go to the courts and establish paternity through DNA

Yes. Signing the birth certificate is not enough.

[gigirle]

What you need to do NOW is call CPS. They will send someone out there to see the living conditions and if there is food, etc. Tomorrow get a lawyer and have him file for emergency custody.

Since you signed the BC, you are legally her father. She may now come back and say that you are not (but since she's put you on the hook for CS, you have good case against that).

Don't base your experiences on what you have heard. Every case is unique. You might just find that you will have a good experience. LOTS of people live with relatives and having your own place isn't grounds for not getting custody. You have rights as well.

[aaron]

By "signing her birth certificate", I assume you mean that you executed an acknowledgment of paternity affidavit. Establishing your paternity in that manner gives you standing to seek custody or a formal visitation order, and forms the basis of an obligation to pay child support. Unless somebody seeks to set aside the acknowledgment, it establishes paternity and no further DNA testing or court finding of paternity is required.

[Father to an Angel]

By "signing her birth certificate", I assume you mean that you executed an acknowledgment of paternity affidavit.

I assume that's what it was because #1 was accomplished.


@gigirle: I want to make 100% certain that I can get her back to my custody before I do that, though. I can't bear the thought of her in state custody. The biggest thing right now is, like I mentioned, I just started a new job and am saving up money. I don't know that I can afford a lawyer just yet. Any ideas on what I can do about that? Any good websites with lists of pro bono lawyers by city or county for Ohio?

[Father to an Angel]

Update:

Either she was lying to me when she said she had no electricity and water or she fixed it since I last talked with her but I called Child Protective Services and they said everything there was fine.

Now my ex is quoting some law she found that says that in the state of Ohio "unwed mothers have full and total custody of the child." And now she doesn't answer the phone when I call anymore. I cannot talk to my daughter and I don't know exactly where she is living (the house is owned by an acquaintance who hates me almost as much as I hate him, so I had CPS go to his house to get the address from him. They won't tell me.)

What do I do now? What can I do? I assume that this law probably has to do with situations where the father wasn't around at the time of the child's birth and didn't sign one of those paternity affidavits. Although, it isn't out my realm of belief that the law is so retarded that it would deny me all paternal rights just because we were never married. I guess that living together for 5 years and having a child together amounts to nothing at all.

[gigirle]

You need to get an attorney to figure out if you are the childs legal parent. Call legal aid to see if they can assist you. They may be able to help you. Are you paying CS?

If it's determined that your the legal father....file for custody.

As far as the comment on "unwed mothers..." I have no idea what she is saying and you need to take what she says with a grain of salt.

What county are you in?

[Father to an Angel]

I'm living in Cuyahoga County and she's living in Clark County.

I am not currently paying child support but she did file for cash assistance and I got a CSEA letter "welcoming" me to the system. It didn't give any specifics on child support at all and didn't specify an amount or anything. I'm still waiting on all of that.

And on her "law" she did offer to tell me exactly what law it was (the section, article or whatever) but at the time I told her to forget it. Now since she cut communications with me I have no way to get that from her to know where she found it. I'd like to know what law she's quoting so I can look at it myself and see if she's just interpreting it to her own views or if she's misquoting it in purpose.

EDIT:

I think she may be quoting from here:
http://domestic.cuyahogacounty.us/faq.htm

"In Ohio by statute O.R.C. 3109.042, unmarried mothers are presumed to be the proper residential parent unless a court has determined something different. The first place to go for assistance would be the local police department."