My question involves a child custody case from the State of: CT
My exhusband and I have a 2 year old daughter. Joint legal custody, I have physical custody and he has weekly visitation. He has never played a part in dr. visits (invited to all appts, notified of them, filled in etc...) in the past and still doesn't. I have always filled him in afterwards and we have had no problems working together for her health etc...
This past week I took our daughter for her 2 year old checkup. I had told ex what concerns I had and would be sharing with the dr. I put it in writing in our child's notebook that goes on visits. He didn't respond. So, I took her to the dr visit and shared my concerns, which resulted in some treatments- she has a very bad anal fissure, and suspected asthma. She is on meds for both and I take her back in 8 weeks to see if working and what other treament/appts are necessary. So I tell this to ex and he is fine with it. Until his girlfriend catches wind of it. Now he wants to go and talk with the dr because he doesn't believe me. Fine, go ahead, I have nothing to hide, and our pediatrician is wonderful and very aware of what is going on.
I feel a lot if coming from the girlfriend (she hates me!) - she is the driving force in the problems we are now encountering- he does not return phone calls, he actually asked her if a particular visit (a pre-planned one) with our daughter was ok with her, otherwise he'd change it; can be heard in the background telling him to only pay me 47% of med bills rather than splitting it 50/50 like we have been doing etc... She is constantly trying to cause problems, and has been for a long time now. When she is not around, ex and I get along well, converse without a problem, (regarding our daughter), work together with scheduling etc..., he is so much more involved and shows a much greater interest in his daughter's life when alone!
So, my question is, what right does the girlfriend have to sit in on the discussion with the pediatrician? She has no legal right to my daughter, so can I have a note placed in her file that limits those allowed in exams, or consults with dr to my exhusband and myself? I have no problem with him talking to the dr, actually it would be good for him, but I don't feel it's him behind this. Does the same go for when she is school aged and things like parent teacher conferences etc?
Thanks for any help!