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  1. #1

    Default Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non-Custodial Parent?

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Arkansas
    I have full custody of my 11 year old daughter. Her biological father didn't even enter the picture until she was 7 and then came into her life full force and wanting all of "his rights". He has standard visitation and makes her go every other weekend and 8 weeks in the summer. He lives 3 hours away so the trip up there and back gets really tiring for her. Also she is gone all summer (I go get her every other weekend though) She still has a life here and there are things that she wants to do in the summer here.
    Is there an age that she can decide how much time she spends with him? If there is a weekend that she wants to do something else can she refuse to go? Or say if she wanted to do something here this summer, can he force her to stay with him all summer?
    Oh and BTW, we have not been to court about this. It was just settled out of court that he would have regular visitation.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    9,085

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    Quote Quoting SRESECKER
    View Post
    Oh and BTW, we have not been to court about this. It was just settled out of court that he would have regular visitation.
    If you have not been to court, you can do what you want.

    However, if you push the issue, he can go to court and then you cannot allow your child to miss visitation without being held in contempt of court.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    When he first came into the picture I got a lawyer. I thought what I was signing was for to go with him 2 weeks the first summer and add a week every year. He shows up a my door one weekend with a police and a court order and says it's his weekend. (I had never even seen a standard visitation schedule) that was 3 years ago and she has gone with him every other weekend since and 8 weeks in the summer. I called my lawyer and he had quit. I called another lawyer who told me just to let it go since he wasn't trying to get joint custody.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    9,085

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    Okay... I am not going to play this game.

    Is their court ordered visitation or not?

    If there is, you HAVE been to court about it.

    If there is, you HAVE to abide by whatever it says or you will be in contempt of court.

    The 11 year old has no say in the matter. She can decide where she goes when she is 18.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    You don't have to play this game

    Just never mind

    No we haven't been to court.
    I signed papers with my lawyer.

    Thanks anyway

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
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    2,032

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    Quote Quoting SRESECKER
    View Post
    You don't have to play this game

    Just never mind

    No we haven't been to court.
    I signed papers with my lawyer.


    Thanks anyway

    Which were then filed with the COURT. You have a court order. 11 year olds do NOT get to decide to visit. If you fail to provide your daughter for visitation you will be in contempt of court.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    Yes, I know that and I have complied with that for 3 years. She just doesn't like staying there for 8 weeks in the summer. (she is 3 hours away and he limits the times I can call her) I guess the only way to change anything is to go to court.

    Ok, I really don't need anyone else trying to make me feel like an idiot. I shouldn't have even posted this.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    9,085

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    We are not trying to make you feel anything.

    You filed signed agreements on visitation with a lawyer who then filed it in court but said that you had no court order visitation agreement.

    If visitation has been agreed to and filed with the court, that agreement MUST be adhered to on both sides.

    Your child does not get to choose if she wishes to adhere to it. You don't get to choose if she adheres to it. HE doesn't get to choose if he adheres to it.

    It is a court order. Court orders are not suggestions. If you wish the parameters of the order changed, the only place to do that is in court.

    Apparently, anytime someone doesn't say, "You are right ... you can do what you want" they are calling you an idiot.

    I can't help your perception.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    The funny thing is, I had a question about a land deed. I guess questions about land deeds aren't hot topics. Someone had told me that when a child is 12 years old they refuse to go with a non custodial parent for the weekend. Now I didn't know if that was right or not. So when I seen the visitation section I thought I would see if anyone on here know. Gosh, I didn't know it would be a big deal.

    THANK YOU FOR ANSWERING THIS QUESTION FOR ME AND NOW I KNOW THAT INFORMATION WAS IN FACT NOT RIGHT.

    That's why I don't normally get on these forums because I am not a debtor.
    I just had a question.

    This situation has been a difficult one for me. Difficult for my child. We've both been to counseling. That's why I shouldn't have posted this.

    Thank you once again and now that I know the answer no one else has to post anything.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    582

    Default Re: Can A Child Refuse To Go With Non Custodial Parent?

    It might be a good idea to discuss your situation with a lawyer. If something were to happen to you then the father could step in and take full custody. If that is ok with you then fine, but if not, then you will need a court order for custody, support and guardianship. Papers being filed with the court isn't the same thing as an order signed by a judge.

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