Non-Court Ordered Visitation

**jrsmith83** · 04-14-2008, 10:20 AM

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Oklahoma. My cousin has been paying child suport to his ex-girlfriend for his son. His child support is not court ordered. He has been doing it to help take care of his son. The kicker to it is that she will not let him see his son. She continues to treatin with a attorney and that she will take him for all the money she can and full custody. All my cousin wants is to see his son. She is confinded to a wheel chair and the baby (10 months old) has Downs Syndrome. We as a family are complety worried about his well being as she is a partier. She is in the process now of tring to put a restraining order on him because he refused to give her the support until he got to see his son. What should we do?

**Xena** · 04-14-2008, 11:33 AM

Quoting jrsmith83

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Oklahoma. My cousin has been paying child suport to his ex-girlfriend for his son. His child support is not court ordered. He has been doing it to help take care of his son. The kicker to it is that she will not let him see his son. She continues to treatin with a attorney and that she will take him for all the money she can and full custody. All my cousin wants is to see his son. She is confinded to a wheel chair and the baby (10 months old) has Downs Syndrome. We as a family are complety worried about his well being as she is a partier. She is in the process now of tring to put a restraining order on him because he refused to give her the support until he got to see his son. What should we do?

Your cousin NEEDS to file for custody, visitation, CS and to establish paternity ASAP.

He should also make sure that he can prove that he has paid CS without a court order. Sometimes a Judge will give credit for support paid before an order, but quite often it will be treated as a gift. He should also stop worrying about her threat to take all the money- CS will be based on the state's guidelines, not what the mother says.

**jrsmith83** · 04-14-2008, 07:15 PM

Does he need to get a attorney to do this? The reason I am asking is his money is tight. Is this something that he can do without a attorney?

**ally** · 04-14-2008, 07:37 PM

Your cousin can look into legal aid through the county courthouse where the child resides to see if they'll represent him.

If that doesn't work out and he absolutely can not find an attorney that will work under a payment plan while similtaneously (sp) filing all the necessary motions then he is left with filing the case himself.

He can go to the County court house where the child resides and ask for a packet to establish paternity and file for custody. The clerk can give him the packets (usually can cost 10-30 dollars) but its best if he gets some kind of experienced, knowledgeable person to help him fill them out. Not filing the right forms or misreprsenting information can complicate things even more.

Work quickly but do it right. Good luck!!