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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    My question involves criminal law for the state of: Texas

    We have a difficult situation to handle. What I would like as the parent of the daughter is for the boy to get conseling. Parents are concerned that there will be legal issues, and are fearfull to follow through, but we are worried if it goes un-checked that it will get worse and more serious...

    The boy basically approached our daughter while sleeping in another room, and coerced her to kiss him twice by stating he would not be her friend, and that if she had a boyfriend, they would not like being told no, exposed himself, and wanted her to touch him, to which she said no, and asked her to get on her hands and knees, which she also said no. There are more details, but this is enough for the point to be made...

    Thankfully our daughter does not even realize the seriousness of the matter, and she is more concerned about him getting in trouble, or being upset at her for telling.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2007

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    Best option and only option is to report this to the local authorities. For one a boy that young doing such a thing is most likely being or has been sexually abused in his own house as he has been growing up.

    Things like this can not go unreported does not matter who the person is. If it was my daughter that 12 year old boy would be custody already and most likely pending charges or already charged.

    This is serious in nature and needs to be reported immediately. The boy will get counseling when he is sitting in juvenile hall.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    My husband made the orgianal post and I am his wife just giving an update.

    Just to clear up a few things and to give an update. He did expose himself to her and a she did a few things she didn't want to becuase he used the "I wont be your friend, I wont talk to you, and I wont let you go swimmining tomorrow" so she eventually gave in with guilt. That is wrong. He wont admit to anything but giving her a "peck" on the cheek, which isn't even close to what happened.

    His parents did call a therapist and the therapist's office ended up reporting it and CPS was at her house yesterday. He still doesn't admit to it. CPS said they will be calling us or coming out here to talk to my daughter. It worked out kinda good becuase we didn't have to report it and he will for sure get help now. CPS already said he will have to go through counseling just for what they know so far, they don't know all the actual facts that happened, which may change things I don't know.

    He is 12 and she is 7. He is much bigger than she is and she said she didn't feel comfortable telling the adult that was in the house. He is taller than me. Even so it doesn't matter how close they in age if someone says no the answer is no!! She kept telling me he was getting angry with her when she would say no. My kids were staying the night there because my father was having surgery, so we weren't there.

    It is now in the hands of CPS to determine what will happen and atleast he will get some help.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    It depends...

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    Thanks for the update. Things worked out the way they should have. I hope your daughter will be okay. Good Luck.

    ps. I know bigcountry will be relieved too.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    Thanks for everyones input!

    I think my daughter will be fine. She doesn't show any signs or concerns from the situation but that dosen't mean inside she's not feeling them. From everything she has told us she was more concerned with him getting in trouble and him being mad at her. Thats the caring nature that she has for people. I don't think she gets the full magitude of the situation which could actually be a good thing.

    Thanks again!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2005

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    The debate over when to involve legal authorities has been moved to its own thread.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    Just thought I would post another update. As of today CPS called me and asked me what my daughter told me and I told them. It was obviously a totally different story that what my newphew said and it changed the situation a lot. Then they called my husband and daughter and talked with them. She basically told them the same thing she told me. So on Monday we have to go to a Child Advocacy Center and she will be talked to there. In another room watching will be the CPS lady, the DA's office and a police officer. After that they will come talk to us and let us know what they want to do.

    The CPS lady told me today that worse case he is old enough to be charged with Exposure to a child and will have to register as a sex offender. She said that it is the first time she has every had a case where she felt " do I really have to turn this in". We understand that she has no choice. All we wanted was to get him counseling and he is already doing that, he has already went to his first appointment. She said we can talk to the DA's office and explain that we really don't want criminal charges to be filed, but in the end we don't get the final say.

    I think criminally charging him and making him register as a sex offender is just too far, especially since they already have him in counseling. We will find out more on Monday!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2007

    Default Re: 12 Year Old Cousin and 7 Year Old Daughter

    Some states have laws that recognize Juvenile Sex Offenders separately from Registered Sex Offenders. In most states a RSO can not get within xxx feet of where children congregate (playgrounds, boy scout camps, schools, bus stops, etc.) which makes it very hard for a child to get an education and even convicted juveniles are entitled to a fair and equal education. My guess is that there will be a helluva plea bargain made.

    Regardless of the charges, this young man/monster should stay in counseling and have friends and family keep a close eye on him to ensure he does not reoffend.

    She's 7 and will come to realize what he did was evil. Even if she was 18 and he was 23, it would have been evil. Even if they weren't cousins it would have been evil; No means No! This might not seem to haunt her now but it will haunt her as she grows up, particularly as she gets an understanding of what those organs are used for and the stigma associated with them. It won't hurt to occasionally see a counselor even after the initial treatment has been completed. If she starts to become intraverted when she gets older 10-11, gains more than normal weight (this happens frequently to abused females), or does not have normal relationships with boys or girls then seeing the counselor on occasion and you (the family) talking to the counselor on occasion will help.

    God be with this little lady...

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